Leaannbo, I'm very sorry that you were excluded. It must have been hard to find out something like that from a third party. I don't think that your reaction was the best, it was understandable that you were hurt and perhaps didn't realise how much stress the family would already be in.
If it were me, I would send flowers to the hospital with an apology for an over the top reaction. Nothing else, no demands.
I do find it hard that you don't know why you are estranged from your family. It actually does sound like they registered private in the hospital to keep you away. Your daughter told you to stop making everything about yourself? Is this something you've done before.
For example, at a child's birthday or holiday have you felt left out and lashed out? This is a common theme in DIL groups. I myself am not a MIL, I have a great relationship with my MIL but not so much my own mum.
If you truly want to move forward and 'possibly' be a part of their lives, there needs to be a lot of self reflection. Something has caused their reactions. Another time (not now when they are going through so much) you could send a polite letter stating that you really want to self reflect on the past and would their input on where things went wrong. Nothing else, no demands, no talk of reconciliation. Hopefully they can remind you of things from the past.
In order to move forward the bitterness and resentment has to be put aside. This is where I'm stuck in communicating with my parents. My dad is so angry that we wont let him babysit our kids that he wont talk to us, the kids or even look at us. They know what they did and have admitted to many things but they can't move past the hurt. Can you move past it and accept that perhaps there was a reason for all?
Their perspective won't match yours, however their feelings have almost certainly been hurt. It may not have been your intention but almost certainly you have hurt them. Their response to this has hurt you.
Moving past anger is so difficult to do and something my parents and I still can't do. There are no easy solutions but as soon as you can accept what's happened and at least your part in it, maybe you can start to heal.
I wish you all the best
Static caravan purchase is it worth buying
What Should You Know Before Ordering Wagyu Steak Delivery Or Buying Wagyu Steaks For Sale Online?
