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Estrangement

Broken hearted at estrangement

(64 Posts)
00opsidia Mon 07-Oct-24 15:45:44

Not looking for sympathy and don't have energy to write much. Am in Heart failure.

Think is caused by heart break. Reseacrh suggests this is true. Estrangement is cruel. I hope they are happy with themselves when they turn round one day and I'm not here anymore.

What do these cruel kids expect to happen?

Nana56 Mon 07-Oct-24 15:52:32

I've just read your message and had to send you hugs .
Thinking of you and hoping the situation improves flowers

DiamondLily Mon 07-Oct-24 16:07:49

I don’t think many ACs think that far. You might like to go on the support thread, where you can get support. Best wishes. πŸ’

Babs03 Mon 07-Oct-24 16:11:06

So sorry. I know you have struggled with this before. The support thread is a good place to go for the help you need right now.
Hope to see you there. Sending hugs πŸ€—

V3ra Mon 07-Oct-24 16:13:44

00opsidia I'm so sorry you're in this heartbreaking position.
Sadly you're not alone as other people on here will tell.

Smileless2012 Mon 07-Oct-24 19:58:12

Hello 00opsidia I can feel the anguish in your post so please believe me when I say that you are not alone, that there are posters here who know exactly what you're going through because we've been there too.

Yes, research shows that this type of emotional trauma can result in damage to the heart. A doctor in Australia who saw my husband when we were there called it 'sad heart syndrome'.

Please take a look at the support thread on this forum where you will find understanding, support and friendship from other parents who have been estranged flowers.

Babs03 Mon 07-Oct-24 20:21:14

Hope you are still reading this, concerned about your well being right now, the pain caused by estrangement can result in physical and psychological trauma. I suffered a breakdown, took me years to recover but am still nothing like my previous self.
You may not be looking for sympathy but right now you probably need it more than you think, as well as the love of those close to you who are not your ACs.
Those who have suffered like you are with you right now.
Take care and get back to us πŸ™πŸΎ

Whiff Mon 07-Oct-24 22:43:43

Sorry you have heart failure hopefully they will find the cause and put you on the right medication. But the stress of estrangement takes it's toll on our minds and body.. As others have said look at the support thread you are not alone if it wasn't for their help I wouldn't have coped when it it first happened to me ..
πŸ’

Esmay Tue 08-Oct-24 04:12:27

Sending you lots of hugs .🐻
Love
Esmay
Xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Redhead56 Tue 08-Oct-24 09:52:20

So very sorry honestly as a mum I truly feel your pain I really do. Look after yourself the best as you can under these difficult circumstances πŸ’πŸ’

Allsorts Fri 11-Oct-24 07:13:05

I know exactly how you feel, my heart broke too, all that has had this happen to them feel the same .we keep going some how, especially if you've a loved one or other family, you go through the motion's, then you just have to let the sunshine back in, no matter how hard it is. You act the part and gradually you have a different life to the one you thought you would have.only you can do this. Its happened, cant alter it so concentrate on getting the best life you can for you. I don't think they think of us because if they did they would try to repair the relationship,πŸ’

Cossy Fri 11-Oct-24 07:16:05

I too join fellow GNs in sending much love and hoping you’ll let us all know you’re managing flowers

00opsidia Mon 14-Oct-24 17:58:14

Thankyou all flowers

I know I'm not the only one to have Sad Heart Syndrome and other health problems caused by emotional suffering. I created the post because it's where I am right now and I didn't think of trawling through old posts on GN to see if anyone had written about it before. Even if they had, someone would surely have said "You're commenting on an old post".

Sending my best wishes to all survivors. flowers

Babs03 Mon 14-Oct-24 20:11:01

00opsidia

Thankyou all flowers

I know I'm not the only one to have Sad Heart Syndrome and other health problems caused by emotional suffering. I created the post because it's where I am right now and I didn't think of trawling through old posts on GN to see if anyone had written about it before. Even if they had, someone would surely have said "You're commenting on an old post".

Sending my best wishes to all survivors. flowers

All the best to you 🌹
Hoping you manage to reach calmer waters soon. Make sure you stay away from the source of your ill health and give yourself time to rest.
Xx

Smileless2012 Mon 14-Oct-24 20:18:43

You did the right thing creating this thread 00psidia. This is where you are right now and for now this is what you need to be focusing on.

Those calmer waters that Babs mentioned are out there, ready and waiting for you when you're ready flowers x

crazyH Mon 14-Oct-24 20:23:38

Thinking of you Ooopsidia - flowers

Shelflife Mon 14-Oct-24 23:01:10

I can only imagine how distressed you are. I sincerely hope you are able to find some peace and solace from posting on here. The only thing I can ' say' ( and please forget me if I am being insensitive) is put yourself first , self preservation comes to mind. We all have only one life and what time we have left is not for spending on a fruitless situation. Your health is so important!!! Please make yourself a priority, no amount of grieving will change things - but the stress you are under has and will continue to be detremental if you don't make a conscious move to improve your life. I send you strength , (((( hugs,)))) and πŸ’. Please get as much support as you can , try and find appropriate counselling - look to the future and remember you are so important and deserve peace - do what is necessary to make that happen. I wish you happiness.

00opsidia Mon 21-Oct-24 19:35:27

Thankyou all. I have not seen or heard from "the source" for quite some time now.

Life is more peaceful. Thankyou flowers I'm not ready to keel over yet.

Babs03 Mon 21-Oct-24 19:41:20

00opsidia

Thankyou all. I have not seen or heard from "the source" for quite some time now.

Life is more peaceful. Thankyou flowers I'm not ready to keel over yet.

Good to hear it.
Enjoy the peace and keep well.
xx

00opsidia Mon 21-Oct-24 19:50:32

Thankyou, you too Babs03 xx

Smileless2012 Mon 21-Oct-24 20:36:05

Sometimes that silence that once caused so much pain, can be golden 00opsodia*. Stay strong flowers xx

00opsidia Mon 21-Oct-24 22:40:50

Yes, it's starting to be that way Smileless. I have put up with too much. Always been too accomodating.

They say don't jump over the sea for someone who wouldn't jump over a puddle for you. I am just quietly realising who is for me, who isn't- and who never was. Not just EC. There is nothing like being unwell and not being "useful" to people to see what they really think of you when they find they cannot use you.

Painful but I'm getting on with stuff. Thankyou Smileless flowers xx

Mandymoo456 Tue 22-Oct-24 09:27:43

Im another heartbroken mum
His birthday is Dec 27 so from now I'm so sad, I have decided to go and find him and that excites me, he will be 42 soon, I will be asking him if this torture is necessary, I agree with others how we are good at masking our heartache,

Indigo8 Tue 22-Oct-24 09:51:07

You were so right to start this thread 00opsidia. Your feelings are clearly very raw. It is well documented that physical and mental wellbeing are very closely linked.
Be kind to yourself and remember that you are not alone. Plenty of people have come through this very dark tunnel and there is light at the end even if you emerge a changed person.thanks

DiamondLily Tue 22-Oct-24 12:04:24

Mandymoo456

Im another heartbroken mum
His birthday is Dec 27 so from now I'm so sad, I have decided to go and find him and that excites me, he will be 42 soon, I will be asking him if this torture is necessary, I agree with others how we are good at masking our heartache,

You do what you think best, but you may not get the response you want. Be careful you don’t end up hurting more than you do now.

Best wishes. πŸ’