Things I would never have thought I would want to say.

Changing my hairdresser as the extra added on for PPE makes them too expensive for a simple dry cut that takes no more than half an hour.

I overheard a panicked shriek the other day. Stop, stop right now! I thought someone was being mugged till it continued with How many times do I have to tell you not to go near grandad?

Could you please take a photo of the abscess on my behind so I can send it to the doctor?

The upside was I had antibiotics within the hour of them receiving it. The downside - I hope it isn't on the office noticeboard!

I'll phone you back later. I have a click and collect slot at the supermarket.

And use the soap......Let me smell your hands now.

I wonder if little ones are quite relieved that they can't be kissed by some older relatives.
I used to hate it when a great uncle with a moustache said.
"Have you a kiss for your old nunky.?"
I would love to have said "no"

Never expected to hear my husband yell, "Don't touch it until I have disinfected it!"

Sadly, just in reference to a parcel...

MawB2

I wonder what FH is going to wear to her party which may or may not of course happen, in 8 months time.

I think I may go for a rib knit dress with very very thin straps, over a white tshirt, I saw a perfect one in the summer. I hope it's back in stock in time for the party. X

Ooh, nice mask!

"It's lovely to see you in the flesh"
Me to the Zumba Gold (female) instructor back in live classes after months of lockdown video classes (which were brilliant but just not the same as doing it live)

Being asked what I was going into a building society for

“You can only come to church if you phone up and prebook your seat. Otherwise you’ll have to watch it on Zoom”

"Mum has just WhatsApped me again."

(Mum being an 87 year old whose computer skills were, and still are, virtually non-existent!)

Will do what I want when I want to do it (with mask on)

That's the plan, Boris willing.....

Have you washed your hands? (after taking in post, shopping, milk and parcels)

Which bag did I put my masks, plastic bag and hand sanitiser in?

Matelda Me too! Aren’t they good?

"We go to the live streamed Mass on Sunday."
Later on, "We need to book our seats for the public Mass on Sunday."

Specialist nurse: "Don't come anywhere near the hospital if you can possibly avoid it."

It's impossible to get any flour at all.

Don’t throw that black mouldy banana away, I can make some banana bread with it.

I think I'll bake a cake, something I haven't done for years. must look for some flour/butter/eggs/bread/toilet rolls when I go shopping.

How early can I go shopping to avoid the queues?

Unprecedented pandemic

Making a booking for a seat in Church!

Mmm, this chickpea flour pastry is actually quite tasty.....

Who put the milk bottles in the fridge without washing them first?