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Would you do this?

(96 Posts)
FannyCornforth Sun 09-May-21 10:10:23

Hello Everyone
I'm not sure why I'm asking, because it's going to happen anyway...?

Neighbour, who is in his 80s, has asked DH to give him a lift to the hospital. DH will wait for him, and bring him home.

Neighbour will have had both vaccines I'm sure; DH has had one and has also had Covid (despite shielding).

Neighbour actually asked me and I said yes, it was fine. I honestly didn't think of the Covid risk at the time.
DH is absolutely fine about.
Windows will be open and I will ask him to wear a mask.

What would you have done?
Thank you

FannyCornforth Sun 09-May-21 14:20:34

Thank you everyone
Jaxjacky if my leg hadn't spectacularly gone to pot, he'd be living with a secondary school teacher and all that entails.
The Lord truly does work in mysterious ways.
I don't know how we would have coped.
I honestly think that I would have had a nervous breakdown.

Callistemon Sun 09-May-21 14:27:26


I would have apologised and said no...
Neighbour should get a taxi. Your husband is very vulnerable having had covid already. should cancel and say he cannot do it.

Is he more or less vulnerable?

The neighbour has had both vaccinations and your DH should have antibodies so possibly ok but what is it like in your area and at that hospital?

Someone asked my DH to fetch her husband from a hospital stay at the height of the pandemic and before vaccines. He said yes but I rang back and said no, he couldn't. I felt awful but still think it was the right thing to do at that time.

Callistemon Sun 09-May-21 14:30:16

Windows will be open and I will ask him to wear a mask.

Give him a mask for the neighbour too and make him sit in the back.

FannyCornforth Sun 09-May-21 14:31:09

Hello Callistemon
DH has had his first vaccination.
The hospital is a small specialist one.
DH himself is backwards and forwards to a massive hospital.
Other than that, we go nowhere.

Callistemon Sun 09-May-21 14:34:15

It's his decision.

Although I interfered when DH was asked but it was last year and I think he was glad I did.

Greeneyedgirl Sun 09-May-21 14:46:48

Your husband sounds a kind person FannyC. Risk seems low to me, your neighbour & DH will hopefully have a reasonable level of immunity, and will presumably only be in the car for a limited amount of time, with air circulating and masks on. I would do the same.

grandtanteJE65 Mon 10-May-21 11:43:31

My good friend and neigbour had driven me to various hospital appointments throughout lockdown. She remains in her car while I am in the outpatients'.

If we leave the car we both put on a mask, but we do not wear them in her car. Legally, we are only obliged to do so in public transport.

If she had not been prepared to drive me to these appointments, all of which are 35 km from my home, I should have had to travel by four different buses to get there and back, spending an hour and a half each way in buses with about 15 total strangers.

Instead I spent half-an -hour each way with one person, knowing that both of us had tested negative within the previous 24 hours.

coastalgran Mon 10-May-21 11:44:02

If someone is willing to do something then it is their decision, they have weighed up the situation and given their decision. The risk is probably reduced due to vaccination and people need to return to tasks and life in general. Also although we have spouses/partners we are all adults responsible for our own actions we are not the keepers of each other.

Nannan2 Mon 10-May-21 11:51:04

There is of course a hospital transport service- I'm sure if your neighbour asked he might be eligible for that? (Sometimes its ambulance bus, sometimes a private volunteers car, etc. But I'm sure in these times they're cleaned regularly and have PPE, and regular covid tests- he could always ask?? Just to be on safer side- if your Hubby still wants to do it- maybe you could order some lateral flow tests for your hubby& neighbour to do before and after hosp visit? You too maybe just to be sure? You can order online& get them sent to you.?

Nannan2 Mon 10-May-21 11:55:01

I guess it also depends on your relationship anyway with your neighbour- you could already be good friends and maybe even in each others 'bubble' of course, so probably considered safe as it can be.

