Missing grandaughter so much

So presumably he owes the missing 2 weeks?

Yvonne57 if that is your granddaughter's real name you should consider having this post taken down. It's very easily identifiable.

Is there a custody order and child support set up?

You gc is doing fine. This is temporary

Can you pay it for him? I wouldn't normally say that, but if you think your son is genuinely broke, it would put things back on track and make both you and your GD happy.

If the mother of the child is a good mom, the child is doing OK.
There could be a chance you are projecting your feelings onto your gc

Is this the first time he defaults on his payments?

How long has he been unemployed and what is he doing to remedy it?

It would be wise to concentrate on items that are actionable and can address the issue.

Its your sons responsibility to pay something towards his daughters care regularly. Assuming this is the first time he has missed a payment you might go halves with him, but if its not he needs to get a job, any job. How does he pay fir his bedsit?
Try not to get involved and keep a reasonable relationship with the mum.
Most people go weeks or longer between seeing grandchildren, so you have been lucky to see so much of her.

This is not a very stae environment either - what is your son doing to get a place of his own and be able to take care of his daughter on his own?

Stable.... sigh

sodapop

Yvonne57 if that is your granddaughter's real name you should consider having this post taken down. It's very easily identifiable.

Yes, I agree. It's an unusual name.

My son hasn’t got that much money he is at the moment out of work
But your DGD's Mum still has to house and feed her - presumably she needs that maintenance payment.

It is distressing for you but can you help him out and pay in the meantime and make sure he takes any job while he looks for something permanent?

But do it without enabling him - tell him it's a loan and he has to pay you back when he is earning again.

Yvonne57 presumably your son previously paid these sums. My question would be what has he spent that money on, recently, instead of his daughter? If he is out of work then he surely can get at least one job to cover his expenses. There are loads of vacant jobs out there. It's up to him really.

sodapop

Yvonne57 if that is your granddaughter's real name you should consider having this post taken down. It's very easily identifiable.

Yvonne is talking sense, a very unusual name and too much information make the family identifiable. Get it taken down.

sodapop

Yvonne57 if that is your granddaughter's real name you should consider having this post taken down. It's very easily identifiable.

Yes. You could post it again without her name.

I do sympathise that your DGD has been stopped from coming to see you. That doesn’t seem right even if her father is not paying child maintenance. I hope he finds a job soon.

If you were to go before the courts as a parent who missed payments, access would be considered an entirely different issue. In this day and age, when people are struggling with the cost of living and the fact that he is unemployed, I think that to take away access is cruel.
Let's face it, this is not about not having enough money. If it was, your child being fed and watered by somebody else for the weekend would save you money. If the situation continues, I'd advise you fund an access application for fixed access for your son to see his daughter. It doesn't have to be an expensive exercise. We had to do it for our son and the courts were very understanding.
Of course, if your son is out of work, he can apply to have his maintenance payment reduced whilst he looks for work. Yes, he has responsibility to maintain his child but if you do not have the money, you can't magic it up out of thin air.

There has to be way more to the story to the details shared here - it is often the case the culprit is another issue

Hithere

There has to be way more to the story to the details shared here - it is often the case the culprit is another issue

Yes, I agree.

How was the maintenance amount agreed? Are the courts involved?

Your son needs to ask CAB for advice.

A good post icanhandthemback. It's cruel for this little girl to be deprived of her father because he has missed a child support payment.

Courts do not grant parental access purely on the basis of the parent the child is not living with keeping up with their financial obligations.

I agree you should remove her name

Contact is totally separate from maintenance so far as the English law is concerned. The children act starts from the premise that the welfare of the child is paramount. M the assumption is that means the child has the right to a positive relationship with both parents. The parents have duties to safeguard and protect the child

Hithere

There has to be way more to the story to the details shared here - it is often the case the culprit is another issue

Not necessarily. My ex-DIL has never played fair when it comes to our grandson. My son paid the maintenance plus extras, never missed an Access visit and would swop dates (even at Christmas) if she requested he did. He once said he would be unable to make a visit so asked to make a swop after the stillbirth of his child. She threatened to take him back to court about access if he didn't turn up. Sometimes women think they have the whip hand and aren't afraid to crack it even if it hurts their child.

Your son needs to get a job and support his child properly.

It's not right for him to take no responsibility for his daughters needs.

Mum likely has had enough and has no other way to force him to do his duty by his child.

The other reason would be that if he has a jib he can then go and get formal visitation through the courts.

You need to talk to him, this is his problem to manage and resolve so that you can see your grandchild

Icanhandthemback, thanks for sharing your experience, it must have been so difficult for you, your son and grandson.
There is often ‘more to the story’ as Hithere says, but it doesn’t always involve fathers not fulfilling their part of the parenting role.

icanhandthemback sometimes women think they have the whip hand and aren't afraid to crack it even if it hurts their child. It's horrible when children arse used in this way.

Exactly Iam^it doesn't awalys involve fathers not fulfilling their part of the parenting role^ and providing financial support is just one role of parenting.

There is no suggestion that the OP's son takes no responsibility for his daughter's needs VS, quite the opposite from what we do know.

Mum likely has had enough and has no other way to force him to do his duty by his child really!!!! What have you based that on?

are used

Your son needs to get a job and support his child properly.

We have no idea about his limitations in this area and if he has none, why assume he isn't trying. He's obviously paid his way for 5 years but suddenly the mother must have had enough.