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Nowt so queer as folk as they say in Yorkshire

(58 Posts)
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CocoPops Sun 31-Mar-24 19:52:10

My good friend "A" broke her shoulder badly which resulted in hospital admission prior to being discharged home with surgery scheduled for a Total Shoulder Replacement 2 weeks later. She keeps me posted by text.
"A" lives alone so naturally I thought I'd visit with food, flowers and offer to help and sent a message asking her when would be convenient.(I should say the custom here is not to just drop in on people).
She continued to text but ignored my question which I repeated a few days later but again with no response.
Hopefully family will rally round after surgery but they work full-time.
'A' is a close friend but over our long friendship I have never been invited inside her home (nor are other friends) but she visits my place. Of course I accept her idiosyncrasies but wonder if other GNs have friends like this?

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Primrose53 Sun 05-May-24 19:25:19

I never realised people have such hang ups about visiting people or about inviting people in.

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Doodledog Sun 05-May-24 19:27:43

I'd call them preferences rather than hang ups. 'Hang ups' sounds rather judgemental, and most people don't like feeling judged.

I enjoy having people over, and do so often, but I don't like unannounced visitors.

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Primrose53 Sun 05-May-24 20:18:45

Doodledog

I'd call them preferences rather than hang ups. 'Hang ups' sounds rather judgemental, and most people don't like feeling judged.

I enjoy having people over, and do so often, but I don't like unannounced visitors.

I don’t mind unannounced visitors at all. It’s often a lovely surprise.

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Allsorts Sun 05-May-24 20:26:15

What sort of friends accepts others hospitality but never offers it. She’s obviously not bothered I would let the friendship go. She’s rude not replying.,have people in your life that want to be.

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Urmstongran Sun 05-May-24 20:28:39

Maybe some folk just don’t like callers? Perhaps they worry about how to ‘call time’ on the visit?
Just a thought.

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Doodledog Sun 05-May-24 20:28:47

Primrose53

Doodledog

I'd call them preferences rather than hang ups. 'Hang ups' sounds rather judgemental, and most people don't like feeling judged.

I enjoy having people over, and do so often, but I don't like unannounced visitors.

I don’t mind unannounced visitors at all. It’s often a lovely surprise.

But that's no reason to judge those who don't. I don't say that people who enjoy unannounced visitors must be lonely, which is no worse than accusing those of us who don't as having hang ups.

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Georgesgran Sun 05-May-24 20:29:33

Go back through the thread and you’ll see it’s all resolved!!

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