Gransnet forums

Grandparenting

Page 4 of 4 | First | Previous | Next | Last
| Flip | Customise |

Speak up or shut up!

(87 Posts)
Add comment | Report
Granjenny Sat 28-Nov-20 19:31:46

Months ago I posted on here as my 8 year old grand daughter was rude to me, telling me to mind my own business and a few weeks later saying “what’s it got to do with you” when I asked her a question. It turned into an almighty family row as my daughter never disciplined her behaviour. Anyway it smoothed over as time past and because of social distancing we have not spent much time with my family. On a couple of occasions my grand daughter has brought up the row saying do you remember the fight and to her mother , was it last time I stayed over at GM did we have that row.? My daughter is quick to dismiss it quickly without getting into another discussion but I’m tempted to say to my grand daughter do you remember when you told me to mind my own business when I asked you a question......, so I guess it’s a vote to you all, would You speak up or shut up and just let it go??.

Add comment | Report
welbeck Sun 29-Nov-20 23:12:41

on this occasion, i agree with hetty above.

Add comment | Report
chris8888 Mon 30-Nov-20 09:54:33

Totally agree with blacksheep46 - she is looking to clear the air with you

Add comment | Report
NannyG123 Mon 30-Nov-20 10:21:11

Leave it.let bygones be bygones. If she brings it up again I woul just say. Not this again I thought we'd got over that . Then say but if its still worrying you, let's talk about it.

Add comment | Report
Nadateturbe Mon 30-Nov-20 11:22:24

I think the little girl hasn't got over the row yet. She needs to talk about it.

Add comment | Report
Nadateturbe Mon 30-Nov-20 11:25:06

.......I also think her mother should have told her not to be rude to granny. But she's only a child. She needs reassured that everyone is ok.

Add comment | Report
trisher Mon 30-Nov-20 20:14:59

I don't see how talking about it can do anything except lead to another row. Both Granjenny and her DD have set ideas about this. I do think the girl should have had to apologise. Children shouldn't be allowed to be rude to anyone.

Add comment | Report
MamaBear20 Thu 03-Dec-20 00:29:18

My answer depends on what you asked her that evoked such a response. Was it a mundane question, such as what did you have for lunch? Or was it personal, and therefore the child appropriately stood up for herself and let you know that it was none of your business? And how did a rude comment from a child turn into a row with the family?

Add comment | Report
Granjenny Fri 04-Dec-20 00:29:14

We were sat in a restaurant and I asked her what she was having for lunch!!!!

Add comment | Report
Ramblingrose22 Fri 04-Dec-20 00:48:40

So either she thought you were "not allowed" to ask what she was having to eat or she was worried that when you found out when the food was served you wouldn't approve of her choices.

I agree with others that it's unwise to revive the subject but the next time you think she is being rude to you I think you should point out that she has been rude and say why.

Add comment | Report
Granjenny Fri 04-Dec-20 01:41:29

Thanks everyone for your input! I guess we are all learning how to handle today’s grandchildren who are so different to previous generations and in fact when our own children were youngsters. Today they are far more grown up and advanced !

Add comment | Report
eazybee Fri 04-Dec-20 09:01:39

Having seen the cause of the family row, it clearly isn't:
today’s grandchildren who are so different to previous generations and in fact when our own children were youngsters.
It is the parents' attitude to their children's behaviour which is different, and sad to say, they seem prepared to avoid confrontation with their daughter at all costs, the direct consequence being her poor behaviour towards you.

Page 4 of 4 | First | Previous | Next | Last
| Flip | Customise |