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Is acknowledging a birthday important

(108 Posts)
kitchen Tue 25-Sep-12 08:28:57

As I get older a birthday card from those I love seems to mean so much more. Is this a strange reaction? I am close to both my sons and the younger one is so kind and thoughtful. My eldest son leads a very busy life job wise but seems to forget the little things that mean a lot. I child mind every week and help his wife a lot but she could not even wish me a happy birthday let alone organise anything. A home made card from the children or a telephone call from them encouraged by their parents would have meant so much. I just wish I could understand my daughter in law more. Her family are all widespread so contact is not as regular but she makes so much of them which is understandable. Always polite she continues to have an air of coldness and I cannot get beyond that. On any occasion her attitude seems to be that they are her husband's parents not hers. I love the grandchildren dearly and would not wish to cause any rift but yearn for some understanding.

Faye Thu 27-Sep-12 20:36:43

My ex husband, always a funny man, would tell everyone how many shopping days they had left until his birthday. My family always bought him presents, his mother wasn't one for making a fuss of him.

Happy Birthday Greatnan and Janeainsworth flowers flowers

Faye Thu 27-Sep-12 20:55:18

Happy Bithday Dancinggran I missed your post. flowers

Greatnan Thu 27-Sep-12 21:13:19

Thank you, Soop - I have had a very relaxing day and tomorrow I am having lunch with a woman friend in the lovely town of Neuchatel.

johanna Thu 27-Sep-12 22:52:31

Oh, greatnan, that takes me back.
Over 50 years even. I spent 8 weeks at La Chatenellie. Little finishing school.
Wonderful little town. From what I remember.
With regard to the " finishing " : It did not work!!

glammanana Fri 28-Sep-12 11:59:06

DD is very good and remembers everyone's birthday and spends the year looking for presents that suit she does put a lot into it,whereas DS1 and his partner are very slow in remembering any birthdays on our side but she does go over the top with herown family,DS2s girlfriend is totally different in the fact that she has asked me for a list of birthdays for our side of the family from me and mr.glamma down to DDs and DGCs birthdays she is a very thoughtful girl totally different to DS1s girlfriendconfused

goldengirl Fri 28-Sep-12 22:09:14

I don't like celebrating my birthday although this year's event was pleasant because I got to do what I wanted rather than be organised. There seems to be pressure on the birthday person to enjoy the day regardless and pressure on those around to make it enjoyable even if they wished they could be doing something else. I find the whole thing embarrassing. I think birthdays are lovely for little children but once the age of majority is reached that should be it. The only beneficiaries are retailers!!!!

Ana Fri 28-Sep-12 22:24:33

I agree, goldengirl. I know it sounds churlish, but if I say I don't want a fuss, I really mean it, and I do hate 'surprise' parties etc. Perhaps it's understandable for family and friends to want to mark a landmark birthday - but not each and every one. It's the same with Christmas. To me, it's for children, and the pressure and worry about what to buy Auntie Gladys, Uncle Jim et al just makes it a trial rather than a pleasure.