PREGNANT NOT ILL

My poor niece was so ill she spent most of her pregnancy in hospital. I feel sorry for your DiL,

I'm sorry that your dear friend is so unwell. I'm sure you're feeling very upset. Another poster on here has encouraged you to cut your DiL some slack. I hope you do because like others on here have opined, you will end up the Mother in law from hell & estranged from your son, DiL & baby.
Take a telling from Gransnet and if you can be anything at this debilitating & worrying time for the new soon to be parent(s), be kind.

I did have sympathy at first now I want to put my shark hoover xl pet on you and suck you into the cavity and pop you out into the bin for tomorrows collection.

You’re absolutely correct. You don’t have to swallow anything and they don’t have to give you the status (and joy) of being a grandparent or visit you ever again.
YABU. Totally. Drop the indignant consternation for kindness otherwise you’ll need to change your username.

The more I read the more I think this is a sick joke, can there really be people out there who think this behaviour is normal?
If it’s for real, then I think you and your husband are really horrible people, and I imagine you are about to lose your son, if he’s got any backbone, he won’t be visiting you any time soon.

I don’t believe this, it’s a wind up , no one is this arrogant

Grannie2B

To all those who are saying I should be careful or I'll be on the estrangement thread.

I'll not be held over a barrel where seeing my GC is concerned. Am I to run round and take all kinds of rubbish just incase they swipe the child away to punish me

People are saying they were in hospital with their pregnancies I do sympathise, it must have felt awful but you were PREGNANT not I'll. It will any an illness and it may feel awful and drain you but it isn't an illness and today's mums behave like it is all of them "Nearly died" giving birth these days. Never mind women have been pregnant and given birth for generations since time began.

I think you forget that this is a forum mainly for older people, many of whom may have been pregnant and had extremely serious illnesses so had experience of both.

I'll not be held over a barrel where seeing my GC is concerned
How do you intend to see your DGC if you are cut out of their lives?
If you won't take any advice I wondered why you asked for our opinions?

JaneJudge

I did have sympathy at first now I want to put my shark hoover xl pet on you and suck you into the cavity and pop you out into the bin for tomorrows collection.

???

Janejudge my feelings exactly!

Look we are a traditional family with respect for elders nobody cuts people out or speaks out of turn. My DS is not a mummy's boy he is a man who has been brought up with strong family values and respect.
I understand that this is not how things are done these days and that your dils are in charge because they hold you to ransom with the children but my son wouldn't allow that kind of behaviour nor would any of the other members of our family.

Are you for real or are you working through a checklist of all the attributes NOT desired in a parent and grandparent?
Qualities any soon-to-be parent would shield a child from?
You’re the one making sick comments, not your DiL Look into the mirror Grannie NOT 2B.

Yep. I thought this was genuine to begin with - even sympathetic with OP but last comments are all about DIL shortcomings! Nothing about terminally ill friend! Forget it guys - just a wind up

Grannie2B

Look we are a traditional family with respect for elders nobody cuts people out or speaks out of turn. My DS is not a mummy's boy he is a man who has been brought up with strong family values and respect.
I understand that this is not how things are done these days and that your dils are in charge because they hold you to ransom with the children but my son wouldn't allow that kind of behaviour nor would any of the other members of our family.

???

I came to gransnet because it's for grandmother's and all I have found is a bunch of women terrified of no contact being implemented at the drop of a hat. You should never have brought your dc up to behave this way towards you. Tantrums are for toddlers not grown adults with your GC.

It follows a pattern
Outrageous OP

Drip fed more outrageous posts.

Then disappears never to be seen again.

This will probable be deleted but come on, GNers we’ve seen it so many times before.

I'm not believing this now.

My dear friend is not terminal and she and I are from the same ilk where family values are concerned

I'm am ? because I had an outdoors distanced visit from my lovely DIL and one DGC today.

My beautiful DD2 wasn’t ‘ ill ‘ as you say but ... thankfully both she and my GC5 are with us.

Grannie
Really this is getting a bit iffy now

This will probable be deleted but come on, GNers we’ve seen it so many times before.

Yes, but we'll be in trouble Oopsadaisy because this could just be genuine however farfetched it may seem.

Our advice is well meaning and very sensible, OP even if you don't like it.

Message deleted by Gransnet. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

I haven't insulted anybody or been rude all I have done anything other than state why dils comments were unacceptable especially in our family and in her position

Oops

We cross posted! I agree!

The only reason anybody has given me to accept that awful comment was just in case Dil won't let me see GC. That's not right and I'll not be held to ransom. That's not how a family should run is it. On fear?