B9exchange Mon 10-May-21 11:59:50

Your DH sounds lovely Fanny and he will be glad if the opportunity to help someone else, we all need to be of service. At the height if the pandemic a friend asked if I would take him to a cataract appointment, as someone who had already agreed to had let him down. I was pleased to have the opportunity to help out. Yesterday's sermon was about love and laying down you life for your friends, this was just a very minimal risk! ?

In six weeks time all restrictions will be lifted, and I can't wait to resume a normal life smile

H1954 Mon 10-May-21 12:15:21

I would have done the same. If OH couldn't help due to other commitments I would take the neighbour.

It's not unreasonable to ask any passenger to wear a mask and also to sit in the back seat diagonally across from the driver.

4allweknow Mon 10-May-21 12:15:23

I have a nearly 90 year old friend who travels on buses and in taxis and finds no problem. Dh and neighbour both wear a mask, neighbour in opposing back seat, hand sanitizer for both before getting in car, (passenger should use again on return from appointment) windows open. Should be fine.

Lulubelle500 Mon 10-May-21 12:19:34

I think it's the thought of being in a car at such close quarters to another person. My sister is keen for me and DH to go and spend a weekend with her, taking my brother and sister in law who don't drive. We've all had both jabs so it's irrational for me to be doubtful. But it's a two hour drive, mostly motorways so leaving windows open wouldn't be possible. I'm also reluctant to go to my dentist yet, (mad really! but he and the hygienist would be really close for at least a half hour.)

polnan Mon 10-May-21 12:27:32

A friend offered to take me to my first vaccine in his car. he had not had any vaccine... I sat in the back, windows open, and I understand he "cleaned" his car afterwards... we are both fine,, now I had my second one, still fine as is he with only his first vaccine...

I was so grateful that he offered as I have difficulty asking for help of any sort!

aren`t we going to be released more and allowed to hug in 7/6 days time...? I wonder if the virus understands that until 7/6 days it is still allowed! just me being silly.

Aepgirl Mon 10-May-21 12:39:56

Exactly as Chestnut says.

grannysyb Mon 10-May-21 12:44:15

Next week I'm picking up my sewing teacher after her blood test at the hospital and then going back to her house and having my lesson. We have both had two vaccinations.

Theoddbird Mon 10-May-21 12:54:38

I would have done it.. no problem.

JaneJudge Mon 10-May-21 13:01:03

My Mother in law has been in two different hospitals the last few months (I think I have mentioned this grin ) and despite being poorly, in her 80s, having only one vaccine STILL hasn't caught covid <touches wood> the advice we are told to follow when I take my daughter to college (not in my household) is to wear a mask each and open windows and I have been doing that for months now

I'm sure it will be absolutely fine you know x

Chardy Mon 10-May-21 13:13:40

I did take a friend for a hospital appt last year. I had the car interior cleaned beforehand, she sat as far away as possible from me in my little car, both of us masked with open windows for a round trip of 50 miles.

MerylStreep Mon 10-May-21 13:16:37

I wouldn’t think twice. He’s a poor old fella who needs a favour.

Supernan Mon 10-May-21 13:29:34

I would have done the same as you.

Babs758 Mon 10-May-21 13:40:00

My lovely neighbour is a taxi driver and has also volunteered to ferry people to hospital. He has had no problems and, as far as he is aware, neither have his passengers. He wears a mask and so do they.. But if your husband has been poorly with Covid you do need to take this into account even if the risk is low.

Yorki Mon 10-May-21 13:41:49

Fanny Cornforth.. I would give this chap a lift , no problem , we're coming out of lockdown anyway...

nipsmum Mon 10-May-21 13:46:48

Are you worried because of risk of Covid?? We will all get back to more normal conditions. Maybe you are over thinking a problem that doesn't exist. If he has an appointment to go to, they are not to worried about how an 80 year old will get there, or if he might have Covid.