Do you tell all?

I tell anything that is praiseworthy, any thing that is illness related. Anything naughty I deal with at the time and do not tell the parents.

I agree, anything health related is essential, bumps, falls, Calpol etc , strops are debatable and probably best kept to myself, but I would always give full credit for achievements, milestones and generally being "good".
Oh occasional ice cream and "treats" follow the general,principle of "what happens at granny's, stays at granny's"
Nursery keep a record for parents at pick up,time and I roughly follow their example.

Have to agree with that said above. Strops were dealt with and then forgotten, good behaviour praised and passed on. We have photographs of, among other things, empty plates and potties with poos and wees in! But small children are awful blabber mouths and if you put a foot wrong, mummy and daddy will certainly know all about it! "Mummy, Grandad fell in the pond - he was showing off!" (Well, he was actually!). DD phoned me up last week to say she had fainted in a supermarket. "I wouldn't have told you", she said, "but GS has told the world and his aunt, so he is bound to tell you!" And, sure enough.....

Glad it's not just me that photos empty plates Greyduster though I have never done the potty one
I agree that tantrums are best left untold and would never usually say things like "I will have to tell mummy" Though I did say I was going to tell her D when oldest smacked his little brother really hard but as soon as D arrived he said "nannies going to tell you anyway so I'm just saying I hit X" !
I always pass on praise.

When I had a new baby and was poorly in bed with mastitis my mum came to look after me the baby and my four year old. When she brought my lunch up my little son came running into the room and the first thing he said was 'Grandma burnt the saucepan!!!!' She said ' I told you not to tell Mummy that'! It's no good trying to keep things quiet when they can talk!

When I'm babysitting my daughter demands lots of photos and information! We are in touch by text all day!

Definitely tell parents all the positives and all the funnies.

I also tell them where we've been and what we did, what he's eaten as a meal and how much he's drunk. Also how much tv he's watched. DGS is on the Autism Spectrum, is very fussy about what he will eat and tells me 'Go away Grandma' if I ask what he's done in the toilet. Hence the making sure he drinks enough water and Smoothie juices!

I often have to deal with meltdowns too but only tell mum and dad that we had a 'funny five minutes' and that he's been fine since. There's no point in describing what actually happened as the poor child has no understanding of it

As soon as she walked in the door last Tuesday evening DGS (6) told his mum (DDiL)that I said the "poo poo word" (sh*t) twice!

She laughed and said "oh naughty grandma" then whispered in my ear "so they've been good then" lol

Seriously though. I very rarely report anything back unless its very important like illness/minor injuries/calpol doses etc. It's really not necessary.

More the other way round now my two G'dtrs are at school. I'm far from perfect so there's plenty of ammunition there, but at least we all gave a laugh. I do try not to report back bad behaviour because it just sounds like moaning, unless it's something serious. Only thing recently was when g'dtr2, age 5, refused to do her reading homework because she wanted to play. I asked her Daddy to tell her that next time she had to do it. No problem since.

I agree with other posters - I don't say the bad things if there are any but precis the fun times they have, usually with grandad! I do mention whether the little one has had a sleep though his mum usually guesses because of the matchsticks holding up my lids. They all know that its 'my house, my rules' and luckily it seems to work - most of the time

I don't tell all but I seem to be found out, GD reported to her mum "Granny bought us ice-cream". I also make my GS toast and jam mid-morning, he has picked up on the word jam and started asking for some. DIL is a dentist and sugar is very strictly controlled, "Well," she said looking at me, "he didn't learn that from us!"

I stick strictly to a Need to Know rule, coupled with What the Eye Doesn't See. GS1 doesn't often drop me in it and the little one is still a bit young. I still have vivid memories of the things that used to be written in DD's "News" book when she was at school. I think she was aiming at the News of The World

Deeda A friend and I used to alternate Friday afternoons at each others' houses when the children could play together and we could chat – not, of course, without constant interruption. This was delightful because the children had fun, one house was left in an orderly state each week and one mummy didn't have to cook the children's tea each week. After they had all been fed and we were clearing up we used to treat ourselves to a glass of gin and tonic.

Imagine how I felt when I read five-year-old absentdaughter's news book. "My mummy has gin and tonic for breakfast".

The Need to Know rule applies here too. DD didn't need to know about the toy that suddenly whizzed towards Grandad's chest yesterday. "But I was just playing catch with Grandad" was the impressively quick excuse. He's promised to give a bit of warning next time.

We also have older grandchildren aged double figures. Our attitude is still to praise good behaviour but we've also told them if they need to talk what is said in nan and grandad house stays in nan and grandad house ,the only exception being if it is something serious that mum and dad should know. Its worked very well over the years and we've had interesting conversations about all sorts that they've been too embarrassed to talk to parents about or didn't want t to hurt parents feelings.we have a good balanced relationship with them

I tell everything almost word for word and I send pics. During the day. I discuss problems so I can deal with it better next time. A lot depends on tiredness, so I always find out if my grandchildren have had plenty of sleep. I also take them places. Soft play, swimming, walk the dog by the caves. Their imagination goes wild. So my children want to know what we have been doing.

As far as I'm concerned, what happens at granny's stays at granny's, unless it's a major milestone. I will always correct bad behavior but don't complain to parents about it.

Balanced view I think, as others have stated never negative comments, always positive. It works wonders! Only time to comment is if they've been unwell or had a bump, which thank goodness hardly ever happens. Also as they get older, keep their confidences, unless it is a serious matter that their parents should be aware of. It makes for a comfortable relationship where they can air their feelings without being judged and you can sometimes give some common sense answers to some of their worldly woes!

i have my rules and grand daughter respects my decisions..its taken time and consistency but we have a good relationship.The melt downs stay private unless its something that needs to be aired.
We have all been parents but our standards are not those of our children. In the early days SIL and daughter thought I was to strict..now I think they see Im not, merely consistent.

TBH they are usually very good here.Nothing a firm word acn't control.
I don't normally tell parents if they have been naughty but there was one exception when DGD - who is a handful & used to have terrible tantrums when she should have long grown out of that phase was a nightmare one whole day, I did tell her I would tell Daddy when he got there & I did. He gave her a proper ticking off & we had tears & hysteria. She has never done it again here though so it must have made an impression.

Nothing is left untold if GS1 is around So no choc bars or treats given unless I am told too. What I have never told DDIL was that GS2 took his first steps with me she has to go to work so it would have been mean for her to miss out.

I tell the good and don't tell about the bad unless of course it's really necessary but I know from experience that they'll tell Mom if I don't ?? I used to treat our DGS to a mini chocolate ice cream bar after dinner...... apparently they popped round once while I was out and he asked Mom to open the freezer for his treat? He used to ask for the green pop that Nanna has in the 'other' fridge..... it was Sprite which I mix with my whisky ??

Pollyperkins.

I think it's a bit extreme of your daughter to want photos and constant texting all day long.

It's exhausting enough looking after a toddler without having to do all that.

It drives me up the wall when my daughter wants to know exactly what time he fell asleep, woke up, had his lunch. Wheee we went for walk, for how long etc etc.

My patience is really stretched, especially when I am tired out.

Also, if he hasn't slept for long enough, I get scolded. Try to explain you can't make them go to sleep. If only, Aye.? Don't you sometimes feel a bit used.?

Gosh you daughter should be having a break from the children not wanting constant updates and photos doesn't she trust you? Or is it maybe a brand new first baby ? When my parents used to have my three I never asked hour by hour what they did nor do my children with me now, they trust that if there's anything serious I ll tell them