Why are we so b****y polite?

What has politeness got to do with not asking them to move their bags? You just walk up to people and with a smile ask them to move their bag off the seat

I do it all the time on trains.

I'd ask them politely to move their bags. If they refused or simply didn't respond then I'd put the bags on the floor.

I asked on a crowded train once and was told “there’s nowhere to put it” so I replied with “right well I’ll have to sit on it” and went to sit down. It was moved onto his lap with lightening speed and smirks from those nearby!

Scribbles

I'd ask them politely to move their bags. If they refused or simply didn't respond then I'd put the bags on the floor.

This- I did the very same on Saturday at Lisbon airport.

Maybe they were so deep in conversation they didn't notice that some sitting on the floor or standing might have liked a seat. Prior to Covid, I've both had and observed occasions on trains where people have set up their personal office and had a good old hurrumph when asked if they could make way for an actual paying person

NannyJan53

This happens on buses often too. I have seen people politely ask someone to move their bag so they could sit down. The 'offender' usually looks quite surprised.

I boarded a bus recently with Mum (93) it was full mainly of school children. Not one offered her a seat. Then a man got up and offered her his seat. I said in a loud voice, 'Mum this gentleman has offered you his seat' Not a flicker from any of the other passengers as they were all engrossed on their phones. I stood all the way to town!

I probably look fine, and on a bus I have had older people glare at me for not giving up my seat, but I suffer from extreme dizzy spells snd black outs and cannot stand long. Not all disabilities are visable

On a train recently I asked a young lady why she didn't ask the nearby person to move their things so that she could sit down. This was a longish journey and the aisle was packed with standing passengers. She gave a helpless look as if to say this is normal. I didn't feel it was my place to ask for her but felt frustrated at her acceptance of the situation. Needless to say the offending passenger just ignored all those standing.

Calendargirl

Urmstongran

I think a lot of people are behaving ‘Covid averse’. They put their bags on seats to discourage others getting too close.

That excuse doesn’t apply anymore, and is just a cop out.

Of course people shouldn’t have bags (or dogs) on seats whilst paying passengers stand.

As for offering seats to the public, not only were we expected to do that as a matter of course back in the 60’s, we lowly first formers were also expected to give up our seats so the sixth formers could sit down.

I totally agree. It was just my observation.
Mind you Covid is on the rise again and so .... 😊

When I found someone sitting in my pre-booked seat recently on a packed train, she said she’d had to sit there because the woman across the aisle was sitting in her (table) seat, where she’d set her office up nicely with laptop, phone and files spread around.

I stood between them and made it clear (politely) that one of them would have to move as I had no intention of standing for 90 minutes. The laptop was slammed shut, files shoved into a bag, and one very disgruntled woman shoved past me in search of another seat to pinch.

What irked me was that the woman in my seat was obviously too polite (or scared) to ask an important captain of industry to move, but wasn’t at all worried about staying put when asked to move by a mild looking pensioner.

jenpax

NannyJan53

This happens on buses often too. I have seen people politely ask someone to move their bag so they could sit down. The 'offender' usually looks quite surprised.

I boarded a bus recently with Mum (93) it was full mainly of school children. Not one offered her a seat. Then a man got up and offered her his seat. I said in a loud voice, 'Mum this gentleman has offered you his seat' Not a flicker from any of the other passengers as they were all engrossed on their phones. I stood all the way to town!

I probably look fine, and on a bus I have had older people glare at me for not giving up my seat, but I suffer from extreme dizzy spells snd black outs and cannot stand long. Not all disabilities are visable

This was a bus full of school age teenagers!

I was on a busy train at the start of a 90 minute journey. Two chaps were sitting at a table for four with laptops bags etc spread out. I asked them to move their bags and was told " there are other seats!" I went elsewhere as I did not want to spend the journey in their company.
Ten minutes later, at the next stop, a group of young women joined the train. Two of them moved the bags and sat next to the grumpy guys, ignoring eye rolls, sighs etc; Their friends spread out in other seats.The group then used the table as their base to eat, drink fizz, do full makeup and hair, take lots of selfies, all accompanied by lots of happy screams.
I enjoyed it all very much...

Slightly amusing train story. I had a booked seat on the Manchester-Oxford train. No one had nicked my seat so all was well. However it was packed and an elderly couple sat opposite me. It was a 3-hour trip so I had a packed lunch which included a bottle of sparkling water. I took the cap off and liberally sprayed, in fact drenched, the couple in front of me. As I apologised profusely and handed over tissues, they didn’t say a word, just sat there dripping.

I just dont understand...
1. Why your husband , OP, said "No" to asking
2. Why you listened to him
3. What the connection between politeness and asking for bags to be moved is!

"Excuse me, please could you move your bag as I need to sit down!"

Bag moved ..."Thanks so much!" All with a smile!

Bag not moved ..."Sorry but I have no choice as I HAVE to sit down!" Move the bag, pass to them or put on floor and sit down! All with a friendly smile

Any complaints ...Repeat .." I have to sit down so it is the only solution for me! Thanks so much! "

But to be honest I really think the majority of people would move the bag when pointed out to them!

The worst I have experienced is the bag being moved, but grudgingly or grumpily.

Bags must always have their own seat.

Or so it seems 🤣🤣🤣

I put my had on the bag and say, do you mind if I move this.
It changes the dynamics completely.

I would have asked them to move their bags so I could have the seat I had paid for like them. They were allowed to be rude and inconsiderate.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

silly me, I've requested deletion.

I laugh - Mum used to say (stage whisper) 'People are looking!' - this being the worst that could happen - Now people are brought up to make sure that 'People are looking' as much and as often as possible - Yup - ask for that seat - if they mind for a sensible reason, you will know - if not maybe you will sit down.

Oh I would have just said excuse me can you move your bag. And if they ignored me i would have put my bum on the edge and slowly pushed the bag with my bum there would have moved it in time. I’m always doing if on a train etc do you mind moving your bag can give as many dirty looks as they want. Then I thank them afterwards lol

we are too polite, it is true. My husband would also moan but also say not to say anything!

How was Oslo?

A seat occupied on a bus, train by a bag, I'd be asking if the item paid a fare for the seat! At the airport I've noticed bags take up a lot of seats. If struggling I'd try to get staff involved to get one cleared or ask if the seat is being used by a passenger just in case they've nipped to the loo and using the bag to keep their seat. It's all this me, me, me attitude these days.

I heard of a woman with one of those reborn dolls in a buggy. She insisted on parking her buggy in the space on the bus. A woman with a real baby and buggy had nowhere to park her buggy!

Urmstongran

I think a lot of people are behaving ‘Covid averse’. They put their bags on seats to discourage others getting too close.

No my son and I had a problem on National Express. We got on, there were no free seats due to bags etc. Then the bus driver told us we had to sit down and I said there were no free seats. He didn’t give a shit and neither did anyone else so we were forced to ask people if we could sit next to them. This was long before Covid.