Family conflict

Not only is it reasonable not to want to be caught in the middle of your DIL and DD's disagreements, but you are entitled to ask them both to treat each other politely, if they meet in your house.

They are grown women who don't have to like each other or get on, but they do need to be polite to each other for the entire family's sake.

What does your son feel about these issues between his wife and sister? Surely, he could tell them both to behave!

I agree with others, don't get in the middle.

Your son, dd, dil and sil are adults. Let them manage their relationships as they see fit.

Congratulations on the marriage of DS and DD and on the coming GC! I'm going to chime in w/ others and advise you to refuse to play piggy in the middle. Let them solve their own differences (or not).

Please don't expect the baby to take on that "job" either. It might be the case, but maybe not. Your AC (adult children) and CIL are all adults and need to deal w/ each other directly or not at all - THEIR choice. Please just enjoy being a GM2B and then a new GM.

Bekind, I don't think your family is unusual actually. It's sad but some people just don't gel with one another

Don’t get involved. You certainly shouldn’t be worrying before the baby is born. Conflict is bad enough without preemptions. Just look forward to your new grandchild.

I don’t get along with my sil we are just very different people. Nothing huge no massive row it’s just lots of little things. I find her rather babied and over bearing contact wise. If I hadn’t of married her brother I wouldn’t be her friend. I am civil but do find myself trying to avoid going to my in-laws if I know she’s going to be there. Dh also sees her as the golden favoured child out of them both to his parents. Which I also see repeating in the actions towards the grandchildren. Mil has tried once to engage sil and dh together as if they where little children again and that blew up spectacularly in her face where dh let out a lot of his views on his mother and sister.

I’d stay well back and be neutral, don’t force anything and make sure your not taking sides even accidentally in the case of spending too much more time with the other either. The resentment my dh has is huge and when the in-laws die I see him going no contact with his sister if he doesn’t before.