Gransnet forums


Is it right/ok?

(69 Posts)
Thistlelass Tue 22-Aug-23 00:31:17

For my 6 year old grandson to refer to oral sex? Just that really. I am seeing this as a step beyond generally talking about body parts and poop jokes etc. Maybe I am wrong. All I did was notify the parents what he had said and say that it troubled me he knew about this. I never experienced any such issues with his Dad and my other 3 sons. It is worrying me very much.

crazyH Tue 22-Aug-23 00:49:25

I’ve not heard ‘that’ mentioned by any of the older or younger grandchildren. I have 2 seven year old GC and 2 four year olds GC. HE’s probably heard something and doesn’t even know what it means. Seriously, I won’t worry too much about it. Although, I will tell you of the 3 year old son of my friend. I saw him rub his groin area on a chair and obviously got some pleasure, sexual or otherwise.

Thistlelass Tue 22-Aug-23 02:25:13

Thank you for commenting. He was referring to someone licking his body part. I don't want to be too blunt about this as want it to stay on for comments. It is because he has referred to an action I don't think he should know about at this stage that I am worried.

nanna8 Tue 22-Aug-23 02:28:34

I just hope he is not being abused. That is what my immediate thought was.

Debs8 Tue 22-Aug-23 03:01:43

I would tell his parents…like yesterday!

Thistlelass Tue 22-Aug-23 03:11:28

Oh I have told the parents. I got this info when I was babysitting. Unfortunately they think this is all part of normal child development. Not open to discussing it further.

Hetty58 Tue 22-Aug-23 04:11:44

Anything they hear in the playground, on TV etc. that gets a reaction (shock, disapproval, giggles) will be repeated endlessly.

I strolled past the local primary school and the air was blue with the worst swear words - along with 'Kiss my a***' then was surprised when I saw the culprit, the son of the church warden, that normally polite, well spoken and good mannered (angelic, even) little boy.

Yes, it did make me shudder but I doubt there was much understanding of what the words meant.

V3ra Tue 22-Aug-23 07:24:49

He was referring to someone licking his body part.

As in telling you it has happened?
That's not the same as repeating language he's overheard.
I'd be seriously concerned like nanna8 said.

ParlorGames Tue 22-Aug-23 07:37:41


^He was referring to someone licking his body part.^

As in telling you it has happened?
That's not the same as repeating language he's overheard.
I'd be seriously concerned like nanna8 said.

I would be very concerned too.......his comment was very specific.
Did you tell his parents exactly what he had said to you or merely say that he had mentioned the subject of oral sex?

Calipso Tue 22-Aug-23 07:56:22

Not really enough information to give an objective view is there? Any of us with cats and dogs will be all too familiar with the licking of 'body parts' I would think your average 6 year old would be perfectly capable of wondering about that. Without knowing more context - which you have said you don't want to give- I can't comment further.

And welcome to Gransnet, I think this is your first post?

Maggiemaybe Tue 22-Aug-23 08:35:32

The search facility shows that Thistlelass is an established GN member, and has been for several years.

Calipso Tue 22-Aug-23 08:43:01


The search facility shows that Thistlelass is an established GN member, and has been for several years.

You are correct Maggiemaybe, my apologies, I may have dropped a letter as the search facility showed nothing.

Shelflife Tue 22-Aug-23 09:53:32

I would be very concerned! Having said that goodness knows what children are taught in school these days!! However if my 6 year old GS said that it would ring alarm bells loud and clear!! What would I do about it , that's a good question!

silverlining48 Tue 22-Aug-23 09:59:47

I would be concerned too. You are right to have told his parents. He is far too young to know anything about these things.

Thistlelass Tue 22-Aug-23 10:33:27

He was daring his elder sister to lick his 'pee pee'. He then went on to dare her to lick their dog's rear end and finally dared her to watch an adult movie as he called it. I should have asked him where he learned about these things but was very overwhelmed. The parents seem to think I am judging them. I am no longer child minding for them as it is bad for my health. I remain very concerned.

GrannyRose15 Tue 22-Aug-23 10:41:38

With the extra detail it does sound like it is just 6 year old stuff but I’d keep an eye out for further incidents if that is possible. Also make sure the little girl knows that the best way to deal with these suggestions is to say no walk away and tell mum.

Thistlelass Tue 22-Aug-23 10:51:56

So you honestly think 6 year old boys these days know about specific sexual acts? I don't think they should have such awareness. What if he says this to a child at school or if that is where something happened.

Skydancer Tue 22-Aug-23 10:58:41

This upsets me. Children are exposed to so much that is totally beyond their understanding these days. From what I hear, schools inform them of sexual matters far too young. When my GS was in primary school the boys and girls were taken into separate classrooms and had various swear words explained to them. I think this is sickening. I actually DO believe in censorship. What would have been an X-rated film in my day would probably now be considered suitable for child viewing. Call me old-fashioned if you like but I think children should be children for as long as possible.

Shelflife Tue 22-Aug-23 11:17:22

You are justified in your worry, if your six year old GS is mentioning the words ' adult film ' surely that is cause for great concern . If your GS speaks in school about this I imagine they would contact SS. I hesitate to mention this but you could contact SS yourself anonymously.
What on earth have we come to when a child speaks like this and we have wonder if it is something he has been taught about in sex education lessons!! I am speechless, I know times have changed and sex education lessons are important but just how much are children being told ? If SS are contacted and all is well then no harm done. You are in a very difficult situation but follow your instincts. Please keep us posted.

Shelflife Tue 22-Aug-23 11:18:40

to wonder !

Blondiescot Tue 22-Aug-23 11:24:49

I'd be a bit concerned, to be honest. My GS is almost 6 and I've never heard him mention anything remotely like that. I have to say that if I'd heard him say what your GS has been saying, then yes, it would be concerning me.

Theexwife Tue 22-Aug-23 11:28:35

It does not sound sexual now that you have added the bit about the dogs rear end, if you had said that in the beginning, I think the replies would have been different.

Ailidh Tue 22-Aug-23 11:29:20

Mentioning the dog's bottom, made the peeped thing sound rather better to me, just a boy suggesting Rude things to his sister, on a par with fart jokes.

The adult movie comment is more worrying. I can't remember when I found out about adult films but I was considerably more than 6.

Ailidh Tue 22-Aug-23 11:29:40


Shelflife Tue 22-Aug-23 11:50:33

I agree with Ailidh, it is the fact he mentioned an adult film that is very worrying indeed.