Gransnet forums

AIBU

Phones etc and manners

(111 Posts)
ClareAB Fri 21-Aug-20 12:54:51

My OH drives me mad when, in the middle of a conversation, he picks up his phone or computer and starts scrolling, answering messages etc. It feels like he's simply not interested, disengaged and bored.
It has got to the stage where if he picks up his phone and looks at it whilst I'm talking, I simply walk away and tell him I think it's rude.
He either doesn't get it, or simply doesn't care. Am I being unreasonable to find this aggravating and rude?

NannyG123 Sun 23-Aug-20 12:55:09

I do take my phone out with me. If I'm with a friend or family when it beeps. I say ill, just look at this quickly. If needed immediate response I'll text back. If not phone gets put away until I can respond. As a childminder I sometimes get texts from parents about a school activity. I reply so they know I've seen text. Think it's very rude when someone constantly looking at phone whilst in company.

MissAdventure Sun 23-Aug-20 14:02:53

It defeats the object of having a mobile phone if you leave it indoors though, doesn't it?

annep1 Sun 23-Aug-20 14:49:19

Mobile phones have their uses of course. I am at the caravan and its great to have it. My husband knows we can contact each other. And I've been able to text my son who wasn't feeling well.
But do we really need to be available for calls 24/7? Or receiving messages. Mobile phones take up too much of our time nowadays imo.

Toots Sun 23-Aug-20 14:50:10

Oh dear.. I've had my head in my phone for over half an hour reading these comments...and not even half way through yet!.. ? seriously, I never use it when we are having a conversation, with husband (he's out at the moment!) or friends, and never EVER when my Grandaughter is around.. time with her is too precious.. but perhaps I have too many sneaky looks at it in the day... and sometimes evenings.. but I do like to keep busy, even when watching telly, so I often have my puzzle book on the go... do you think that's as bad, when I should just be watching telly with my husband.. ?

annep1 Sun 23-Aug-20 14:55:14

As long as you don't feel the need to carry your puzzle book with you when you go out Toots. ?

instagran Sun 23-Aug-20 22:57:30

It's a phenomenON. (Phenomena is plural.)

Lexisgranny Sun 23-Aug-20 23:16:03

I must admit to an iPad addiction, in fact I would choose it over a tv any day. However I wouldn’t dream of looking at it when there are other people around. It is comparable to those who used to feel that “just turning the tv down a little” was appropriate when unexpected guests arrived.

Carenza123 Mon 24-Aug-20 07:56:46

I also have a husband who is constantly on his iPad, but now I think “if you can’t beat them - join them”! He also when using his mobile phone has the speaker on, so I can hear everything he and the recipient says! Drives me nuts. He also wants to know exactly who I am speaking to on MY phone and all the ins and outs. I resort now to telling white lies and secrecy. Due to this Covid we spend ALL our time together (which is not healthy). Any social interaction is limited these days - and I am accused of having “no conversation”. Well, after 50 years of marriage I am not surprised.

ClareAB Fri 28-Aug-20 10:43:51

Thank you all. I showed my DH the comments and he was graceful in his acceptance of the 88 out of 89 comments describing the frustration this behaviour engenders.
Interestingly it also led to a discussion with my eldest son who has deleted social media from his phone as he realised that he was getting into a bad habit. My DIL is very appreciative too smile
I guess this technology is so new, etiquette has not evolved as quickly, yet. smile

LadyBella Fri 04-Sep-20 18:02:44

It's the same with people who video a show. For goodness sake, just watch it while you're THERE.