Living with someone with strongly opposing political views

That's absolutely true Coconut, I have an ex for very similar reasons. In which case, it would seem reasonable to assume that the difficulties that the OP is experiencing in her marriage is less to do with their differences regarding Brexit, and more to do with a clash of personalities and how they manage their differences.

There is plenty of middle ground here. Don’t those of us on the Left also want out of the EU? And didn’t our last Conservative government campaign to remain in the EU?

So, Brexit is not a left or right thing.

Wanting to govern our own affairs again has its appeal to both sides of the political divide. But we may have to suffer the consequences of the EU Referendum promised by both sides too.

Better to ride this wave of uncertainty together.

I don’t think “keeping quiet” is always a cop out. Sometimes where the differing points of view can’t be discussed and a compromise reached (as here, you can’t half leave or partly stay in the EU) so if you are discussing it quite fervently, as sounds the case, you are both trying to get the other person to see your own, strongly held, point of view. It isn’t going to happen. Not discussing it further seems sensible, as there isn’t really any point in doing so.

It wouldn’t bother me we had a different view, but ridiculing your view is another thing altogether. You don’t say if he respects your views in non political discussions, but if he does, that for me, would be a sign that we had no future together.

Does - should read doesn’t! Auto correct gone mad again!

Grampie Well said. Nearly 40% of Labour supporters voted Leave and if you add people who are left wing who don't support Labour you are not far off it being a 50/50 split between left and right.
It should not have become party political. There should have been a cross party committee dealing with it.

Stop talking politics completely. That should enable you to get back to where you were before all that began. It will require a lot of discipline but if you want to stay with him then taking politics out of your lives is the only way.

There are always subjects that create division that cannot be overcome. Why waste time on them?

Smileless I understand you finding my post offensive any smoker would, it certainly wasn’t said with the intention to offend you but it is truthful a smoker doesn’t smell pleasant when they come in from having a fag It’s just a fact

I couldn’t be in a relationship with a right wing Tory (I would have to think long and hard about any Tory). Quite happy to have cross party friendships - some of my friends are raving brexiteers and we usually have a giggle when discussing it - but I couldn’t be in a relationship with them.

I’m a left leaning liberal - so try to be open to ideas, but I have a severely disabled son who has been so horrendously affected by Tory policies and could be even more affected by Brexit that my frustration weigh someone not recognising that would make a close relationship impossible.

We all have our lines in s relationship. It sounds as if you need to either tell him to keep his opinions to himself until he can discuss sensibly, or call it a day. I know that sounds extreme but I also know I couldn’t live with the situation you have described.

Useless ? Messed up? How about Lapdogs.?

This sounds ridiculous, the whole point of being adult is being able to respect other views, even if they are opposing. I think a little growing up is necessary on both sides.

I have always been told "no politics or religion" and I have stuck to that, as soon as politics are started in a discussion I keep quiet,and let others argue!

Hats off to people who can maintain a relationship with someone who has diametrically opposed political views. Speaking for myself I absolutely would be unable to have a partner who did not share my core beliefs and values.
I have fallen out with one friend who is a leave supporter while I am passionate remain; I feel so strongly about this issue that it is a deal breaker for me.

Paddyann, it is not our useless government it is the EU who do not want to loose out on our cash. They are not going to help us as we were keeping them afloat. You Guardian readers won't like this post. Nothing changes there then?

I was/am a passionate leaver.
My DH has no interest in politics & was undecided when it came to the referendum. As he works abroad a lot he has a postal vote & he asked me to fill it in for him 'as I saw fit'. Needless to say I voted 'leave' for him.
Now every time it gets mentioned on radio /TV- I gave up on newspapers years ago - he tells me it is all my fault!
So OK I take all the blame - you can all blame me. I admit it is all my fault & I still think we are right to leave & make our own laws.

Politics and religion are no-nos.
You will never get a staunch Catholic to become a Protestant nor a Jew become a Muslim. You are just about as likely to become a Brexiteer if you are a Remainer.
If you want your relationship to continue then perhaps ypu should shut up.
BTW...I take issue with your stance that only educated people read the Telegraph or Guardian. Broadsheets do not necessarily only garner the readership of what you would have us believe is the 'educated' cream of the population.
My OH, who could probably wipe the floor with you educationally, was always playfully scornful of my reading a well known middle of the road 'rag' but blushingly admitted to having bought and read it on his commute. "Hmm', he murmered, 'It's more interesting than I thought'. He admitted that many colleagues m, on their own admission, bought broadsheets because they were 'the acceptable papers to be seen with' and they were only skimmed or just the financials read.
As for coming on here to ask us to endorse (or not) your stance on politics...I doubt whether the majority would pass your criteria for being well enough informed to proffer a view. They will be the ones who are not deemed to be 'educated' to the standard for which you hold yourself as a beacon.
GG. LL.M.Eur - brought up on council estate in large nothern town and left school with no qualifications whatsoever.

