Scared of the motorway

Nannarose

Have you got time to book a session with a local driving school? DiL did this after a break from driving, when she felt she needed to get used to motorways. They will give you useful tips.

the advantages of motorway driving are:
1. you know you can take breaks
2. if you make a mistake, you can correct it - even at the worst junctions, there are ways back.

good luck

As learner drivers can't drive on motorways, it's amazing that a full driving licence can be issued without a newly qualified driver having any experience of motorway driving.

It would be a good idea for an interim licence to be issued but that at least two or three further lessons on the motorway should be mandatory before a full licence is issued.

Don’t be embarrassed. Better to be safe and drive within your capacity.
I am more comfortable driving on motorways than through unfamiliar cities. Apart from so-called smart motorways, which should be returned to proper ones with a hard shoulder.

The furthest I have driven for years is about a two hour journey. I planned it all out in advance on Google maps, studied junctions etc and used my phone for instructions. I recommend this.

I would rather take the train- if only they were reliable.

Years ago I was forced, by circumstances, to undertake a driving exercise I'd never normally have considered. The fact it had to be done, and only I could do it forced my trembling hand. It taught me so much about myself. That I am far more capable than I gave myself credit for, that I let fear restrict me unreasonably, that other's faith in me is fully justified, that to attempt that which frightens me only expands me. We most often limit ourselves, grow wings, fly. Unless you try you'll never know.

Cabbie21 I do something similar. I have Google Earth on my pc. I use it to plan journeys by putting a marker on my destination then using GE to plot the roads and motorways to get there. I go into street view on the motorways to look at the gantry signs to see which lane I need to be in and which lane on the roundabouts for my exits. As I plan the journey I write down each stage. Fortunately I have my DH with me to follow the route.
I'm going to the AO Arena in Manchester so I've planned the route there and back. One straight road in from the M60 and another road straight out back to the M60.
I'm not worried as I am 71 and done some quite long journeys. I agree that I don't agree with smart motorways.

AA Route Planner on your pc.

www.theaa.com/route-planner/route

I think you will grow in confidence as you travel.
Motorway driving does need you to be alert but given that everyone is travelling in the same direction I don't think it's as terrible as you fear.
Take a sat nav or use your mobile and you'll get plenty of warning for junctions.

Motorway accidents happen mostly when changing lanes (you or others) and when joining/leaving the traffic - so just keep eyes open.

I'm some ways I think driving alone is easier as you have no external distractions and can make your own mind up about how long you need to stop for and whether you want to go on to the next services or not...

If you are just too weary by evening, if necessary you will just have to stop at a services in the motel. Not the end of the world.

Good luck.

That's great advice NotSpaghetti. If you get too stressed, or too tired, there's usually a Travelodge or Premier Inn close to motorways, just build in the cost of a one night stay, pull off and reset after a night's break.

I haven't driven on a motorway for years. Leaving Glasgow often means using the Kingston Bridge on the motorway, which terrifies me. There are so many lanes and idiots, who cross lanes at the last minute.
Years ago I had to drive across it in the morning rush hour to attend a course near Edinburgh. (I spent the whole time praying.) My muscles were so painful the following day from tension, I took the train to the course venue!

DH dislikes driving in town, the Clyde Tunnel and multiple lanes at Anniesland Cross don't phase me, but I have to keep telling him the correct lane, so we have an arrangement, I drive in town, he the motorway.

However, I do realise that I may have to force myself to drive in an emergency.

What is it that you are actually afraid of?

I find it much more scary driving on B roads where there is nothing separating me from the oncoming traffic except a line in the road.

I live in Germany and I'd rather take the autobahn than a back road any day.

If you are already anxious and nervous before you are on the motorway, then you are a liability on it. At 76 I still enjoy driving but made the decision that motorway driving was no longer for me. It's a fast and busy environment and you need to have your wits about you at all times. In your shoes I would either plan my route avoiding motorways or better still go by train where you can relax, have a coffee, read a book or just watch the world go by. Far less stressful.

Bump

I would choose a quiet time of day or Sunday morning then plan a couple of stops on the way, taking your time does not work for me because you are amongst the trucks, So it’s 65-70mph where I can, motorways themselves are not a problem for me, but complicated junctions entering and leaving are not easy when you have impatient locals who know the layout overtaking on both sides.

