OVER INDULGENT PARENTS

Offer to have the children for a day/weekend so the parents get a break. Obviously treat the children well but apply your own house rules (age appropriate and within reason). It will help the children to understand that the whole world will not treat them like home.

No idea grapefruitpip but it happens all the time. Just a waste of time for all the kind souls who take time to respond to the OP who never returns. Beats me why they do it.

Well it could either be bad manners, their life is chaotic and they don't have time or they are fabricating the whole thing.

The last option is so very odd.

"Offer to have the children for a day/weekend so the parents get a break. Obviously treat the children well but apply your own house rules (age appropriate and within reason)."

Beware of offering parents a "break. Especially if parents work, the weekend is all they have to spend with their kids.
Parents will ask for a break when needed, this will not come accross as a favour, more as grandma time grabby - not a good thing

"It will help the children to understand that the whole world will not treat them like home."
Even worse, you are "offering to give the parents a break" with a hidden agenda.
This is the worst advice ever.

It is not up to the grandparent to show them the real world. You are NOT the parents. Grandparents do not have the only real and valid definition of "real world"
Kids go to school, they already see the real world. Kids go out to library, daycare, etc. They see the real world.

"Obviously treat the children well but apply your own house rules (age appropriate and within reason)."

You are NOT their parent, you do not determine which rules their children follow, are appropriate or within reason.
This speaks volumes about entitlement and overstepping boundaries.

You are NOT their parent, you do not determine which rules their children follow, are appropriate or within reason.

But if children are in someone elses house then those house rules apply … so as an example if parents think it is fine for their children to jump all over the beds in someone elses house and the bed owners are not happy with that then it seems entirely reasonable that the owners of the beds state that they do not want their belongings treated in that way!!!

Madgran77
I agree with your statement, assuming parents agree with the rules and approve.

If not, meeting in a neutral place or at the parent's home fixes the problem.

The statement you picked is not worrisome by itself, it is very reasonable.
However, if you put it in the context of the full comment of the poster, it insinuates the grandma knows better than the parents and that "weekend or visit to give the parents a break" goes further than reeducating the kids not jumping on beds.

IMHO, you can set rules that have to do with how you want your house to be kept - for example, no jumping on furniture, food is to be eaten at the table only, etc. You can't realistically make rules for someone else's children regarding things such as finishing their plate at meals, how much screen time they get, whether they're allowed sweets or not, etc.

*However, if you put it in the context of the full comment of the poster, it insinuates the grandma knows better than the parents and that "weekend or visit to give the parents a break"
goes further than reeducating the kids not jumping on beds*

I dont think it implies that atall and dont see how you infer that Hithere The OPs original post seems to be expressing a genuine concern about run ragged parents and asking how she can give then gge opportunity to consider alternatives to the position in which they find them selves. She doesnt particularly say she wants to make rules for her grandchildren atall!!

You are NOT their parent, you do not determine which rules their children follow, are appropriate or within reason.

This is a comment you brought in related to issues the OP never suggested. My comment about beds as an example related purely to that comment

agnurse I absolutely agree with your post 19.41 1/11/2019

Not sure if norton is reading or just ignoring. But my advice is similar to lots. Ignore it! School will sort the 4 year old out and the 2 year old when it comes. Getting involved with what you would do is totally wrong! These children are not yours. Doesn't matter if you disagree with the parenting or not. Other than suspecting abuse, grandparents do not get a say in how children are raised.

Sometimes I feel my GC (and got lots) are over indulged but I say nothing. They are different with me and know MY boundaries so that is all that matters to me.

Know YOUR boundaries norton.

Sometimes I feel my GC (and got lots) are over indulged but I say nothing. They are different with me and know MY boundaries so that is all that matters to me.

Tedber Yes!