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Red flag/Dealbreaker

(156 Posts)
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ILE35 Sat 17-Apr-21 08:05:07

After being on my own for about 7 years I briefly went on a couple dating sites. I got talking to one guy in particular who seems chatty and friendly and interested in similar things to myself.

He’s phoned and video chatted regularly and seems lovely so we arranged to go a walk which went well, followed by a further walking date yesterday. We were together for about 5 hours just walking and chatting.

As we headed back to our cars he out of the blue asked me how I was for money to which I replied that I was ok. He then proceeded to ask me if I could loan him £20 for petrol as he’s struggling at the minute and wasn’t sure if he’d get home! I was so taken aback but to avoid awkwardness I gave him it.

He’s been furloughed on full pay for a year and claims to always be busy doing diy jobs so I’d have thought should have enough money to see himself through the month.

When I got home there were messages thanking me and saying I’ll get it back on Monday and how much he enjoyed our day and couldn’t wait to see me again.

I’ve slept on it and feel any attraction towards this guy is dwindling fast. Would others feel the same or agree to meet again and give him a chance?

I kinda feel like saying keep the £20 and calling it a day ?

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Eloethan Wed 21-Apr-21 17:36:41

Sorry, I should have read the whole thread. I see that you discovered he was definitely not genuine as he asked you for more money. At least he was stupid enough to make such requests at an early stage so you could nip the whole thing in the bud. What a shame - so disappointing to experience such crafty behaviour, particularly when a person seems nice.

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welbeck Wed 21-Apr-21 17:45:36

you my have been on his possible longer term projects list.
he was sounding you out, to see if he could insinuate himself into your life and detach you from more and more of your funds.
well done for side-stepping.

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lemsip Thu 22-Apr-21 14:02:22

in the news today;

www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-9495977/Woman-discovers-love-life-scammer-based-Nigeria.html

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Smurf44 Fri 23-Apr-21 12:16:33

Is there any way you can leave a message on the dating site about his behaviour, or maybe actually contact the site to get him removed?

It might even be worth contacting the local police, not necessarily to retrieve your money, but they may be glad of any helpful info if they have had similar reports about this man. I would definitely contact them before this man defrauds some vulnerable lady into losing her life savings. ??

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ILE35 Mon 26-Apr-21 20:21:34

Smurf44 Yes this is something I will look into doing. Thanks again.

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