Nanny or Grandma

Oops! with half a brain

It’s got nothing to do with ‘class’ Grandma70s. My mother was very working class - school cleaner, shop cleaner, etc, but her grandchildren always called her ‘nanny’, just as my grandson calls me ‘nanny’ (but spelt ‘nannie’).
What’s in a name anyway? It’s how they treat you that matters.

annehinckley

This won't help, but it might amuse you. My children named their grandmothers 'Granny Cat' and 'Granny Dog'.

That’s funny, when they were little my Son nicknamed us as future Grandparents as NannyKnitKnit and Grumpy Grandad, so that’s why the nickname stuck, my Daughter introduced her baby to my Husband as Grumpy Grandad (its only a joke because he ‘s not grump) but me as nothing

How about askIng DD what she would like you to be known as?
However my DD made a big thing of sorting out what everyone - there are 2nd marriages - in the grandparent generation. I was to be ‘granny’...........in due course DGD came up With Gangan, so hey ho!!

I was called Nanny by my 1st Granddaughter, used by her mum. My other daughters girls call me Nana, encouraged by her as she hated Nanny, I said I preferred Nanny but she insisted. As soon as her eldest called me Nana it was music to my ears. When I was a child I called mine both Grandma so never got them confused as my eldest Granddaughter does sometimes.

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

I’m Nana to all of my grandchildren who are old enough to speak and I’ll be Nana to the latest one as well unless he comes up with something else. I’m also Nana to other children in the family because of the way things are done here.

I’m very happy to be Nana as that’s what my mum and grandma were. They were fabulous at it and if I’m half as good at is as they were I’ll be happy.

My Grandson is struggling to talk and at 3 next month, he has limited vocabulary. He shouts Gaaarrrr at me, but it means the World to hear and don’t mind staying Gaaarrr either. X

I am nannie to 3 nan to 1 and nanna to 2 and I love it. I always envisage granny /grandma as those from the Victorian era plus I had 2 wonderful nans myself. Each to their own and I certainly would not be rude about what other grandparents choose to be called unlike some other posters on here.

As Georgesgran above. Perhaps the baby will settle the issue when she starts to vocalise. I was a first grandchild and my first attempts at "Grandma" were "Mama" (rhymes with llama). So Grandma, who was very 'proper', became Mama, and was known as that by ALL the family for the rest of her long life (lived to be 100). What's in a name? It's the relationship that matters!

jannea how do we know you’re not an old goat you might be an old grandma goat judging by that comment ???
Use what ever title you want and stop stressing over it

Rocknroll5me

I think you are rightly upset at your daughter’s rudeness to you. They are infuriating. Ask her what she would like to call you to her child. She won’t say ‘nothing’.

Rocknroll5me finally someone who totally understands, I could high five you!
My Daughter was very rude when she said it to me, I put it down to teenage stroppiness, when I asked her what she would like be to called and she hasn’t suggested anything so I’m lumbered with no name, and it hasn’t been in the 5 days since the baby has been born it’s been since we found out she was pregnant.

BlueBelle

When my daughter was expecting her MIL immediately claimed Nana..... which to be honest is the ‘handle ‘ I wanted! But as she only had couple years to live, I bowed to it. I was Nanny when they were little , and now at 13 and 8 I’m Nan. As I’m still alive and ‘Nana ‘ isn’t , I couldn’t give a ‘tinkers cuss’ what they call me. Neither should you. You’re here, breathing and enjoying your gorgeous grandchild....be thankful !

BlueBelle

jannea how do we know you’re not an old goat you might be an old grandma goat judging by that comment ???
Use what ever title you want and stop stressing over it

???

I didn't want a "title" when my grandchildren were born. Our six grandchildren know us by our actual names and love us just the same. I feel we have exactly the same loving relationship with our family as others who call themselves Nanny or Grandma or whatever.

I call my husband by his name, I don't call him "husband", I call my children by their names - not "daughter" or "son". My grandchildren know I am the mother of their mother (or father).

I know this first name thing isn't for everyone, but what I'm trying to say, Crochetjo, if your sweet new grandchild were to call you Nanny, Granny, Grandma or even Jo, nothing will take away from your special bond that comes from love.

As long as you have a healthy grand child be thankful for that.Does it matter what the child calls you ???????

I don't think anyone meant to be rude. A Nanny is a children's nurse, usually very well paid and well liked by the children she looks after.

