Are You a Lady? ?

I really don't care if i am called lady, Hen, Love, Duck etc but please i am far to old to be called a girl.

My boss always says to her young daughter ‘ say thank you to the ladies’ as she leaves nursery. I always think it’s lovely.

i have been called a lady but usually ignore it, the only time i answered back was a stupid man arguing with me and he said...oh your such a lady, my reply was....i am not a lady, i am a bitch and you would do well to remember that. the look on his face was priceless. i always think of a lady as snooty with a twin set and matching shoes and handbag.....sorry to any ladies....lol.

Personally I don’t mind lady or woman, so long as it isn't ‘girl’.
I too refuse to be offended unless it’s intended to be derogatory.

I really don't mind what I'm called, my delivery man just called me 'love' half an hour ago. As long as it's nothing rude then people can call me what they like.

I would somehow rather be referred to as an old lady than an old woman. But I'm not exactly sure why. And from children and teenagers "that lady over there" somehow sounds much more pleasant and polite than "that woman". Maybe it's just a generational thing. Having said that, I do understand the snobby connotations and therefore why some dislike it.

I didn’t used to mind the various love, darling, my lovely etc but now I feel they are saying it because of my age, like they do in care settings. In shops I would rather be called ‘madam’ or nothing at all. If they know my surname then Mrs Sky.

I like to think that I'm a lady - but I do think that this is old fashioned now.
In OakDryad's exercise - I would use Lady for numbers 1 & 2, but woman or women for the rest.

Similarly, as Cabbie21 points out, I would want a hairdresser to refer to me as her "lady", rather than woman or person.

What do you think about being called a lady? (My underline). It's a polite form of verbal address, especially in the plural (as Whiff says) to substitute for proper names.

Hear hear

I was always told to be a lady in the drawing-room and a whore in the bedroom - it has worked well for me:-)

As my mum used to say- I don’t mind what you call me as long as you don’t call me late for tea

I would rather be called ‘ladies’ than ‘guys’.

I gather no-one is supposed to say 'Ladies and Gentlemen' these days in case of upsetting those who identify as Other. As for 'Lady'. I guess it depends. If the golf club bore is asking "And what would the ladies like to drink?" or something like that, it sounds horribly patronising and yet somehow in that context it is probably better than saying 'women'. Generally I prefer to be referred to as a woman. Not a girl. And NEVER a cis-woman. I am not a subspecies of my own gender.

FannyCornforth

timetogo2016

My Dh calls me his lovely lady and i recieved a letter from the NHS referring to me as a lady.
Looks weird on paper,i prefer a woman all day long.

Consultant’s letters are weird.

There was a thread on MN some years ago discussing whether they way the patient was described was some sort of code used by HCP’s.

A letter that I recently received from a surgeon, referred to me as ‘this pleasant 54 year old lady’.

I was fine with lady; I would have hoped for something more effusive than pleasant; and he got my age wrong!

I think that DH got a consultant’s letter describing him as a ‘charming gentleman’.

I was referred by consultant to another as this very charming lady …I’m really showing off here!

I don’t mind “guys”.
When I was little saying “woman” was not acceptable, you had to say lady, but I’m not bothered by either really although I sometimes find “ladies “ a bit patronising …eg from male waiter. Easy enough to say “ is everyone ready to order ?”

I've just remembered - I was at a poetry reading recently and a very dishy poet introduced his poem with reference to his lady (meaning his wife/girlfriend, not a damsel in a Romantic poem). It's old fashioned, probably a bit 'poety', and I'm not sure that I would want to be called that by Mr Dog, but I have to say it was very sexy .

I actually like being called a lady as long as the person keeps the age reference out of it. . People who call older women ‘young lady’ make me want to punch them in the face lol so bloody condescending.
I really don’t appreciate being referred to as an old lady either lol even if I am ?

Definitely!! I think gentlemen are a good thing too! Also children and young people - you know the word I'm not saying.

I am quite happy to be called a lady or a woman. I hate being referred to as a 'guy'.

I quite like being called a "lady", but not an "old lady", as in "Mind you don't bump into that old lady!" spoken yesterday by a mother to her child cycling near me in the park.

My old mother used to tell me, "Women live in streets. Ladies live in roads, drives, or avenues...."

I'm quite happy to be referred to as a lady, in fact I'd take it as a compliment. I don't always behave like one! I don't really mind what people call me, except guy, I hate that!

Dempie sorry that ‘old lady’ made me laugh!

I knew a true gentleman who owned a hotel in my home town - he used to call me Tha Lady Sarah, and convinced all his guests in the bar that I was a real aristocratic Lady. Apparently I was 'marrying down' as I was engaged to his chef...

I think it is a lovely term, I know many women, but wouldn't call them ladies...I've only met a few who earnt that title in my life so far.

OakDryad

This is an interesting exercise:

For each of the example sentences below, you have to decide whether to fill the blank with ‘woman/women’ or ‘lady/ladies’.

1. She was a perfect ——— about it.

2. The church flowers were arranged by the ——— of the congregation.

3. Esther thought of her grandmother as a strong and capable ———.

4. Some ——— reported that they experienced multiple orgasms.

5. In Victorian times, it was common for ———to die in childbirth.

6. A ———was raped in the city centre last night.

If you found yourself making an an intuitive preference can you explain why?

I used woman or women in all of your sentences, except the first.

Not that I would have used that particular sentence myself. I would instinctively say, " She was very nice about it."

To me "lady" implies either that it is used to convey that the women concerned adhere to a higher standard of good manners, or is due to an outdated sense of class.

Neither case applies in the other sentences, as whether or not a person died in childbed in Victorian times, or in Africa today has nothing to do with social status.

I admit a child might regard her grandmother as a strong and capable lady, but to me, as an adult, woman is preferable there too.

Hello Fanny

Is my male perspective on this of interest?

I use the word 'lady' and not 'woman' if the need arises to refer to someone adult and female. I do that because I am trying to be respectful.

For examples,

"There is a lady on the telephone asking to speak to you."

"When I rang yesterday, I spoke to a lady who was telling me about your range of products. Is she there please?"

However, I never use 'young lady' or 'old lady' or 'elderly lady'.

There is a wikipedia article about the use of the word 'lady'.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lady

Also, if needing to answer a question as to which lady in a group, I would not refer to anything about her age, skin colour, or physical appearance; though that can present problems if they are all in the same uniform.

I notice that in that article there is the following.

> a man in the same context would not necessarily be referred to as a "gentleman".

In fact, I do use the word 'gentleman' in such contexts.

For examples,

"There is a gentleman on the telephone asking to speak to you."

"When I rang yesterday, I spoke to a gentleman who was telling me about your range of products. Is he there please?"

Don’t mind being called a Lady, what I despise is being called “Madam” !!!!!
Makes me cringe ?