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Whats it really like living alon

(163 Posts)
CHEELU Sun 09-Dec-12 23:19:49

I just walked down my road and because its dark you can see inside peoples houses and I saw our neighbor who is around 70 sitting in her living room on her own watching TV and I felt for her and wondered what its like to live on your own. I have always thought that I would be ok and that there would be many benefits but am really interested to hear what you all think.

annodomini Wed 25-Nov-15 18:31:40

I've always been happy with my own comany which is not to say that I'm unsociable. I enjoy being part of a group and, more particularly, part of my family. I hate having to leave them when I've been to visit, but soon settle down into my usual idle routine. I read a lot and watch TV selectively.

ooonana Thu 26-Nov-15 12:13:36

I have lived on my own for 15 years now being widowed at 50. There are certainly huge adjustments to make. Only buying food for one in the supermarket was the first hurdle. I always overbought to start with. Getting up alone and going to bed alone is another. Waking in the night and the fear of being on your own is another. When you feel unwell it can be frightening. I have now lots of widowed friends in the same boat and that is the lifeline. Talk to them and share your fears. Go out every day and talk to people, that keeps you connected. Try to have a buddy to do things with as a companion. It has kept me going.

friends123 Thu 26-Nov-15 12:15:44

Practical advice would be to try it sometime?!

bikergran Thu 26-Nov-15 14:08:57

I tried that when dh was in hospital many times, I tried to prepare myself for the day he may not come home, I used to sit and think "right well this is what it is like" but believe me..you can never! imagine anything like that, even when he was in for a month, it's just a different scenario, even though the person is in hospital miles away you know they are still there.

Stansgran Thu 26-Nov-15 14:43:25

To the posters with husbands with terminal illnesses please explore the possibilities of respite care in a hospice.

Matella Fri 27-Nov-15 01:41:52

Has anyone explored holidays abroad that cater for singles? If so how was it?

Charleygirl Fri 27-Nov-15 09:49:55

Matella I tried this over 20 years ago and with the exception of a couple, absolutely awful. About 26 women and 2 odd men. Evening entertainment once was dancing to the sound of an ancient record player in Italy around 6pm. Not quite my style. I would hope that they have changed massively since then.

Matella Fri 27-Nov-15 16:30:15

Sounds gruesome! I suppose it might be ok if it was specifically a walking, craft, orsomething holiday.

annodomini Fri 27-Nov-15 16:46:55

Matella, not specifically singles holidays, but I went on a good many Ramblers' Holidays in a number of different countries. There are both couples and singles and if you are brave you can opt to share a room with another single. I did that twice with a stranger and twice with a friend, otherwise paid for my own room. The couples were a friendly lot and usually socialised in the group. The holidays were available in different grades and I always opted for the easier ones! The secret with these holidays is that everyone has something in common - walking, enjoying the scenery and the local customs. If my hip hadn't given out, I might still be rambling.

Clematisa Fri 27-Nov-15 17:11:23

I've been on my own the last 10 years - though really just about 5 since my mum died as before that I'd be seeing to her needs, and although I'm alone loads I very rarely feel lonely and I think there's the difference.
Went to Malta for my first holiday in 10 years last May - went with another 2 "girls" and thoroughly enjoyed the experience! Would love to take off on my own but I haven't mastered the courage to do that as yet... Good to read all the ideas here so maybe next year!

Matella Mon 30-Nov-15 17:24:39

Thank you for your replies. I think the common interest trips sound the most hopeful.
I wonder how much the Internet helps to get people in touch with like minded would be travellers.

NathalieMartin Wed 02-Dec-15 16:42:58

Today, we are also lucky to have instant communication and connectivity. Whilst it's not always the same as having someone there with you, it's always nice to be reminded of the good that the internet does, as well as the fact that there'll always be someone online willing to chat.