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moving to be near grandchildren not easy, help!

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hopefulforfamily63 Thu 15-Mar-18 12:20:54

My daughter, son in law, and my only grandchild less than a year live 4000, km away in Canada. I spent the first five months of my grand-daughters life living as a nanny in their home and it worked well.

I now want my husband of 30 years, father of our daughter to move to the same city as our daughter. I am just retiring and he could do the same, he is 67 years. We could rent for a year and rent out our westcoast home. I am open to ideas...

Full stop. He won't retire, he won't move, he won't talk about this subject. His compromise is that I take an apartment in the kid's city and go back and forth from our westcoast home to the province of our kids.

While I had not imagined leaving my husband, I can't take the intransigence and feel I will take an apartment and see what happens. He says he will work and pay for it. He would like me away no more than 3 months at a time.
It all makes no sense. Don't grown adults work together, find a compromise, is this it? Your view?
What do you think of a husband who agrees his wife can live away for three months at a time, back and forth?

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GabriellaG Wed 21-Mar-18 04:50:52

ruthiek
It's never too late to learn to cook. Why have you not shown him a few recipes and encouraged him?
It's just laziness to say one cannot cook when there are so many ready meals and pre-prepped ingredients on the market.
An hours drive away is nothing. Where I live it takes that amount of time to drive 20 miles on weekdays.
You can hardly expect your family to cook daily meals for your husband if you 'go first'. What about washing or ironing or cleaning the house. Would they be expected to do all that too besides their own family responsibilities which may increase.
What if they were away on holiday?
I think a few lessons in using the cooker and washing machine are in order. He's only 67 so not in his dotage.
I'm sure you'll manage.

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