Doting grandparents ???

There's always a question of balance :
My mother doted on one of my daughters to the exclusion of my other daughter -which has caused bad feelings - even now all these years later .
When she hit puberty and we had some issues - she'd go to her grandmother if upset with me . My mother would side with her .
Years later , my mother grew to realise her mistake and was horrified by her rudeness and aggression towards me .
If my Grandma hadn't exhibited love towards me I would have grown up without any love whatsoever .
I certainly understand how you feel towards your grandchild and can't hide your enthusiasm . Ask your son what he means and try to adhere to his ideas .

My Mil would occasionally say e.g. a baby was a ‘doaty’ thing, i.e. something/someone to dote on. She had picked it up IIRC from an elderly relative she’d visited in Ireland as a child.
How common it is/was I have no idea.

START A NEW THREAD!
this is from 2019.

I'm wondering if other Grandparents feel closer to their daughter's children than they are to their son's children?

No. Absolutely not.

I treated my kids equally. As I do all the grandkids.
Fortunately, I dont have problems with sils or dils.

We both love our only grandchild dearly, however due to “adoring & doting” parents he, at 9, is turning into rather a spoilt and entitled child, not entirely his fault. I’m quite firm with him and he’s normally nicely behaved with us! The way he speaks to his parents often shocks us and up until around 8 he was the sweetest boy! He’s a bright child but all too often given his own way, partially we believe, because he has two high flying parents, who do lots for him and with him but who have stressful extremely well paid jobs.

Georgesgran

START A NEW THREAD!
this is from 2019.

Oooops!! Why oh why do these threads keep popping up from years ago!!!

I don't like the word 'doting' - it's related to 'dotage', isn't it? I don't think I have ever 'doted on my grandchildren as they have all developed as people and I have a relationship with each one of them, especially as we can converse together as adults. I like to see them and treat them as friends. I suppose the nearest I have ever come to doting is now - on my beautiful, unique and affectionate DGD.

What do you mean by “intense”? I think we need more context or examples of what “intense” looks like to your adult child. But if your adult child used the term “intense” they may be feeling overwhelmed.

My GS’s are adult now. 5 of them. I love them dearly, but I can see their faults and can’t say I ever adored them or doted on them! 🙂

DiamondLily

My GS’s are adult now. 5 of them. I love them dearly, but I can see their faults and can’t say I ever adored them or doted on them! 🙂

Same here DiamondLily I think it sounds quite unhealthy

How do people manage to resurrect these threads, it's from 2019? A bit late to give advice now.