Gransnet forums

House and home

Help calm me. House buying and selling stress

(998 Posts)
craftyone Tue 22-Sept-20 19:33:18

Links to the first six threads

www.gransnet.com/forums/house_and_home/1281471-Help-calm-me-House-buying-and-selling-stress-Part-6?pg=40

thread number 7

Ellianne Sat 28-Nov-20 16:47:59

Sorry to hear about your being upset Shandy. Not nice.

No way, about the file sitting around for all that time in a closed down solicitor's office! Stern words needed all round.

Shandy57 Sat 28-Nov-20 17:01:38

Thanks Ellianne, I think it is ridiculous vets won't come out to our large wildlife sad My neighbour is still waiting for his shotgun licence, unfortunately.

I doubt the vendor is pleased, apparently she's working her notice at her job and keen to progress.

GrannySomerset Sat 28-Nov-20 17:06:12

Shandy if both you and the vendor keep pestering your own solicitor things should happen. I wouldn’t mind betting both firms know one another and could do much better. You are after all paying for this “service”!

Shandy57 Sat 28-Nov-20 17:51:09

Thanks GrannySomerset.

Nothing my solicitor can do until he gets the contract, he's done all the searches and they are back. I'm just going to have to be patient and hope the vendor's solicitor and staff all recover, I am so very sorry one/some of them have this dreadful virus. We are going up to Tier 3 on Wednesday, masses of strangers at the beach today, tide was in so not much space to distance and none of them were wearing masks.

Off to have another Aldi 'french fancy', £1.09 instead of a ridiculous £2.70 at another supermarket!

Whiff Sat 28-Nov-20 18:07:22

Shandy sorry you saw the deer. Hope you are alright. As your vendor hand delivered the paperwork 5 weeks ago it should have been sent to your solicitor straight away. If someone tested positive for Covid then the office should have only been closed for 2 weeks while people isolated. Hope your vendor gives her solicitor hell.

I am on another thread and there is a member in America. There they have open house then give sealed offers. If you are accepted there is a cooling off period of 3 days after that contracts are exchanged . She moved in 3 weeks . Her son lives here is in the process of buying a house she can't believe how long and difficult it is here. Hopefully her son will be in by Christmas.

Shandy57 Sat 28-Nov-20 21:03:43

Just sat down to watch Season 4 Episode 2 of the Crown - starts off with a stag being shot and injured and chat around the Royal table of tracking it down to kill. Not good!

Franbern Sun 29-Nov-20 09:47:11

Good morning everyone. Have been readng, but not contributing to this as much lately. Been rather busy. Am nearly finished painting spare bedroom. Problem is that I can only stand up for a very short time. Okay, with lower part of walls, as I have been able to sit on chair to do that, but the top part did gtake me some time.

I am delighted to have discovered that all DIY paints, these days are water washable for brushes. Even the gloss used on woodwork. I have not done any home decorating for some years and always found thge turps or turn substiture just ruined any brushes I used. Now, I have the same two brushes for the woodwork and the two different colours for the walls and they are perfectly clean and usuable on future occasions. Still do have second coat on one wall to be done, but today I can start to get the furniture back into their normal places, etc.

So many people locally have put up their Xmas trees and light (thinking they make things look cheerful). They may do so now, but will look (to m e) dowdy and sad probably before we even reach Christmas.. We are doing the large tree that goes into the foyer in the flats, next Saturday morning, and I will do my few dcorations also next weekend.
WsM has been placed into tier 3, the reason given was that much of the new housing areas are used by people who work in Bristol which has a higher rate of the virus. It is so sad for the restaurants and hotels, etc. locally - many of which I fear, will never be able to reopen. More families thrown onto the unemployment scrap heap. Probably will cause far more deaths and heartache eventually, than anything that the virus might have done for the next couple of weeks. Will probably go down on 16th December to tier 2 - which will likely be far too late for those business;s. When I trundle around the town I get more and more depressed at the sheer number of empty shop premises.
I had a long chat with my London daughter yesterday, she is attending the chiropractiioner twice weekly and says she feels a little less pain. She knows she needs an MRI - but says it is so difficult to contact her GP, she just has not the energy at the present to make the effort. I cannot nag her, she is a highly qualified and experienced NHS professional she knows what she needs to do, and will get round to it.

Her daughter is starting to get interviews (all on line) and requests for essays, from the Uni's to which she has applied for September. My daughter says she is feeling a little cheated, as she has looked forward to this year and taking her daughter to visit different Uni's. Interesting ( and good), that the first choice Uni has asked my g.daughter for a thousand word essay on WHY she wants to train as a Social Worker. Think that is good, as some youngsters may have a very starry-eyed idea as to what this involves.

My Xmas gift shopping is nearly complete now. Older g.children all get money, and I have purchased and arranged for delivery to their homes the wish list pressies for four younger ones.

Should have been a whole week of WsM Xmas Fayre this coming week - obviously, not being held at all. So hope that those shops that are still there locally, will be able to make up some income when they re-open on Wednesday.