MeltingMacaron
You are describing my life too. When I met my husband 18 years ago we both read the Guardian but then he decided the crossword wasn’t hard enough and switched to the Telegraph. This was about 4 years ago and since then he has become increasingly right wing, especially hostile to Muslims. I find his political views abhorrent. It’s really affected our relationship and we cannot discuss our political differences rationally as he becomes verbally aggressive and ridicules my views at every opportunity. He voted leave and I voted remain and that is another touch light for a heated ‘ debate’. To be honest I have thought about us breaking up many times as I sometimes hardly recognise the man I married. He then redeems himself by being pro many socialist ideals and he is very supportive to the LGBTQ community. I can’t work him out. I have come to terms with our differences with a great deal of frustration, disappointment and sadness. Politics is off limits in our home and that’s how we survive this huge chasm in our relationship. If I was younger I think some of the things he says would be a deal breaker. The Telegraph/ Mail/ Express/ Sun spill their bile on a daily basis and I can see how radicalisation via the media and social platforms takes place by a drip, drip of hatred and intolerance.
I haven’t any answers for you but I wish you luck and was actually really pleased to see I wasn’t on my own. Sorry for being so selfish!

...and I'm ALL FOR leaving the European Union.

DH and I voted on opposite sides in the referendum. As more and more facets have been revealed, I wonder if he is wavering, but there’s no way he will admit it, if so.
It is a subject we avoid. Where we do agree is that a cross-party group should have been responsible, together with plenty of experts in the various relevant fields.
The consequences which are becoming apparent are horrifying, but then we do agree on many of the horrors being perpetuated by this government, especially towards the most vulnerable members of society.
So my suggestion is to find things which unite you, not divide you, even over Brexit.

I am further left than my husband but only by an inch or so. We are both members of the Labour party (active) and voted Remain. I can't imagine sharing my life and bed with someone of a completely contrary view. It affects everything.

If we discuss Brexit we can both get annoyed, so we don’t, we just agree to differ. It’s not a cop out, it’s just that we have much more interesting things to talk about. The one thing we’re united over is the petty behaviour of some of the Brussels bureaucrats and the milking of the system by some British MEPs.
I do discuss politics with friends, even knowing that we don’t agree over some issues.
My Nana told me never to poke a wasps nest unless I wanted to get stung and BREXIT, whichever side you’re on is a huge wasps nest.

I am trying, but failing, to see the link between being a Labour voter and voting remain.
So many Labour voters defected to UKIP and presumably voted leave.
The Tory government campaigned to remain.

If it's supposed to be a 'badge of honour' I cannot see why as the facts don't support this.

I didn't find your post offensive as a smoker Bluebell, it offended because of the assumptions you made about how Mr. S. views me and that he may feel he cannot be honest with me about those feelings.

Luckily for me both DH and I are on the same page regarding Brexit. We voted to leave and I would never insult nor attack anyone who chose to remain even though we are constantly called ignorant and prejudiced. On the contrary we had many reasons we voted to Leave. We have experienced the EU up close and personal after we retired to Greece. We had our own business and a five bed, two bath property and we sold it all and moved to Greece. I won't go into all the details but we were conned by a couple of Greek business men and lost almost everything. When we tried to get help we were told your in Greece now, not in England and DH argued actually we are in the EU. We wrote to the Greek Ombudsman in Brussel's for help but they wouldn't get involved saying ours was a domestic issue and when we sought legal advice we were told it could take years for it to be sorted out and there were no guarantees that they would find in our favor. They tend to "look after their own" so we had to cut our losses and get back 'home' while we still had enough to start again so we have first hand knowledge of exactly how much the EU cares about it's members.

Politics is always a no,no! It causes to many heated discussions,you both sound passionate about your opinions,a good debate is great,but if it's getting a bit overboard,you will have to agree to disagree!
No one knows what it will be like after Brexit,it's new for all of us! We will just have to wait and see!

If they vote Labour just ask "Wheres the money coming from", problem solved, you won't hear any more.