Double loss and feeling fragile

Good post anno, well said.

grannyactivist

Thank you all for your kind comments. And yes, GagaJo, my condolences to you too.

My relationship with my mother was not without difficulty and she had been ill and frail for many years, so processing her life and death will take some time - and I expected that. But the raw emotion of childhood memories re-surfacing has taken me by surprise, and not only me; my older brother had a meltdown because our mum had always refused to answer his (very valid) questions about painful aspects of our childhood - and on the day of her funeral he finally had to accept that he would never receive the answers he craves. He arrived at, but almost didn’t come in to the funeral service, and I had to use all my powers of persuasion to get him to attend and join us at the wake afterwards.

Life can be so complicated.

I could have written much of this post myself GA. My mother and I have never really got on, but I'm glad I was able to spend her last couple of weeks with her. I hope I helped her feel that I loved her.

My brother also had a breakdown (in the midst of his severe illness) at her death. He was mostly unable to visit her in her last days, due to his own hospitalisation. Hard.

My mum isn't having a funeral. We will scatter her ashes once my brother is fully recovered, probably not until the summer. Hopefully by that point, we will be able to celebrate her life, rather than being felled by grief.

So sorry, grannyactivist and GagaJo to hear of what you are both going through. Sending you both and [hugs]

Oh you poor thing that all sounds so hard. Not only the tragedy of the little girl's death but also the worry of the future for her sister and Mum and Dad too. You must be kind to yourself xx

I am so sorry you are having a difficult time

Sorry for both of you and anyone else struggling in this way.

From me to both of you x