I talked on the phone to a Dr. who said I should give the wrist splints eight weeks, if no better then they would arrange for injections. I went 'cold turkey' three nights ago and stopped taking a sleeping pill at night First night without it was very bad, but last two nights have been a little better. I take pain killers at night and hate taking sleeping pills also.

Shandy do think some are using Covid as an excuse they used to with Health and Safety). My daughter's team have had several members of the months catch the virus, the rest of the have continued working throughout - could not just totally shut down serious mental health team. At the most it would have been shut for two weeks, probably less these days. You do need to nag and nag Be such a pity to miss that end of March stamp duty holiday.

Whiff Mon 30-Nov-20 07:39:39

Franbern glad you are pleased with your painting. My decorator said they don't use gloss paint as the oil in it can turn white yellow over time. I was surprised paints all wash out in cold water. Well remember brushes stiff after using turps to clean them a nightmare.

Sorry your granddaughter is missing out visiting unis. My youngest niece is going through the same process as your granddaughter. I well remember when my daughter applying and in the end she only wanted to go to visit one as she had set her heart on going there. She got higher grades than she needed and did really well at uni. Even though her dad had cancer whilst she was there and died in her final year. Still got a 2.1 BA Hons. I only visited one with my son . His sister visited 1 with him and visited the others on his own. He's choice.

Hope your daughter can get her MRI soon. And hope your wrist splints help. I have never wanted to take sleeping tablets and always refused them when in hospital. I have found sleeping on my back with a pillow under my knees as the NHS website recommend has help ease the pressure on my hip and have been able to sleep. Normally I sleep on my side.

Last of my Christmas presents being delivered this week. Then I will start wrapping. Several parcels to send this year as no pre Christmas visitors. Will use the post office pick up service. My daughter will print the labels for me once I had parcelled them up and paid for postage.

Take care everyone.

Franbern Mon 30-Nov-20 11:13:55

Back from supermarket. Nice cup of coffee and relax.
When my children were in their final A level years, never occured to me (or them) that parents would accompany them on Uni visits. They all went on their own, do think that these older teenagers are more cotton-wooled these days.

In her personal statement, my g.daughter talked about her fathers death a couple of years ago after a long and rather nasty (in the last months) battle with cancer. One of her Uni's has now sent her a 'Special Circumstances' form. She was a bit taken aback as had not written about that for any other reason that showing her own personal experiences with Social Workers. As her mock grades are very good, she is likely to her first choice Uni.

She is do different to her Mum, she was always so very competitive, loved being THE BEST at anything she did, went on (after a dreadfully bad late teenage period), to gain a first class honours in her degree and professional qualification, even though during those years her youngest brother had died tragically, she had a baby and her relationship with baby's father had broken down.

Her daughter, when she used be asked (usually by me) wouldn't she like to best at a subject would look at me with horror shaking her head. Did not like to 'stand out'. But has her own quiet determination. After GCSE's she told her mum she did not want to go to the school Prom, and despite all her friends (male and female) really trying to change her mind, she stuck to it that she did not wish to dress up in that way and attend, eventually, her Mum bought surprise theatre tickets for them for that date - which she enjoyed so much more. So, she knows what grades she needs to get into the Uni of her choice (quite high ones), and will do it. When she was told by a teacher than she could easily achieve an A* on one subject, she just said 'Okay, but do not need that grade!!!

I must say that I do feel rather sorry for anyone involved in house moves at present. So pleased that, by sheer chance, I managed finally to get that all sorted and settled just a few months before that surreal time of 23rd March onwards. Come on, Shandy we really do want to see you finally settled.

I am wonderful if Craftyone is following this thread, will she start the new one that is going to be needed soon? Be good to hear from her as to she is getting on.

Niobe Mon 30-Nov-20 12:15:10

Re the university visits. When my son went to the open day for prospective medical students I never even contemplated going along. When he came back he said “Thang goodness you didn’t want to come Mum” Apparently one mother kept putting her hand up during the Dean’s address to ask questions while her poor daughter sat cringing in her seat.

Niobe Mon 30-Nov-20 12:15:45

Thank not thang!

Shandy57 Mon 30-Nov-20 13:34:28

Morning all, I've been busy gardening today, so many brambles!

We took my daughter in turns to her Russell Group Uni visits, I didn't want her going on such long train journeys on her own. I went to Leeds and Warwick with her, her Dad took her to Cambridge and Sheffield. She got an interview for Cambridge and I took her that time - she didn't get in, but her two very good friends did. That was my favourite visit, I remember walking around enjoying the architecture in the 'warm' breeze - don't get those here very often! Once her friends started at Cambridge it was absolutely full on - 'maids' came in to make their beds so they could fully focus on studying. My daughter had a fantastic time at Leeds, with no regrets.

Enjoy your afternoon smile

Whiff Mon 30-Nov-20 13:43:50

Our daughter was the first in our family to go to uni. She is 37 now and her brother 4 years younger. We didn't do anything to embarrass her and I didn't when I was with my son. We left them to ask all the questions.

