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Identifying as a different gender

(672 Posts)
62Granny Wed 19-Apr-23 18:07:08

On numerous chat programme lately it has been mentioned that a school teacher in an All Girl private school who greeted her pupils with an "Good morning girls", was made to apologise by the head as some of the pupils complained as some of them were identifying as a different gender.
My question is should a pupil who is identifying as different gender be asked to move from a single sex school?
Parents have obviously chosen that school because they wanted their child to be in that environment whether it be for a religious beliefs or better education.

VioletSky Mon 24-Apr-23 16:23:25

I don't make these rules so there is probably no point ranting at me about it, I'm just relaying what I have been taught

I'd show you the actual training but although a few people know who I am on gransnet, I'd like to keep that circle small by not revealing my school

Galaxy Mon 24-Apr-23 16:24:24

It means if I dont do as I am told I can be reported to the police Smileless.

Doodledog Mon 24-Apr-23 16:24:26

In any case!

This girl was not referred to as 'she', (again, AFAWK), but included in a collective address as a girl. She wasn't singled out (AFAWK) for this, which would be different, I think. There is being sensitive to an individual child's demands, and there is letting the tail wag the dog, and the discussion around this case is really about which attitude should hold sway. The case itself has too many unknowns.

VioletSky Mon 24-Apr-23 16:27:32

But widely in order to safeguard children, those children must be able to trust the adults working with them

So surely you can see why that is of paramount importance here

Doodledog Mon 24-Apr-23 16:28:07

Who is ranting at you, VS?

Just because someone has been trained in something doesn't make it right, however. FWIW I have been 'trained' in Equal Opps and have trained others in the subject. Before you say that my training is out of date (no doubt true) the very fact that these things can go in and out of date speaks for itself, doesn't it? If they were written on tablets of stone then that, as they say, would be that.

Galaxy Mon 24-Apr-23 16:31:58

I imagine the families of those who are currently taking legal action against the tavistock will not trust any of the adults who were involved with their children. If I was dealing with the trauma of a child detransitioning I certainly wouldnt trust any professionals who had been participating in social transition now we know it can not be seen as a neutral act.

VioletSky Mon 24-Apr-23 16:33:48

Of course they are subject to change

But that's how things stand at the moment.

2 things I would never put at risk, my job or a child's trust in me. My beliefs or opinions do not come above the children, ever

Smileless2012 Mon 24-Apr-23 16:34:46

Galaxygrin.

Nobody's "ranting" at anyone VS, this is a discussion and it would be good if it could stay on point.

To refer to her as something else is to accept that she is no longer a girl but different. That is not a neutral act That's a really good point Doodledog and as you've just posted, this particular student hadn't been singled out as far as we know, but was included in a collective address.

VioletSky Mon 24-Apr-23 16:35:15

I should mention that other schools may not have the same ethos in inclusion, I do not know specifically what must be in a policy country wide and what is not.

What I do know is my job would be at risk were I too not follow them

VioletSky Mon 24-Apr-23 16:39:15

Sorry its just coming across a bit ranty

But that's because my perspective is, protect children's wellbeing and my perspective also is, that I would compromise and say people can use gender neutral pronouns

I would compromise

Any employer can have written into policy that staff cannot

Curtaintwitcher Mon 24-Apr-23 16:44:07

Surely if the girl truly identifies as male, she/he will not feel comfortable in an all-girls school? Transferring him/her to an all-boys school might bring the whole thing to a head as regards her gender.

Glorianny Mon 24-Apr-23 16:44:43

Funny isn't it when the discussion clearly reveals that the gender critical views (such as the teacher demonstrated) are shown to be unacceptable in the circumstances the discussion immediately shifts to the Tavistock (which is closing) or some other irrelevancy.
The school obviously took its responsibility to make all pupils feel safe and included. The teacher obviously didn't. Any other individual pupil who was different for some reason would be supported, and the teacher would be expected to make adjustments for them.

Galaxy Mon 24-Apr-23 16:46:14

It's not about your compromise, it's about it may be harmful. It's an approach that I am afraid looks as if it has been carried out with little evidence as to the outcomes.

Glorianny Mon 24-Apr-23 16:47:32

Curtaintwitcher

Surely if the girl truly identifies as male, she/he will not feel comfortable in an all-girls school? Transferring him/her to an all-boys school might bring the whole thing to a head as regards her gender.

The child doesn't identify as male. They choose to use the pronoun "they" rather than "she". They are non-binary.

Galaxy Mon 24-Apr-23 16:48:20

They wouldnt be expected to make adjustments that go against the current thinking. It's not irrelevant because its linked to social transition and affirmation.

VioletSky Mon 24-Apr-23 16:48:25

If it helps, I do know that we are supposed to be getting more comprehensive guidance from the government this year.

Schools are getting too caught up in the raging trans debate and our primary concern is our pupils welfare, not public debate.

So hopefully this summer is the correct deadline and all adults working with children will have very clear guidelines and something like this won't happen again

Glorianny Mon 24-Apr-23 16:48:44

Galaxy

It's not about your compromise, it's about it may be harmful. It's an approach that I am afraid looks as if it has been carried out with little evidence as to the outcomes.

Could you describe the harm that might be caused? And give evidence.

Glorianny Mon 24-Apr-23 16:56:25

Creating gender neutral environments in schools has been regarded as desirable by many for a long time. Surely using gender neutral pronouns is just part of that.

VioletSky Mon 24-Apr-23 16:58:57

As I said, there is a child at school we all call "Llama". We have been told not to call them by the name on their birth certificate because they get upset. If we upset them, they won't trust us. Of they don't trust us, we can't safeguardthem effectively.

That would be causing direct harm.

Galaxy Mon 24-Apr-23 17:01:36

Read the cass report it says that social transition for children is not a neutral act, also current NHS guidelines.
As I said greetings are easy as you can say hello everyone but there is a much wider issue, all teachers will have to at some point acknowledge a childs sex whether via pronouns or the numerous other ways it may come up - girls into Stem initiatives in mixed sex schools for example. It's going to cause quite considerable problems if education takes a completely opposite approach to health.

VioletSky Mon 24-Apr-23 17:03:25

I would have thought the new guidelines will take those things into consideration galaxy

So it's a case of wait and see

Galaxy Mon 24-Apr-23 17:05:39

I currently work in education in partnership with health and am laughing at my last sentence grin

Smileless2012 Mon 24-Apr-23 17:08:22

I don't think, even though it's now closed, that Tavistock is irrelevant in a discussion about minors and gender identity Glorianny. If only for the very reasons it was closed, those being that the welfare of those attending was considered to be at risk.

My overall impression of this thread is that the discussion hasn't simply been about whether or not the teacher was wrong, but how the head dealt with the matter as well as the subsequent action of the members of the class in question.

VioletSky Mon 24-Apr-23 17:17:04

The Cass report doesn't mention gender neutral pronouns at all galaxy?

Doodledog Mon 24-Apr-23 17:22:35

When the new guidelines come in, will you insist that they are correct, even if they contradict the current ones that you defend to the hilt, VS? Or will you stick to your current views and concede that guidelines can be wrong?