Do you think 4 children is a ‘big family?’

Yes, I think 4 is a big family these days, 2 or 3 seems to be the norm.
I am the youngest of 7 siblings, and DH is one of 4.
We have 3 sons, perhaps hoping the 3rd might be a girl, but no regrets.
We have 1 DGD and 1 DGS with our oldest, and 1 due next month with our middle son. Our 1st DIL is an only child and I think felt lonely sometimes growing up, which is probably why she wanted to have more.
It is good to have siblings with whom to share the joys and sorrows of life.

I am an only child and would have loved lots of brothers and sisters. I am very envious of big families.

I suppose that nowadays having 4 children in the UK would be perceived as a ‘large’ family.

I had ten siblings (split family so some half-brothers/sisters), however we have only produced 23 children between us. My own contribution was 5, but with a 19 year age gap between the oldest and youngest. I have 9 grandchildren, so none of mine have gone on to have big families, but the singletons meet up with cousins often enough that my two year old granddaughter always includes her four year old cousin when she draws her ‘family’. ?

I'm one of three, I have two children as do my brother and sister. My DD has three children, my son none. My DH is one if six, his father was one of fourteen and his mother one of six, strangely his mother was the only one to have children. DH has three, his son has one boy and his older DD has two girls , his younger DD is expecting a girl in November.

I think it depends on the size of family that you grew up in. We were both from three-child families - so having four didn't seem a 'big family' to us.

I think three is big and four is very large. Five or six is unimaginable to me.

I don’t believe so very many women actually wanted more than 2 or 3 babies. Catholic doctrine aside, effective contraception has been the game changer for most.

I'm one of four! I think it is just about right. I always wanted 4 but it was not to be but feel blessed to have my 2 DC.
To me 6+ is a large family.

I've got four. Nice amount. Larger family than average but worked well for us.

I do think 4 is a big family by today's standards, however I'm mindful my husband had 4, including our two! Children and how many individuals decide to have, or don't have is highly personal in the way religious and political beliefs are imo. I imagine most parents of larger families have given the matter much consideration.

Granmarderby10

I don’t believe so very many women actually wanted more than 2 or 3 babies. Catholic doctrine aside, effective contraception has been the game changer for most.

Well, I certainly wanted lots!

I think it’s lovely to have four children as long as you can afford it, I think five is a big family, my husband is one of seven, I’m one of three

kittylester, I think the point is choice. Maybe some did want a big family, maybe some didn't. Unfortunately, until relatively recent, for many, it wasn't their choice. Thankfully we do now have that.

Contraception has been a game changer for most catholics as well.

kittylester

Granmarderby10

I don’t believe so very many women actually wanted more than 2 or 3 babies. Catholic doctrine aside, effective contraception has been the game changer for most.

Well, I certainly wanted lots!

would you really have wanted 17 though? (which I think was the highest number on this thread) or double figures? if I'd have relied on no contraception, I'd have had one a year and would have died very young. I think if you choose to have a 'big' family with access to medicine and healthcare it is completely different

I think four is a big family in the UK these days. DH and I decided on two because we were concerned about overpopulation, and that was in the sixties!
I agree with MOnica on that subject.

Blondiescot with the age of many first-time parents increasing (in the West) and levels of fertility decreasing I’m afraid the choice to have children at all is diminished for some.

i knew somebody that was the youngest of 19 , 17 surviving. The only reason the family did not get any larger was because her dad died when she was a baby.

My mom was one of 5 and my dad one of 6. My maternal grandmother had terrible bladder issues due to the pregnancies but the Dr would not send her for treatment ( he had very old fashioned views) in case she wanted more!

I was at school with a girl who was one of fourteen. Her oldest brothers were in the army and they had children themselves who were older than the youngest siblings!

My mum’s friend had eight children, seven girls and one boy, who was the sixth or seventh child. The parents had just wanted a large family and money was no object so they had eight babies. The parents are dead now, as is one child, and sadly the remaining seven are riven by arguments and estrangements.

I remember my mum saying she was sure her mum didn’t want 12 children but ‘she had no choice’ - that’s so sad.

Eldest of two, always wanted the big happy family didnt happen due to difficult pregnancies.
I mop up all the sad,looking for family kids,and mother them,as well as my DGD from my deceased daughter

We just had 2 (thank goodness as too many people in world) DH is one of 4. I’m 1 of 2. Mum was from family of 8 and dad from family of 13. DD has 3 (hopefully no more) and other D has 0.

I'm he eldest of 4, born in 1947. My mum was one of 4 and my dad an only child. My DH's parents both came from large families - 9 children in one and 7 in the other.

My paternal GN thought my parents were wrong having 4 (all born before they reached 30) My siblings and I didn't get on too well once I'd and my eldest brother reached our teens and I have no contact with my two brothers.

I do feel sorry for all those poor women who had such large families. The lives of most of them cannot have have been that good.

I had 4 children. 2 had 2 children each and the other 2 had 1 each.
I think 4 children would be considered s big family these days.