Limericks 9

I think I'll hang out with celebrities
They are always engaged in facilities
I will fit right in
Holding my tummy tight in
They’ll be amazed that I’m in my seventies.

When does a woman reach her peak?

When does a woman reach her peak?
When all her suitors stand in line, so to speak

When does a woman reach her peak?
When all her suitors stand in line, so to speak
It's great to then have the choice

When does a woman reach her peak?
When all her suitors stand in line, so to speak
It's great to then have the choice
To sort out the men fron the boys

When does a woman reach her peak?
When all her suitors stand in line, so to speak
It's great to then have the choice
To sort out the men from the boys
But hope not to end up with a freak !

I am so fed up with predictive text

I am so fed up with predictive text
It can leave me quite perplexed

I am so fed up with predictive text
It can leave me quite perplexed
I feel like a dinosaur

I am so fed up with predictive text
It can leave me quite perplexed
I feel like a dinosaur
To the iPad I'll take a saw

I am so fed up with predictive text
It can leave me quite perplexed
I feel like a dinosaur
To the iPad I'll take a saw,
Whatever will they invent next?

Maybe a robot to clean the house?

Maybe a robot to clean the house?
Oh, I thought that was a spouse!

Maybe a robot to clean the house?
Oh, I thought that was a spouse!
Not all are willing

Maybe a robot to clean the house?
Oh, I thought that was a spouse!
Not all are willing
Busy beer swilling

Maybe a robot to clean the house?
Oh, I thought that was a spouse!
Not all are willing
Busy beer swilling
Is he a man or a mouse?

A ladies man he thinks he is

A ladies man he thinks he is
Believes he has us in a tizz

A ladies man he thinks he is
Believes he has us in a tizz
But we see straight through

A ladies man he thinks he is
Believes he has us in a tizz
But we see straight through
A perceptive, wise crew

A ladies man he thinks he is
Believes he has us in a tizz
But we see straight through
A perceptive, wise crew

ooops
A ladies man he thinks he is
Believes he has us in a tizz
But we see straight through
A perceptive, wise crew
We're also quite good in a quiz

My favourite subject in school

My favourtie subject at school
Was art 'cos I was so cool

My favourite subject at school
Was art 'cos I was so cool
With my paints and brush

My favourite subject at school
Was art 'cos I was so cool
With my paints and brush
And colours so lush

My favourite subject at school
Was art 'cos I was so cool
With my paints and brush
And colours so lush
And a teacher who made us girls drool!

I hated lessons on home economics

I hated lessons on home economics
I also hated maths and statistics

I hated lessons on home economics
I also hated maths and statistics
So I can't bake a cake

I hated lessons on home economics
I also hated maths and statistics
So I can't bake a cake
Nor use a rake