Where did 'please' and 'thank you' go?

Where did 'please' and 'thank you' go?

Sorry, but I think my 22 month old dgs has got them all - he seems to have an endless supply, anyway, insisting on saying 'thank you^ (well, kang-koo) every time he offers something to someone else as well as when he is given something! 😂

Long may they remain OldnProud

I had two of the grandsons with me at their local corner shop. They were handed their bags of pick and mix sweets as I was given my change and said thank you. I piped up “And what do you say?”, prompting the boys. At which the shopkeeper straightened up nervously and blurted out “Thank you”.

With you 100%, nahsma. My rationale totally.
Another, beloved of Freecycle is Can I get this?.

OTOH, a lady called to collect some unwanted stationery and office supplies - nothing special. She came complete with a bottle of red wine, explaining she was new to this 😳.
Had to put her right that there was no need to come bearing gifts🤭.

The last generation of parents have often failed to teach their offspring these basic social skills. Some people even find "please" and "thank you" demeaning.

I have several times reminded entitled individuals that this is NOT Downton Abbey and I am NOT their servant.

I always hope that the teams on Only Connect who can't be bothered with Please and Thank you will lose to the polite ones. It doesn't save them any time and sounds very churlish!

I am amazed at the lack of very basic manners when it comes to people being given items.

I'm on a holiday park just now, and had something that I offered on the site FB group last night, saying it was free, but needed to be collected ASAP. I got a reply saying 'What number?'. Not 'Yes please', or 'May I have it?', just 'What number?'. I replied, saying 'Does that mean you would like it?' and the reply was 'Yes' . This was followed by a PM asking my number, and could I hang onto it until it was convenient for him to collect it (I said no to that, as he was on the park too, we have had visitors here all day, and I wanted it out of the way).

He did say thank you when he picked it up, but I didn't know whether to be amused or annoyed at the rudeness of the exchange. I didn't expect effusive thanks, as if nobody wanted it it would have gone to the tip (I have a new one) but it was almost comical.

The last thing I gave away on the park had a similar response. Would I bring it to the forecourt to save her coming to me to pick it up? Erm, no. It's free - come and get it if you want it (it didn't need a car). If there was any possibility that collection could be difficult I would have delivered, but again, she was here, and you can walk from one end of the park to the other in ten minutes.

Our local Facebook giveaway group bans people who don’t say please or thank you, the admin are doing a good job.

Good for you, nahsma, that was really nice of you!!

I find on fb most people do say please and thank you it’s the ones that don’t turn up that irritate me and the prize one is
‘Is this still available’ and you say ‘yes it is’ and then you never hear another word 🤣

This probably seems nitpicking but I find it grates when some contestants on ‘Who wants to be a millionaire?’ fail to say ‘please’ or ‘thanks’ when Jeremy asks if they would ‘like to set their safety net’.

I think encouraging children to say please and thank you does them a great service. Simple courtesies oil the wheels of life.

Wheniwasyourage

I always hope that the teams on Only Connect who can't be bothered with Please and Thank you will lose to the polite ones. It doesn't save them any time and sounds very churlish!

We will have to differ on that one.

Maybe it's just me, but I actually find it slightly odd on that type of show like if people keep saying 'please'. Once, OK, but to do it repeatedly begins to make me cringe.
To my mind, contestants are just following the format of choosing a catagory, and that is all that is required. I would find it equally odd if they said thank you after they were shown or read the selected question, though I can't say I have noticed anyone do that anyway.

I love Millionaire but get annoyed when the audience gives the correct answer and the contestant does not raise their hands to clap a ' thankyou '
No need for them to turn and face them just a high clap would suffice!

i wonder if this is an effect of so much popular culture being american.
there is an american family, living in uk, whom i follow on youtube.
very nice, educated, interesting people recently had twins.
when the father was left in sole charge, i noticed how he barked orders at his older girl, bring the bag, put it in the car, check the twins etc.
even when all was completed and on their way, never heard a please or thank you.
it surprised me. they all get on nicely.
as his 4 older children are at school here, i wondered if it might cause friction, if they don't learn to say please or thank you.

My two eldest GCs always say when asking for food in a restaurant "may I have the ......please." Their father always says can I get!

I was having lunch out today and heard a Grandad say to small child on his table “what’s the magic word?”

“Abracadabra” said the child!

Two of my DGS were so polite when we went to Subway: “Please may I have some onion”, “Please may I also have some lettuce”, etc, etc. Luckily they weren’t very busy at the time!

Grannybags

I was having lunch out today and heard a Grandad say to small child on his table “what’s the magic word?”

“Abracadabra” said the child!

That's lovely

Whenever the Boy Wonder or L’il Miss say please or thank you unprompted I always praise them by saying ‘lovely manners good to hear them’. They smile and I think it’s nice to notice and compliment them.

welbeck

i wonder if this is an effect of so much popular culture being american.
there is an american family, living in uk, whom i follow on youtube.
very nice, educated, interesting people recently had twins.
when the father was left in sole charge, i noticed how he barked orders at his older girl, bring the bag, put it in the car, check the twins etc.
even when all was completed and on their way, never heard a please or thank you.
it surprised me. they all get on nicely.
as his 4 older children are at school here, i wondered if it might cause friction, if they don't learn to say please or thank you.

Nearly 60 years ago I did a school exchange with the English Speaking Union to Louisville, Kentucky.
I loved the accents, the old fashioned “Southern” manners but was struck by the absence of Please and Thank you at the same time.
Commenting to my exchange partner she said they were equally amazed by the way we Brits said Please and Thank you all the time , often repeatedly. They didn’t equate its absence with bad manners!
Different habits?
I’m definitely in Team P&Q!

Another noticeable difference is that British people say ‘sorry’ all the time- even when someone bumps into them and it isn’t their fault. I have to stop myself doing this, even after the 50+ years I have lived here. Often we say ‘ yes thanks’ where you might say ‘yes please’ . Just different habits.

exactly. these people whom i watch are v mannerly, which is why it surprised me.
the man originates in rural arkansas, but worked near/in DC, the woman from ?coastal carolina/virginia, both much travelled.
the youngest at school child now sounds a bit northants ! wonder if he says P&T more.

my comment is in reply to RosiesMaw's last.

I said sorry when 'almost bumping' into a stranger. She responded (l thought extremely aggressively) with 'you damned Brits are so damned polite'. So, rather shocked, l automatically said sorry again 😄😄😄 she's American.
We ended up friends.