There comes a time when we all loose our confidence, dont fight it, just say no and find a different solution, there always is one.

On a solo North/South journey I would have thought a long distance coach would work, and be cheaper than petrol

Motorways have never bothered me. I drive on them regularly and long distance. I find them much easier to drive on than ordinary roads, no oncoming traffic to worry about, clear signing and signalling and overtaking is so much easier when you can see the traffic behind you for minutes before you need to overtake.

The biggest mistake people make is notusing them egularly and building this big fear bubble round them.

I found after a long gap during COVID when all i did was the round trip to the supermarket, that i began to feel fearful about driving further, so I decided the only sensible thing to do was to get out and drive distances, on motorways.

We were going away for a week so I told DH we would go in my car and I would do all the driving. In that week I drove about 1,000 miles, on all roads and in all conditions. By the time we returned, told to drive from Lands End to John o' Groats, I wouldn't have batted an eyelid.

If you are scared of doing something , then the only solution is to keep doing it until you are not scared.

The motorways in Glasgow go through the city centre and are always extremely congested, so you need to think so far ahead to be in the correct lane. I have seen so many near misses.
I don't know anyone, who doesn't hate driving there.

I would probably be O.K once I was out of that part of the motorway.

Bump

Rosie51

Years ago I was forced, by circumstances, to undertake a driving exercise I'd never normally have considered. The fact it had to be done, and only I could do it forced my trembling hand. It taught me so much about myself. That I am far more capable than I gave myself credit for, that I let fear restrict me unreasonably, that other's faith in me is fully justified, that to attempt that which frightens me only expands me. We most often limit ourselves, grow wings, fly. Unless you try you'll never know.

This is so true often as we age we think “it’s not for me “ but turn it around and “why not me”.

It may be daunting but You Can Do It.

I agree mostly, but on the other hand there are, dare I say it, some drivers who should not be driving at all. Younger and older. They are a danger to themselves and others. My father was a case in point. He did not think there was a problem but my mum and sister did. An older driver who has lost confidence and is slow to react might be wise to consider whether it is time to stop driving.

I’m bucking the trend, because I really don’t see a problem.
Joining the motorway is simple - just get your speed up to that of lane 1, indicate and slip into a gap. Always drive in lane 1 except when overtaking.
I’d probably take a break on a 6 hour drive, but anything less, I’d do in one go.
Luckily, my daily driving is varied from country lanes to dual carriage ways, motorways and the City’s central motorway/bypass.
Like Cabbie21 I think an anxious driver can be a danger to themselves and other road users. A friend was told on a driving assessment that her licence was a privilege and entitled her to drive on any road and she ought to be competent enough to do so - blunt, but true.
It is wrong (IMHO) that new drivers are allowed on motorways without any practical tuition and I think after passing the driving test, an hours lesson, given by a professional, should be compulsory.
At only 62, a lot of people are still working and driving high mileages up and down motorways daily - I clocked up 62,000 miles in 3 years, taking the DDs to and from school, plus bring their social taxi!

I'm not sure in which way you are "bucking the trend".

There are lots of us who are very happy on motorways. I think many are just suggesting ways that the OP can overcome her fears.

Choose a route to the destination that avoids motorways.
It could actually be more pleasant. Take your time.

I am the same and use the route planner without motorways when planning a journey.

Granmarderby The problem is, that it rarely is more pleasant to use the non-motorway route, unless it is just 10 or 20 miles.

On several of our regular journeys, the cross country route may be shorter in miles, but is so much longer in time and hassle as we cope with traffic lights, being unable to get past very slow traffic like tractors and congestion in towns. We prefer to drive a longer route by motorway because the driving is easy and relatively hassle free and takes less time.

But to me dual carriageway/motorway driving is easier and less hassle than single carriage way roads

I started suffering from panic attacks and became terrified of motorway driving. I used to plan routes using an OS map and came across some glorious places in the middle of nowhere! Drove past Dick Turpin's cottage - was it in Essex? Can't remember. Anyway, much more fun than endless miles of tarmac.

Bump

Granmarderby10

Choose a route to the destination that avoids motorways.
It could actually be more pleasant. Take your time.

Try driving from the Midlands to Cornwall without using the Motorway, that is not a practical journey in one day, the Lake District isn’t either.

If you cant drive on the Motorway best to make other arrangements.