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What else can I do for my daughter to want me in her life

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Panda220 Fri 31-Jan-20 10:53:08

I've always been there for my children, I put their needs first and I had a close relationship with my eldest daughter. Then she was getting married and it all fell apart. She argued with her younger sister, but because I didn't pick a side we became a bit strained leading up to the wedding. After trying to reason with her as she and her husband to be banned my other daughter from the wedding, she then told me she wasn't bothered if I was even there or not. I still went but it was the worst day. I looked after her two children for the duration of her honeymoon, then that's it. No contact for the next 3 years. I was heartbroken. Finally contact was made but even after still trying hard and still taking crap things have again become tense. I don't want to lose my grandchildren again but I feel I'm at the end of my tether and feel anxious all the time. She treats me like I just don't matter to her but expects me to see the kids often, although I am banned from her house by her husband, so I try and take them out but three children cost loads to keep occupied and fed. They have broken stuff at my home so my husband won't have them here anymore. How on earth does this get resolved? Advice would be very much appreciated

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Smileless2012 Wed 08-Apr-20 14:11:55

Hello elena. I think to say that "some are just reading between the lines and not fully understanding" is a very measured response in light of some of the comments that have been made here.

Am I right that your D has in fact accused her brother of abusing his own D as well as your H, her step father of abusing your GC and his own D's?

It certainly looks as if your D has some serious issues, highlighted by her belief that there's been a conspiracy to "bury her complaint".

I hope for all your sake that she'll be able at some point to receive the help she needs.

flowers.

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LeeElizabeth Fri 12-Jun-20 23:55:19

My daughter says I do too much for her but then always asks me to bail her out. We are now staying away from each other because presently that's all we can do.

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Smileless2012 Sat 13-Jun-20 09:57:38

You posted on another thread that your D has moved out following an argument and that despite having apologised and asked for her forgiveness, she's refusing to talk to you LeeElizabeth.

Was the argument over something you refused to bail her ou of?

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Smileless2012 Sat 13-Jun-20 09:57:59

should have been 'out of'.

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Fuchsiarose Mon 28-Sept-20 23:51:25

Dear panda. Personally I would inform dear H that he can get his own lunch or dinner as he seems to make a stressful situation worse. I would also tell Dd and SIL that if they want a babysitter for grandkids then I am coming to your house where you will be tidying up long after I had a fun day with grandkids which costs me nothing. I would then go home and put my feet up with a glass of wine or other drink of choice. Be assertive panda.xx

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