Tonight I lost it and just wept ....

done any better!

I’m just angry. I have been against this Tory government since it was voted in and everything I predicted would happen has. I was incredulous when planes were still flying in from China and Italy with no quarantine. I was further shocked by how long they left it before the lockdown. When we were finally in lockdown I was angry at all the deaths caused by not doing it soon enough. But they seemed to get their act together and the rate of infection slowed down. I began to feel sorry for them and angry when they were pushed to announce an exit strategy. I admired them, for sticking to their guns. It seems all it took to announce that people could return to work was the realisation that if the economy was impacted largely enough then they, too might be affected. So workers are being thrown under the bus and I am shocked, but not surprised. This is Capitalism. Please don’t tell me not to bring politics into it, because this is all about politics. Did I mention that I was angry?

Ginny thank you for that poem. It has comforted me, and I will cut and paste and send it to my dear lifelong friend who lost her husband recently and is isolating alone. She is bravely coping with overhwelming grief as well as the fears in this upside down world we have now.
I am probably an irritatingly optimistic person as I will try hard to find the upside of everything - 'have never seen any point in doing anything else - but several times lately as I try to sleep there has been a sense of real panic. My children and grandchildren, my son trying to keep his job, my daughter with her compromised health, my grandson with asthma, the innocent younger ones who will be returning to school - it just gets too much, and then I fear dying and being unable to help them ever again, and be the comforter that they can still turn to in bad times. The morning usually brings a much brighter mood, and it must be said that life has been calmer because I have stopped listening to the rolling news and having the worst of it poured into my brain 24/7.
This will pass - all things pass. Keep safe, everyone.

My son's friend is an intensive care nurse. He is working his normal hours then voluntarily working overtime. Today he finished a 12 hour night shift in ICU, only to find his bike had been stolen from the car park. This beggars belief but it may have a happy outcome. A colleague trweeted the theft and it has been taken up by a Channel 4 newscaster. Hopefully my son's friend may be donated a new bike.

I had a couple of those days last week. Tried to give myself a talking to but that just made it worse. So I had a good cry and then another. I was told yesterday by my Specialist Nurse that I am entitled to have bad days and not to be too hard on myself. I think that applies to us all. So lets cry together, get angry together, and get through this together. We are all here for each other which is a bonus.
Love the poem Ginny xx

Interesting how many of us have had a little meltdown at the same time. But being the resourceful determined ladies we are, we will dig deep and keep going for everyone else because we expect it of ourselves. We are all in the same storm, different boats , and take inspiration and fortitude from the group women who went before x

A reassuring thread, it's reassuring to know we aren't alone in finding our emotions are just below the surface. I was cleaning the kitchen yesterday, and realised I had tears rolling down my face. I was surprised but it made me connect with how vulnerable I felt. Like most others, its about missing my loved one's and the fear I keep at bay, that this is it, I'm 71 and I'll never cuddle my grandchildren again. Then I give myself a talking to and count my blessings.
It's good to know we aren't alone.

Yes, l had a phone consultation with my doctor earlier as my medication review was overdue. It was fine until l mentioned a condition l have which is ongoing but repeatedly dismissed. I said l would like to take it further when everything gets back to some sort of normal. Again l was made to feel that my concerns were unimportant exacerbating my dislike of seeing a doctor, which l do as little as possible. I was feeling a little low anyway but this made me feel quite tearful and l snapped at my husband. I have continued working from home and my husband has been back and forth to Coventry as a front line worker. I have also been clearing out the upstairs of my house. I suppose it is normal that our emotions are heightened and that we do break occasionally.

I had a meltdown when he said about school kids being able to go back i have grandkids in nursery and year 1 and my daughter's partner has kids in reception and year 1 ,my partners daughter is taking GCSEs next year and can also go back luckily my son is home tutored but that is potentially 5 members of my family at risk and it got too much for me, I cried then got angry and swore and shouted about it do I feel better for it not really but I'm coping a little better todayv

I don’t believe the death toll is correct, if a death occurs at this time it is put down to Covid 19 when it was probably due to something else.

Beautiful & much needed Ginny Thankyou.

Oh thank God I'm not the only one. I thought I was coping fine - have developed a phobia of supermarket (have to shop ourselves as only 'over 70' - no illnesses - no chance of getting slots). Stress over that has made me a wreck, then OH needs me to take him to A&E. Beyond nightmareish, then battery dead in hospital car park when he emerged. Thank God for attendant with super jump starter. Half a day with no events then washing machine packs up ! I think we need a communal wail!

Love the poem Ginny!

i so agree, before the virus we looked after our 13 year old grandaughter after school and during holidays, obviously we are not doing that, just today our daughter called, left something in the porch for us, my grandaughter was with her and although, of course, it was lovely to see her, it was a case of so near yet so far and ended up with both my daughter and myself crying, its a very emotional time and even though i know its not permanent and we could be so much worse off i try to think positively , at least we dont get unwelcome visitors

My way of coping don't read the news it is full of fear and panic. Nobody knows what is true or not anymore so I just don't listen. I listen to Ken on Radio 2 but as soon as Jeremy comes off I switch off or go to capital gold. Fear is worse than the real so I switch off!

We all feel like this from time to time. Its natural as we are not living in a normal world. My mum who is 87 and lives alone had a very bad weepy day on monday and she went to bed at 6pm because she couldn't wait to end the day. As a family we make sure she has everything she needs, shopping deliveries etc but what she really needs is to see someone, make them a cup of tea, spend time chatting etc, and of course a big hug. Its so frustrating not to be able to go and visit her. I worry about her a lot.

I’m sorry but some of you really need to give yourselves a good talking to. There are MILLIONS of people in the world far worse off than any of us. If you had no food, no income, no clean water, living in a camp while bombs rained down etc etc you might be entitled to the odd bout of “woe is me” but strangely, people in these circumstances just stiffen their backboneS and get on with it.

Not helpful to try and guilt trip people about refugees, this is not the subject under discussion.

Quite agree harrigran different issue.

Yes tidy we know that but we can’t do anything about it. We feel for them too so now I’m even more depressed. Thanks.

Last week I visited our local nature reserve and cried behind my sunglasses! Like most of you, I enjoyed my life... trips to the coast, days out, going to the pub, visits to NT properties, seeing my lovely children and grandchild. Simple pleasures generally. Now I have good days and wobbly days.
Lovely poem, ginny.

I suddenly feel really scared for my little granddaughter who is 5 and Year 1. She is loving being at home with Daddy who is working from home and Mummy, a nurse who is not allowed to work as she's pregnant. Just settling back into school will be hard enough but not able to mix properly with her friends and teachers will really upset her. Add to this the danger of her bringing the infection home to her Mum it's so horrible.

Does she have to go to school, BoBo? The government say they won't prosecute people who don't send their children to school. I can understand your concern.

I think there will be many children who will not be returning to school BoBo
Even if they do open, as I understand Teachers' Unions are discussing this.

That being said, children of key workers such as medical staff have been going to school all the way through this.

Thank you for remembering that Callistemon.