Tia

Petallus I don't think that I was responding with hysteria, but I am certainly emotional about this. A child has lost her life and it IS shocking. I have spent years working as a social worker and a teacher and I have sat on child protection case conferences and have worked with children and adults who have been victims of horrendous abuse.
I still find it shocking and I believe that we should not stop thinking it is shocking.
I am aware of the dynamics of dysfunctional families and parents who have no role models of parenting. I agree that these parents and families need support.
I guess that I am referring to the Native American ideology where the grandmother is revered as the wise woman of the tribe. In most extended families the grandmother provides respite, support and unconditional love. It is an indictment on our society that some families are fractured and have lost their way. I understand that but I am still shocked by it.
Also I don't think that this is necessarily class ridden. Dysfunctional families permeate all levels of our society.Sadly.

POGS, I don't understand what your was supposed to indicate?

Pettallus , why don"t u like that term !! I don"t understand

Although, having thought about it, all speculation is just that at the moment, and doesn't help or solve anything! Time for bed....(for me, anyway!)

glitabo it's sad that Native Americans are also excluded and treated as an underclass in many parts of North America. They probably have much in common with benefit-dependent people in this country, without that safety net. Interesting, though, that there is more respect for their elders than here. I agree with you - I have witnessed severe dysfunction in professionals' families, where one would expect education and privilege to lessen the likelihood of violence, abuse and distorted relationships, but it doesn't.

Anagram.

Sorry went to bed.

What I meant was, I am very surprised after 4 searches with both humans and canines her body was not found. Could the neighbour have held her body whilst the searches took place?.

They had plenty of time to move her body before they reported her missing, surely it would stupid not to!.

As I say I can wander into fiction so just a thought.

Anything's possible, POGS. I hear Hazell has now been charged with murder and grandmother has been released on bail.

The photographs of Hazell are shocking. He is younger than either of my sons and looks about 50 - the effect of a drug habit and, I imagine, smoking as well. One addiction is not enough.

pogs what you mentioned had also crossed my mind over the past day or two as the house would have been searched as soon as the report of this poor child had gone missing or so I understand that is the procedure that the Police take,when my DGD went missing last summer the Police came and went under all the beds and in warderobes and shed in garden as soon as they arrived at my DDs house.*mr g* found her at the swings with some bigger girls and she was too frightened to come home across the Rd by herself so stayed out late until the girls where ready to come home very frightening experience for us all.I find it very hard to comprehend the grandmothers involvement in this and prey that the Police are proved wrong but we will never know what goes on behind closed doors will we ?A very well to do family not far from here a pillar of community so to speak had systematically abused their children for 12 yrs before the eldest reported it in secondary school because the treatment they underwent at home was normal to them ?? beyond belief.RIP Tia may God Bless You x

DH suggested that the body may have been moved and then replaced. Sound unlikely without help but how on earth did the police fail to find the poor girl if she was there all the time? It's not a very big house after all.

Just heard the Grandmother's boyfriend has been arrested and the grandmother may be released on bail. Exactly where is she going to go? Not home, that's for sure.

Too bad if the grandmother is innocent; she is already a hate figure for half the country, if not three quarters.

I suppose we will have the usual spectacle of a baying crowd spitting and screaming vitriol at the police vehicle carrying the accused to and from court.

A spokesman for the Met said this am that the loft (where poor child was eventually found) had been searched on Day 1 without success because of 'human error'. I expect lessons will be learned. I cannot imagine how that extended family will be dealing with this.

Lessons will be learned? Not again!

merlotgran I did not like your response to my post which felt targeted and personal.

I believe we do all have prejudices & if we think we do not that can compound the problem. Admitting we do respond with prejudice and trying to make ourselves face that is healthier.

I was merely pointing out some of the ones the media promote ..not necessarily my own! Re plumbers I was reflecting attitudes met by my SiL.

I was trying, but not well enough, to point out how the media often respond to crimes differently depending on class of victim/ alleged perpetrator and that this can sometimes harm a trial both for victim and accused.

It is a terrible and shocking tragedy that this young life has been cut so tragically short and, apparently by someone who should have been taking care of her. I know the area she lived in quite well and the schools she attended.. last year I worked in the primary and my younger daughter attended the same high school.

There are good and bad in all areas. Dysfunctional families are everywhere. It's just that the better off, for whom appearance matters more, are better at hiding it. The media are like geese all running in the same direction and squawking. They are the worst for stereotyping.

Absolutely right! Nfk

I wholeheartedly agree with the last two posts.

There is good and bad in all levels of society. My apologies for my rant last night it was not the time for ranting, our thoughts should be with Tia and her family.

I don't understand why when some children go missing the press take it up but then others go missing and we never hear about it. Can someone explain please? DS3 has a friend who works on a missing children project and apparently many go missing each month but we don't hear about them.

No need to apologize at all glass

That worries me too, why are some pushed more in the media.

Ditto some murders.

One paper/news station hears about one murder/missing person and the rest all follow. Perhaps it's staff cuts?!

It seems from the latest news is that Tia was unfortunately suffocated. As the "step grandfather" has been charged, until the full facts are revealed about this case, it appears ever more likely that he is the guilty party. Obviously it's not fair to make a judgement about what happened and why, but at the moment it does remind me somewhat of the Shannon Matthews case with the over the top declarations by Stuart Hazell something along the lines of "it's not about me and we've got to get her home", as if indeed he had killed her, he would know that that's not a possibility. So sad for her mother to lose her lovely girl in this horrible way, I think all those who have been bereaved and are directly affected in this awful crime should be left to grieve privately without the whole drama fest that surrounds anything like this these days with the ubiquitous heaps of flowers, teddy bears and letters etc.