So annoyed with one son

It has been suggested to me that I "give" a similar sum to my lot . I had never considered the "repayment" idea , I might float it past my solicitor , I think I might run into the same snag

Why did you “give” them the money in the first place ? I don’t understand ? Especially as you say you can’t afford it . Surely you either give money or lend it ?

Did they all need the £20,000 at the same time ?

I’m Not being awkward just genuinely puzzled CrazyH

Aggie, if I had a good income/pension, I wouldn't have asked for repayment.
But needs must....

Try telling him unless he starts making the monthly payments you will have the £20k back thank you very much?

for you crazyH

Gillybob, due to arrival of new babies etc, they needed an extra room, and instead of borrowing from the Bank at a high interest rate, I thought an interest free loan. I gave them at the same time , just to be fair to all three.

Oh and if no luck, definitely change your will so he doesn’t get a penny more.

How very mean of him, crazyH. That's not on. No one wants to fall out over money but I wouldn't mince words, tell him pay up or lose his inheritance.

Oh dear Crazy. I know it costs, but always better to do this type of thing through a solicitor then everyone knows where they stand.. Too late now. If he isn't going to do the right thing/move his a****, then definitely do as Hooty suggests. Could you discuss this with the other 2 or would that make the whole situation worse?
for you. We Mums always try to do the best for our offspring!

Fair enough CrazyH none of my business really I was just wondering why they all needed to borrow such a large amount at the same time?

Is the son who hasn’t started to pay you back got the money to do so ? Could he be in financial difficulty and trying to avoid the subject ? I agree not fair on the other 2 who are honouring the agreement .

Tell him you'll deduct it out of his inheritance if he doesn't start making repayments

crazyH If your estate is worth less than £325,000 there will not be any inheritance tax to pay anyway. If your husband left his whole estate to you, the limit goes up to about £650,000. Doesn't help solve your problem, but just thought I would mention it.

Next time he visits have a standing order form all ready for him to complete and sign. Choose a visit when his brothers are around so that they can see that he is currently paying 'as and when' rather than by SO and they will see that he signs it and puts his bank details down.

Was it the son who has not completed the SO form the son who first suggested this arrangement ?
I would let his brothers know the situation he has left you in.

Yes, if he doesn't pay it, I will deduct it out of his inheritance.
Monica, I am divorced and my ex has remarried, so I have only £325000 allowance. My house is worth about £250000, hence giving money away to the children.
Gillybob, I dont think he's in financial difficulty.
Glammanan, I'm the one who suggested an SO , and at the moment, I don't want his siblings knowing the situation

Are you aware that ‘gifts’ that are worth more than the £3000 allowance are subject to Inheritance Tax. The amount of tax to pay on these gifts depends on whether it was given within 7 years before the person died.

I presume this asking them to repay these ‘gifts’ is a tax dodge.

Sorry no sympathy,

crazyH, I think you might have muddied the water tax wise. Did you get advise before you did this?

Did it ever occur to you that this might happen?
Do they all know that they each got 20k?
If so why should the other two not know he's defaulting?
Do you think they'd do the same?
If he reneges on the deal can you afford to live on your income?
If not, what possessed you to lend them so much?

Oldmeg ....there was no intention of dodging tax. It was just their way of getting a lump sum, while I get a monthly income , that's all ...

I think you can give away £3000.00 per year, as gifts and I think it can be backdated one year, making a total of £6000.00.

So if that is the situation, you have given away, in this tax year, ten times your limit.

No doubt someone will have much more up to date information than me. But I would be worried.

I m not understanding, you say you haven’t much money but then talk of a £ 325000 allowance that seems like a good old chunk to me I d feel rich if I had that or have you missed a dot out
Getting back to the problem I would make it quite plain to him that the others have started paying back and you need him to as well I think the idea of just giving him a form for a standing order is a good one The keeping him out of the inheritance may not work as you ve no idea if you will have any left when your time is up

I read it as the £325,00 is the Inheritance Tax threshold for a single person, as opposed to a higher amount for a couple.

If he continues to dodge payment tell him high street rules will apply to the loan and even cheap loans on the high st. charge 3% so that will be added to his loan and deducted from his inheritance upon your demise. Not that I would leave him anything as he's behaved so badly, I'd tell him I'd leave it all to the other two.

Whilst there well may be no intention to dodge tax...either on your behalf or your childrens' however as the old adage goes...'Lack of knowledge of the law is no defence'. I am sure handing over £60,000 in any tax year will need to be declared whether you see it as a loan or not. Please get some decent financial advice.

I can relate to this, as one of my sons would be/has been the same - not that he doesn’t intend to pay back a loan, but his income (self-employed) is erratic to say the least. Fortunately I didn’t lend such a large amount.