Gender? Sex? Help me out please.

VS, I remember when I lived overseas, a friend said to me, 'I don't find Asian men attractive.' I remember looking askansce at her. She had no idea she was being racist. Obviously, she 100% had the right to date who she wanted. But to couch it in racism was wrong.

I wouldn’t date anyone with any if the following known characteristics

Racist
Habitual Liar
Philanderer
Thief
Extreme religious beliefs

I do not have a problem with anyone knowing this, and I would say it to anyone who asked.

We do not have to date someone just to make someone else feel comfortable or happy.

granygravy all those things are choices not appearance

VioletSky

granygravy all those things are choices not appearance

That is what the thread is about, choices.

Racism is a choice.

Sexism is a choice.

Homophobia is a choice.

Doesn't make them right.

GagaJo

Racism is a choice.

Sexism is a choice.

Homophobia is a choice.

Doesn't make them right.

Who on this thread has said any of the choices you have mentioned are right Gagajo ?

You are mistaken if you believe being trans is a choice.

GrannyGravy13

VioletSky

granygravy all those things are choices not appearance

That is what the thread is about, choices.

?

VioletSky

You are mistaken if you believe being trans is a choice.

We are fortunate that in the U.K. that it is possible to transition, in many countries it is illegal and they do not have the right to choose to do so.

Granhgravy they still are trans

Its who they are on the inside, the process of transition just changes the outside

Its really deep seated homophobia, and pretending dating and going out with a friend is the same thing doesnt hide it. Its the type of homophobia that we all heard in the 90 ' s its so depressing.

Oh and if lesbians are bigoted for excluding men from their dating pool then so is every straight woman on here who has excluded women from their dating pool.

I haven't excluded women from my dating pool because of anything I dislike or don't agree with about them.

Actually women aren't excluded from my dating pool but I was making a point

Do you think lesbians exclude men from their dating pool because of something they dont agree with them about.

I agree VS. My dating pool is diverse, as my partners have been.

Don't knock someone till you've tried them has always been my motto. There have been some 'interesting' dates.

Honestly its the type of homophobia that I thought didnt exist anymore except in a few isolated cases. I cant believe how naive I have been.

Galaxy

Its really deep seated homophobia, and pretending dating and going out with a friend is the same thing doesnt hide it. Its the type of homophobia that we all heard in the 90 ' s its so depressing.

Yes, indeed. And laughing about what is a serious issue for those involved shows such a lack of empathy and understanding that it is mind-blowing.

The suggestion is that 'dates' for lesbians are asexual, and that sexual attraction for them is superficial and not based on a sexuality that means they are attracted to women (ie female-bodied people) and not to men in dresses.

A lifestyle that involves casual sex may not be one that appeals to many on this thread (including me), but that does not mean that it is wrong, or that it deserves the belittling comments and derision displayed by 'some people'. Those who do choose to practice it should be able to do so without fear of being attacked by transwomen who claim that sex with a penis is no different from sex with a strap-on (all of which is usually expressed much more crudely) and that women who refuse to recognise them as female are TERFs, transphobes and other terms unsuitable for Gransnet.

We should definitely just be attracted to who we are attracted too.

There is absolutely no need to announce "I'm not attracted to xyz" when it's far easier to discuss what we do like in a partner

Galaxy

Do you think lesbians exclude men from their dating pool because of something they dont agree with them about.

My lesbian friends have dated men at times. Some before they came out, a couple afterwards. I know some gay people are resolute, but for others, it's more about the individual.

Totally agree Doodledog

Well there you have it theres no such thing as a lesbian or a gay man just people who are resolute.

Galaxy

Well there you have it theres no such thing as a lesbian or a gay man just people who are resolute.

Ah, sarcasm, the default when no better point is available.

Galaxy

Well there you have it theres no such thing as a lesbian or a gay man just people who are resolute.

Quite incredible, isn't it? I really didn't think people still thought like that.

Its what we used in the 90 's gagajo when faced with such homobhobia.

They were usually straight men back then, telling lesbians that they just needed a man to sort them out. They wore those ridiculous t shirts, 'on the inside I am a lesbian' .