I have sent Craftyone several PMs but had no reply. She did tell me she was stepping back and would not be carrying the thread to part 8 but hoped someone else would. Unfortunately it won't be me as I haven't got a clue how to do that. Hopefully one of you can .

Ellianne Mon 30-Nov-20 15:20:49

Our son was too lazy to visit universities but was lucky enough to have a brilliant master at school who steered him to the best course at Swansea. Fortunately for him it also happened to be on the coast, (surfing, kayaking etc). When he graduated with a first it was his professor again who shoved him the direction of Cardiff to do his Masters.
He is far too laid back, infuriatingly so, no wonder he hasn't found a house yet in nearly 3 years!
Love him to bits!

Ellianne Mon 30-Nov-20 15:21:44

That's a shame about craftyone. I hope she is well.

Ellianne Mon 30-Nov-20 15:32:15

What happens then when a thread gets to 1000 posts? Does it just close?

Elusivebutterfly Mon 30-Nov-20 16:08:46

Ellianne, I think when a thread gets to 1000 posts, it stops accepting posts.

Franbern Mon 30-Nov-20 16:09:20

Ellianne Yes, I think it does. Will have to ask GN themselves for advice as to how to start it again with the links, as Craftyone did in the past.

My youngest came back from Hull Uni visit very excited, loving it and saying they had 'loved him'. When no offer came after a couple of weeks he did ask me to find out why not. On a phone call ( this was back in mid-90's), finally managed to get hold of someone who then told me that they definitely wanted him to go to Hull, and had therefore, had to wait for Senate meeting in order to get permission to offer him 2 x 'E's (they used to do that at Oxford back then). I actually asked them NOT to do that, as I felt he would just decide he did not need to continue to work for a good A level results.
My No. 2 daughter was taken up witha special selected group from London schools to Cambridge for English Literature). When she returned she told me there was no way she would want to go that University. She spent happy years gaining her degree at Southampton. Hereldest son is at the same University now!!!

Had another hour painting today, nearly finished now. Has anyone else asked their Alexa how many days there are to Christmas? If you do, you also get a message from Santa, which changes every day!!!!

Elusivebutterfly Mon 30-Nov-20 16:11:36

"This discussion thread has reached a 1000 message limit, and so cannot accept new messages.
Start a new discussion."

This is the message that comes up when a thread is full and seems to happen after 40 pages so not there yet.

Elusivebutterfly Mon 30-Nov-20 16:14:13

The "start a new discussion" is a link that takes you to a new thread in House and home where you can put the title of the thread

Luckygirl Mon 30-Nov-20 16:48:10

Just popped in to explode!

I chased up the situation with my solicitor today and, in spite of the fact that I agreed to sell to my buyers 3 weeks ago, it turns out that they have not yet signed the contract which instructs their solicitor to act. Estate agent has got on to them on my behalf and told them to get in with it.

This is a buyer who dropped out on me before in the summer - I am so tempted to ask the agents to put it back on the market and let the buyers sink or swim - if they want it they will get on with things, and if they don't, then so be it. They live round the corner and I have their phone number and am so tempted to ring them.

Solicitor says the move will not now happen till Feb, so I have to now get chimney swept, order wood, order oil etc. which I had not done as I had not planned to be here still during the winter.

Gosh - I am so angry!!!!

Shandy57 Mon 30-Nov-20 17:00:01

So sorry Luckygirl, do you think they are waiting for a surveyor to be able to visit you before committing to the solicitor's charges? Or did they have their survey when they originally tried to purchase? So sorry you have to spend another winter there, that was my situation last winter - keep your receipts carefully. My buyer was a pig about paying for my 1400L of oil, wanted to pay 'Covid' prices. I would have drained it and given it to my neighbours if it had been possible.

I also would be tempted to go back onto the market, it's definitely a seller's market at the moment and buyers are frustrated by the lack of properties.

Luckygirl Mon 30-Nov-20 17:16:38

Survey done and dusted and accepted. So it's not that. I think they are just half-soaked. I don't want to threaten them with putting it back on the market in case I put their backs up and they dro0p out again. Grrrrr.

Elusivebutterfly Mon 30-Nov-20 18:13:08

Luckygirl - I'm sorry your buyers are mucking you about. These delays are so frustrating.

Whiff Tue 01-Dec-20 09:20:04

Luckygirl sorry this is happening to you. Are you sure they still want to go through with buying your house? It a question you need answering. They may have changed their minds and don't want to tell you. I didn't know my first buyer had decided not to buy my house the day we should have exchanged contracts. She hadn't told her solicitor and had moved into rented accommodation. Which meant she must have planned it for some time.

You need an answer today because if they have changed their minds your house can go back on the market today. The houses round here are selling as quickly as they are out on the market. As everyone is rushing so they don't have to pay stamp duty.

Sorry you are facing having to spend another winter in your home and all the extra costs. What about the house you are buying is that still yours?