Nanny is some parts of Britian means a grandmother, either because soldiers in India had heard children addressing their maternal grandmothers as Nani or because small children who hadn't matter the letters g and r said Nanny instead of Granny.

OP congratulations on your grandchild, in a while, ask your daughter what she wants the little one to know you as, as she doesn't like Nanny - perhaps because she didn't have a relationship to her own Nanna.

I think you are a bit previous on this one !
I can see your point in one way, that your DD refers to everyone else with a title and then nothing for you, which must be hurtful.
Why not ask your DH to have a quiet word with her?
However you want to be referred to, later on, the little one will give you a name, that will be special between the two of you as well as probably unique!
One of my aunts was always called "Cuckoo " by her eldest grandson - that was what she used to call out to him whenever she saw him when he was little. Another friend's grandmother was Blessim - one of her most common sayings!
Whenever you talk to your GD, you can always refer to yourself as Nanny " Nanny loves giving you cuddles", " Let Nanny read you a story" "Can Nanny help you?" and so on.
Your DD has enough to deal with, becoming a mother to be worried about who is called what at the moment or maybe she'd just like you to be called by something else!

sarahellenwhitney

As long as you have a healthy grand child be thankful for that.Does it matter what the child calls you ???????

The baby can’t call me anything because she’s too young, when she can talk I’ll be happy to be called whatever calls me, my issue is until she can speak I would like to be known as her Nanny but my Daughter won’t let me but she has given no alternative. I’ve heard her say to her other Grandmother and Grandfathers ‘do you want a cuddle from your Grandma/Grandad’ but I just had ‘do you want a cuddle’.
I’ve been so excited that I’m going to be a Grandparent I just want to shout it from the rooftops ‘I’m this baby’s Nanny’

I think it's fairly obvious to people -- with half a brain-- that nanny isn't referring to a goat.

Yes. Homonym of the English language.

It was DH being difficult it this household, he thought I should be grandma and took a while to adjust to me insisting on Nana.
Nana didn't happen! It evolved to Nanny, Nan and Nanny Wishes which is fine by me.

Someone up thread said what's in a name and implied it didn't matter. I agree with the OP a name is personal and it does matter.

Well I was always hoping to be Grandma but for some reason my now 8 year grandson called me mop as a baby but heh ho I'm happy to be called anything

'Grandma' or Gran is by tradition used for the maternal side- the baby's mum's own mother.The term 'Nanna' ,or nan,nanny,is traditionally given to the paternal side- the baby's Dads own mother.Maybe that's why your daughter said she won't call you that? But then that wouldn't explain why she's using 'grandma' for her boyfriends mum?- Has the boyfriends parents been asked what they prefer? (Grandad/grandpa is same whichever side) Or were the names used by chance first by the boyfriend? Next time they come round, stand next to them and wave a hand between you &other 'gran' and say "well what name AM i having then?just so we can differentiate between us both??" Explain about the traditional 'Nanna/Grandma' labels, and let her decide then, you might be surprised to find the boyfriends mum prefers the traditional 'nanna/nan/nanny' and is happy to swap. Or if not ask your daughter outright what the little one IS going to call YOU then? Has your DD always called you 'mum/mother' or does she refer to you by your first name at all? That could be the crux of it.As others have said, the child, once speaking may well have its own 'special' name for you- as kids we used the traditional names, but my sister couldn't say it so called our mums mum 'gran' & our dads mum "grammy"- i myself have sons kids who call me Nanna and 2 Daughters kids call me Grandma.Try not to let it spoil this time for you, but you DO need to know how to refer to yourself, or for others to refer to you, regarding your GC, as years down the line it will be too much of a mouthful (if youve to ring school for example?) "Oh, im 'so&so's (childs name)mums mum!"

I don’t mind what they call me, as long as they call me!

Many congratulations on the birth of your grandchild! How wonderful and you will be so involved too, lucky you. What's in a name, as Shakespeare said? Had similar issues but with grandfather names. Now, delightfully, our grandchild has a come out with their own unique name for my husband, and he us tickled pink! It is so special and we hope it stays. The same may happen to you. One of my grandmothers was 'Nana' which may be a compromise for you? Perhaps you could start calling yourself that ("Come to Nana") and see how it all evolves once baby starts making sounds. Don't let it spoil this precious time, but I completely understand your feelings. Emotions are very high at this time. xx