Sending a Hug to the Keyboard Warriors

Well said Notinthemanual...

It also occurred to me that they might just need to up their fluid and vegetable intake.

That made me actually laugh aloud, Notinthe manual!

made me chuckle Notinthemanual unfortunately said people see themselves as superior beings.
The voluntary organisation I belong to suffered badly at the hands of two keyboard warriors a few years ago. We never really recovered as a group, quite sad.

Well said Notinthemanual !

Notinthemanual

Notinthemanual, a very thoughtful post and interesting post.

However, for some of the keyboard warriors, a hug would make no difference. There are posters on this forum, whose sole desire, in my opinion, is to hurt others, without considering the effect on the mental and emotional well being of their victim. ?
It's cowardly, because they probably wouldn't have the nerve to do it, face to face in real life.
Sorry to sound so negative.

Thank you Notinthemanual for such a well considered and interesting post.

I am with Marydoll on this, though. I'm afraid I would struggle to be generous enough to give a hug to any of these nasty, self-righteous and bitter keyboard warriors. They do cause real pain - sufficient pain to cause long established and well loved grans to leave Gransnet.

No, sorry, I cannot find it in myself to feel kindly towards them, certainly not to send them love.

Yes, we all know who they are. They did upset me at first but now I just think, do you know what? I’m so glad that I haven’t turned out to be a nasty OLD so and so who loves upsetting people.
The sad thing is that a lot of them don’t even recognise themselves or the hurt that they cause others.
Please just IGNORE them - they are absolutely not worth a second thought.

If people didn’t leave. If instead every time someone posted something nasty we said “oh you poor thing. You must be having a bad day. Have a big hug” would that not defeat their object?

Just me that finds this a little bit patronising and superior then? In the vein of "lets all laugh at those nasty people who aren't like us?" Full of indirect nastiness because nobody is named?

Some people are downright cruel on this forum, no question, but there's different ways of being unpleasant to people. For instance pretending to "send them a hug" when you are really making fun of them.

OK then, I'll be off to find some veggies to eat, maybe that's where I've been going wrong in life.

I don’t often post on here but do tend to read lots of the threads. I’m often amazed at how nasty some posters can be. Sad really. I know not everybody can agree and we will often have different opinions but there is never any excuse for being rude, unkind or downright nasty.

I'm relatively new on GN. I have noticed over a period of time that some individuals seem to deliberately seek out others to criticise and pick at simply for their point of view!

The original post might have been a general enquiry on a subject, a member has passed comment that some of these "bullies" don't agree with and the post then becomes a battle ground to undermine and pass derogatory comments to that member!

Just who do these vile individuals think they are! Clearly, they have NEVER undergone diversity training!

On the whole though, this is a great site with many very helpful and kind people who share their knowledge without being over critical.

Just me that finds this a little bit patronising and superior then

No, I'm with you, Alegrias.

I'm sure the OP has the best of intentions but it smacks of thought police for me.

I agree Poppyred as soon as certain names pop up you know that unpleasantness will soon follow. Some people regrettably seem to feel that the only way to express their own opinion is to ridicule that of others. Maybe it helps their self esteem to vent on this platform. As a relatively new member I have noticed a certain resentment directed at those who have obviously been posting for a considerable time, it’s sad really. However I agree that they are not worth a second thought, and thank goodness we do not have to come across them in real life, although without a keyboard to hide behind maybe they are totally different.

But this thread isnt kind either its criticising people without naming them.

In Real Life - If I saw one of those "horrible" people walking down the road, I'd cross the road to avoid them.

Whilst I appreciate what Notinthemanual is saying, and I agree to some extent, I have to say that I think Marydoll is probably right. There most definitely is a hard-core of posters who seem to derive great satisfaction from posting snarky, bitchy little comments which, to them, are probably seen as being "realistic" or "not sugar coated". But to the person the comment is aimed at, it's received as being hurtful, personal and judgemental. Most normal people would immediately apologise when they've been made aware that they have hurt or upset someone, whether intentionally or not, but not these..... they add more and more self justifying posts. I have noticed that this is often worse later into the evening and I've wondered if skews their thinking.

Alegrias2 patronising and superior? No.

Gransnet has become a very different place recently. I and many others who have been hurt and upset by those who seem to assume intellectual superiority and don't think twice about putting others down. Unfortunately there are many of us who now look in from time to time but post only infrequently. At a time when many of us are struggling, a forum such as this could be a place of friendship. But it really, really isn't.

I’m sorry to say but I get really annoyed with “certain posters”. And “we all know who they are”. I’m not sure I do.

We’ve had threads like this many times and of course they are well meant but whenever I’ve seen unkind posts they’re usually followed by supportive comebacks from other posters.? Plus of course we can just report really offensive posts.

The fly swatter is a great analogy Notinthe manual and I have been batted under the mesh a few times. I admit I can sometimes be a prickly little midge with some of my replies to a particular comment, but I am neither a dirty, unkind bluebottle nor a nasty stinging wasp.
Just on another thread today someone else jokingly described unpleasant posters as spiders lurking ready to "have a go". So by that analogy we are all part of the same species after all! (But by golly she was completely squished to smithereens by the swatter too. Ouch!)
I know it is only a couple of posters who seem to dislike my buzz, but I have a tube of anthisan to keep me upbeat, and I will
continue to hover. Let's try to inject a bit of humour not venom.

Alegrias2 you have summed up pretty well how I feel about this.

Although I agree that there is a certain amount of nastiness at times on GN I do feel for instance that the accusation of ‘bullying’ is banded about too much.

Feelings do run high, especially on some topics, but on the other hand, wouldn’t too much sweetness and light just lead to very bland discussions?

Give someone who insults us a virtual hug you are asking??

Who was it who said “hug a hoodie” ?!!!

Thank you MaizieD. I hope Alegrias2 takes your point about thought police. She seems to think she knows I have thoughts I'm not expressing.
I am sincere about sending love. I don't think I'm the first person ever to suggest neutralising negativity with kindness. As for me not naming and shaming, I didn't need to did?

wouldn’t too much sweetness and light just lead to very bland discussions?

There is a point, somewhere in the middle, between snarky, pointed jibes and "sweetness and light". I think it's called respect for others that you may disagree with.

JenniferEccles

Alegrias2 you have summed up pretty well how I feel about this.

Although I agree that there is a certain amount of nastiness at times on GN I do feel for instance that the accusation of ‘bullying’ is banded about too much.

Feelings do run high, especially on some topics, but on the other hand, wouldn’t too much sweetness and light just lead to very bland discussions?

Give someone who insults us a virtual hug you are asking??

Who was it who said “hug a hoodie” ?!!!

Good heavens to Murgatroyd (as my father used to say) I agree with you !!!