Could my husband have aspergers?

Freya, on my husbands side there's Schizophrenia and Bipolar Disorder. There's also autism. It's something only seen in this generation but I believe if we could see into the past it would be easily spotted given what we know now. Some of his family 'only' have co-morbids such as dyslexia

On my side my mum had BiPolar disorder and that's about it as far as I can see.

Amongst my own children I have one who is severely autistic and one who's Dyslexic. The latter also has CAPD. I also have a grandchild who's the same but that child is the niece of my child who is Dyslexic and has CAPD. There's also another grandchild who is hyperactive but no diagnosis would be made because they're not hyperactive enough for one. But it most definitely is there. Then there's another who has sensory issues that require a sensory diet but nothing else. Then there's another one who would trip over a wet woodbine so to speak.

I find this part of things fascination and nothing surprises us when we spot things though it can be frustrating when you go to a professional and you're told oh, its way to soon to be thinking of these things - come back in a year. Its why we only ever buy in help now - we're listened to and once people realise we know what we're talking about we can sort things out for the person very quickly.

Im now pretty sure my husband is on the spectrum because I have one child with him who is and one of his other children from a different mum is also autistic.

Another thing we see in the family is people who would nowadays be said to have a personality disorder and Im now interested in any relationship there may between ASD and PD. There is research being done and I first heard about it from a psychiatrist where I live and a member of MN who's involved in the research professionally.

BibiSarah, I read that a lot of women diagnosed with BPD are really autistic. At this time, I think there is still a lot of luck involved with hitting the right person who can recognise ASD in someone and differentiate it from other potential diagnoses. Especially with females.

Not saying that is correct about BPD, but it was food for thought and I can see that possibility in someone I know.

OceanMama, I agree with you. Interestingly enough the relative I mentioned in my first post on this thread said to me - oh, I thought I could possible have bi-polar disorder.

I stressed to her that ASD can and does present very differently in females and she probably hadn't thought of it because her experience of ASD is from the male perspective. She's since been doing a lot of reading and yesterday she told me she's just waiting to be put in touch with someone who specialise in diagnosing ASD in females. Im so pleased for her. Its like a tap's been opened these last few days, she discovering so much about herself and whilst there's a possibility she isn't on the spectrum I'm pretty sure she is.

Good grief. You miss gransnet for a couple of days and someone writes your letters for you! The times I have planned this self same letter and never got round to actually doing it. I have wondered for years if my DH may have autism to some degree or if he is a result of his very working class upbringing which has always made him feel very out of place in the very professional (legal ) world he now inhabits. Many years ago he told me he always expects someone to tap him on the shoulder and say "what are you doing here, get back to the slums by the docks where you belong". He has no friends. Has no banter or joking easy conversation. He is much happier in a very formal setting , going to work in a suit, shirt and tie (even in this heat), being called Sir, or going to a formal evening do in a dinner suit and bow tie. He belongs to one of the worlds biggest charitable service organisations and has held quite important roles in it. So we know dozens of people, but have made no friends. He has not got one single practical skill (except changing light bulbs). Doesn't cook, garden, DIY, etc etc. He won't even try to do , fix, repair anything. I am sure it is fear of failure. And worst of all he can't take any criticism at all. Even if he does the shopping (with a list) and gets the wrong thing or misses a great offer, I can't tell him. He doesn't get cross but just goes into " I am useless, no good at anything, get absolutely everything wrong" mode. He is endlessly polite. Insists on walking on kerb side of pavement. Always thanks me for his meals whether it is beans on toast or cordon bleu. He even thanks me after having sex!! I could never ever say anything to him, he would be horrified and devastated to think I thought he had a problem. I am probably way too late to join in this conversation. But it has been so good to write it down!

I found out a few yes ago that my nephew was diagnosed with it, and is parapsychologist said he should look on his father's side of the family, my dad, apparently he almost certainly would have been diagnosed with it if they had known something about it in his life time, I too have it but psychiatrists always pop pop me, as if I don't know what I'm talking about, I think we the sufferers of it no best