No visitors at the hospital

Oops - the words like Eric Morecambe’s notes were “not necessarily in the right order”
But you know what I mean!

I couldn’t agree more. I could write my experience of ‘heartbroken’ and ‘the joy is gone’ but I wouldn’t be appropriate. This is a happy, lovely joyous time for you all and please try and tell yourself how lucky you are.

Deedaa

When I had my first baby in 1974 we were kept in hospital for a week, and only the father was allowed to visit. Once I got home it was still several days before our parents were able to get away together to visit us. With the second one I was out in 24 hours and my mother in law was staying with us to "help". Total nightmare as she spent most of the time having funny turns and it was a relief when she went home. By this time we had moved 300 miles away so both sets of grandparents saw very little of the new baby.

My first was in 1977 and both sets of parents plus a sister, visited within about 24 hours. All welcome!
Dh didn’t visit until at least 5 days later, but that’s because he was working an 8 hour flight away.

So I was delighted when he turned up, very tanned, and bearing a lovely bouquet. I had a feeling (in those very different times) that some of the staff and other new mothers had been thinking, ‘Oh, yes - husband working in the Middle East - I’ve heard that before!’

I hope you and your husband had some precious time together when he arrived, Witzend, you must have longed for him.

I know you can still see the moment of his arrival! 😍

NotSpaghetti

I hope you and your husband had some precious time together when he arrived, Witzend, you must have longed for him.

I know you can still see the moment of his arrival! 😍

Yes, with rather more hair! 😂

My daughter lives in America and when she was expecting her first daughter she asked me to go over to be with her to help out. I was there when the baby was born, and by that I mean actually watching the birth as the obstetrician had asked me into the room. As you can imagine the event for me was fairly overwhelming and I also had the pleasure of running to tell the other grandparents, who were waiting with one of their other sons in an adjoining room, that we had a healthy granddaughter, and all was well.

Smileless2012 I agree with you. I am somewhat surprised by some comments and advice. There again the venom spouted on the political threads is absolutely shocking.

If she has the baby early in the day it's entirely likely she'll be home the same day. I think you should try and look at it from the new mum's point of view (and try and remember how you felt). It's overwhelming enough to suddenly be responsible for a tiny, new human being without having to worry about visitors either in hospital or at home. Give them the space the want and then be joyful when you meet your new grandchild - and remember it's about them, not you

Gogo84

My daughter lives in America and when she was expecting her first daughter she asked me to go over to be with her to help out. I was there when the baby was born, and by that I mean actually watching the birth as the obstetrician had asked me into the room. As you can imagine the event for me was fairly overwhelming and I also had the pleasure of running to tell the other grandparents, who were waiting with one of their other sons in an adjoining room, that we had a healthy granddaughter, and all was well.

Well good for you but how does this help the OP? 🙄

I think you’ll find there will be restrictions when there home safe as well. It’s very normal nowadays for new parents to do this. Times have changed x

It is extremely hurtful and I am so sorry. When my daughter was born everyone came to the hospital and it was joyful., whereas my first grand child was announced by text with a curt "she's here." It was days before we saw her. Our grandson was even more possessively treated. No-one was able to pick him up but the parents because of germs. It is a negative parent power view of the world which distances wider family. Be there when you are welcome and do what you can to be supportive. Talk to other grandparents, lots of us have stood in your shoes.

Our children giving birth isn’t about us or what we want out of the experience. It’s about them and what they want. They are allowed to want and do things differently from us. Labelling their choices “selfish” or “extremely hurtful” is a dramatic way to center yourself as the main character of their life event. That’s not healthy.

I hope all with rifts and unnecessary conflict can be put aside today to celebrate mums of all generations. Happy Mothering Sunday to all! . May today bring only peace, love, and appreciation