Age to leave babyhood behind?

No they cant refuse them, however more and more nurseries are asking parents to come in and change their children or will only offer half time place. Not if the child has additional needs obviously.

Pre school which is nursery so ages 3 to 4 in our school, no issues, nappies are fine being changed.
There for a few hours home.

When they were ready, actually ready not when a book or people tell you, they were potty trained within a few weeks.

Reception ages 5 wasn't as issue, few hiccups that's all.
Bottles till 3ish, dummies can't remember.

Both in high school now, no nappies, bottles or dummies in sight.

Little lad is 2.5 and absolutely zero signs of potty training.

No rush at all. They all get there eventually.

Kowl

Aren't children bullied or laughed at about this VioletSky?

No, who would bully reception children?

If any child is a bullying and laughing at a child about this then that speaks volumes for the parents, not the kid that's developing at his own pace!

Standards change. Boys were once kept in dresses until they were around the age of 5. They still grew up. So will your grandson. Try not to worry.

I can't help but think that disposable nappies have aided this situation. If parents still had to boil and dry terry nappies they might be less inclined to prolong things.

I don't think teachers should have to deal with kids in nappies, other than exceptional circumstances. The amount of children who can't use knives and forks is also alarming.

Genuinely I know some TAs would complain about children coming in in nappies but in my experience once out of them they had accidents at a far lesser rate than children who had been potty trained for a while... And no TA would ever complain about a child having an accident so it isn't really logical to just let your child have accidents when a pull up could actually save them that embarrassment

The kid is in pre school or nursery.
It's not primary school.
He doesn't have to be in education.

He's borderline toddler and child.
Give him and his parents a break.
He will get there.
There could be other issues you have absolutely no idea about.

Poor lad isn't even 4 yet.

Kowl

He attends nursery class at the local primary school for 2 hours each afternoon. He's supposed to be going for 3 hours each morning in Spetember and then full-time from January next year. My daughter puts a clean nappy on him to go and changes him when he gets home. I wonder if they think he will just wake up one day and use a potty and drink out of a cup by magic.

They will have cups at nursery and if he sees the other children drinking from cips he will probably want to do thst too.

The only thing that might worry me about having bottles of milk is how many is he having? If more than a couple a day is he eating enough of a variety of other foods which he needs at nearly 4?

Obviously, having some milk is good but the amount needs to be reduced otherwise he could lack essential nutrients.

If you look after him, can you buy him his own special toddler cup with attached straw? It's a step forward from bottle to cup.

I was told my DGM was shocked that I wasn't potty trained, she had me to stay and within a week I'd got the hang of it I was 18months.

My own 4 were all dry day and night by 2½. The eldest took longest, the others wanted to be like him
You have to wait until their bladders are mature enough to last the night.

I do blame the comfort of disposable nappies. The children have no incentive.

Given the cost of disposable nappies, I'm surprised that parents don't seem to worry that their toddlers are using them for about a year longer than used to be the norm.

Romola

Given the cost of disposable nappies, I'm surprised that parents don't seem to worry that their toddlers are using them for about a year longer than used to be the norm.

You'd think the cost would be an incentive to toilet train by a reasonable age.

I agree Callistemon and Ramola but if they don't feel wet, how do they even notice?

One of my DC peed her pants on the first day of school. She was too scared to ask to go to the loo.

The school were quite used to it. She was sent home in some spare pants and her wet ones in a plastic bag.

Kowl. You ask if it’s normal now. The answer is unfortunately yes. It is a big problem for schools with children arriving in nappies. There is however nothing you can do about it. It is the parents job to potty train a child and any interference from you will be resented particularly by the parent that isn’t your child.

Ha yes, they are used to me speaking my mind I think. It's a difficult one, because I agree about resenting interference but if things are negatively affecting your grandchild how can you let it carry on and not suggest something. Maybe in the days before google, families welcomed experience and advice from grandparents more than they do now. I can't say nothing when my grandchild is standing in a corner of the room in a nappy and my daughter says "oh I think he's having a poo" and just leaves him to stand there and do it in a nappy. It's ridiculous to me.

Could you not offer to train him? Kowl as my DGM did. As DM told the story she was only too pleased to have help.
Presumably the child can understand now at nearly 4.

I think if he’s aware he is having a poo it would be normal to ask him to go on the toilet? I don’t think 3 is that unusual though these days

I think a lot of it is lazy parenting, and the idea these day that it’s fine to be led by the child , encourages the parents to have the easy way out. Also with the bottle. It’s easier to give the child a bottle than a cup and leave them to it.
It isn’t fair in the child

Potty training can be hard but persistence and patience prevail.

What happens when children are in nursery every day and all day, do the staff potty train or just change nappies?

VioletSky

More people are child led on these things now. Because it is known some children don't achieve full bladder control till as late as 9 in some cases.

Couple that with more patients both out at work etc, these things have become harder for tired parents to deal with

I wouldn't worry overly, Child led potty training is a lot easier, because it is what they want. I've had children come into school in pull-ups and when they decided they didn't want them and were ready, dry just like that.

Im sorry but really? Pull ups? In a class of 30 plus small children following the Early Years Curriculum with one teacher?

Doesn't seem fair or appropriate to me.

3 years and 9 months, heading up for 4, at that age old enough possibly to talk about bodily functions and toilet training. I would have thought, for the child being in a soiled nappy feels uncomfortable and that would register once they do it in the toilet. I've read about children starting school in nappies, too much for teachers to deal with. I remember when mine were that age, the pressure felt relentless to get them out of nappies, female counterparts were always well ahead, I felt my boys were latish in that respect aged between 2 and 9 months to 3 before we got there on a process that seemed interminable. It was expected that children be out of nappies before entering the school nursery around 3 and 3 months, and to my knowledge, all were. My grandson was probably 3 when he was toilet trained, his sister a full year younger. It does seem these days that toilet training isn't something some parents will give over a lot of time too. Would they allow you to help maybe?

I think if a child is still having breast feeds at age three or so, it’s more about the mother wanting to hang on to their babyhood than the child needing it.

Regarding potty training, modern ideas aren’t always the best.

Getting them out of disposable nappies sooner rather than later is better for the child, the environment and the parents pocket.

But not for the makers of Pampers etc, who are likely to encourage their use as long as possible.

I'm sad to say it, but I think it is laziness yes, also 'anything for a quiet life' thinking, as in let him carry on having a bottle and pooing in a nappy because he might cry or have a tantrum if he's given a cup and a potty.

oh dear, yet more parents expecting teachers to potty train their children. Ducking out of being a parent is a theme with some. Parental laziness

I think the parents fall into two categories.

The lazy parents.

Then there are those who follow the latest trends in child-rearing, (the earnest parents) believing that milestones should be child-led. In that case, pupils would leave school having been taught nothing in particular if they decided they weren't ready to learn.

Because it is known some children don't achieve full bladder control till as late as 9 in some cases.
We've known that for years, Violetsky. It was called enuresis, often just nocturnal. I don't know what happens now but years ago children with enuresis would be referred for investigation. It could be a physical cause but often was psychological and they would be referred to a Child Guidance Clinic.