Harry: "I want my Father back. I want my brother back"

Sure cakeface welcome to gransnet, I'm Violet

Are you talking about Harry there or?

Thanks again to MOnica for her brief description of family memories that differ. I’m certain we’ve all had this experience.

I believe that Diana had enough ‘evidence’ to convince her that Charles wasn’t in love with her, he was in love with Camilla. She was a naive 19 year old in a nightmare situation.

W and H grew up in an increasingly toxic relationship between their parents. They then faced a traumatic bereavement - all of this in the public eye.

Anyone with the slightest knowledge of or interest in family dynamics won’t be surprised the two sons dealt with and reacted to these experiences differently. It doesn’t make one brother the good boy and the other sone kind of villain

VioletSky
I did think before I posted. Do you suppose I just grabbed the words out of the ether?
This is an open forum. I will post what I feel is appropriate for the thread or a poster.
If you are offended press to report button, no skin off my nose.

How do we know that Charles hasn’t apologised to his sons, possibly more than once. Sometimes apologies go ignored, or don’t fill the need, and the apology needs to be repeated again and again, but is never enough.

How would we know the apology status in this particular family, or any family, it’s private. Harry has made his need public, but we don’t have the full picture (and it’s not our business, we didn’t ask for it).

However, he’s put it out there for public consumption and debate so, understandably, it’s being talked about.

VioletSky

MerylStreep just think before you speak.

My mother is not up for debate here.

VS, I think you’re quite right that your mother shouldn’t be up for debate, but you put her on the thread, which makes that possible.

Think before you write.

MerylStreep

VioletSky
I did think before I posted. Do you suppose I just grabbed the words out of the ether?
This is an open forum. I will post what I feel is appropriate for the thread or a poster.
If you are offended press to report button, no skin off my nose.

I'm sorry but I'm just not interested in personal comments

I don't make them and I will object if I receive them

Happy to discuss the topic though

Mollygo

VioletSky

MerylStreep just think before you speak.

My mother is not up for debate here.

VS, I think you’re quite right that your mother shouldn’t be up for debate, but you put her on the thread, which makes that possible.

Think before you write.

Conjecture about what my mother thinks or feels does not belong in thus thread Mollygo

I am here, she is not

If posters wish to defend an abuser in some way, then they may of course do but as I have just explained, I will object to the defence of my abuser

Delila

How do we know that Charles hasn’t apologised to his sons, possibly more than once. Sometimes apologies go ignored, or don’t fill the need, and the apology needs to be repeated again and again, but is never enough.

How would we know the apology status in this particular family, or any family, it’s private. Harry has made his need public, but we don’t have the full picture (and it’s not our business, we didn’t ask for it).

However, he’s put it out there for public consumption and debate so, understandably, it’s being talked about.

I’ve been reading the thread thinking exactly the same thing, people are making some pretty damning assumptions based on one person’s account, whoever your allegiance is with.

I'd say we disagree. I'll debate no further as my faith matters to me as I'm sure yours does to you

I think we do.

But do not assume that my faith, if any, would be reason for fidelity in marriage, knowing how many religious leaders fail to live up to the standards they preach to others.

My conscience is a different matter, of course.

No one else remembered it but their false memory was nursed and carried forward for years.
Can anyone who knows enlighten me, that if someone feels this strongly about a bad memory, will it keep coming to the surface even if everyone has apologised? So, if Harry gets an apology from Charles, does he shut up for good or is there something in the brain that won't ever let it go?

VS, I think you’re quite right that your mother shouldn’t be up for debate, but you put her on the thread, which makes that possible.

X post Casdon, I believe we were thinking along the same lines.

I essentially agree with you Iam64 especially when you say that siblings, faced with the same situations, will react differently. The problems arise though when one of those siblings thrashed around wildly to destroy the whole family instead of getting proper help for their failing mental health. Maybe William sought out mental health support via more conventional therapists rather than the more alternative choices that Harry made.

Mollygo

VS, I think you’re quite right that your mother shouldn’t be up for debate, but you put her on the thread, which makes that possible.

Sure, you can do as you wish

But I'm not the only one who mentioned my estrangement on this thread so would ask that people stop singling me out

I believe we were thinking along the same lines

Me too. I would imagine that no apology be sufficient no matter how heartfelt or sincere that may have been. Some people just identify as a victim and that's a powerful role to play in a family.

I don't know if there's something in the brain Joseanne but perhaps something in the personality. Victim status perhaps and/or the need to constantly punish the person/people they feel has done them wrong.

What a wonderful opportunity Harry had, to go and live in considerable comfort in another country with his wife and family.

Once the immediate media interest had died down, which it would have done eventually, he'd have been free to get on with his life free from press attention and to a certain extent, out of the public gaze. After all, wasn't that what him and M claimed they wanted?

But no. It seems that the only way he can add to his already considerable fortune is to use his title and his family to make money.

Regardless of what may or may not have happened in the past, it is Harry who is the abuser in the present and his family's silence is quite possibly more damning of his behaviour than anything they could possibly say.

This brings back thoughts of the family of Barry Manakee, all that Diana said of him being her true love, she even visited and then criticised his burial place, he had a wife and 2 daughters

Message deleted by Gransnet. Here's a link to our Talk guidelines.

MerylStreep

VioletSky
I’m more than happy to drop the subject of your mother.
I find your continuous wittering on about her extremely boring. Obviously you don’t.

I'm not here for your amusement

I'm not here for your amusement
🤔
MerylStreep didn't say she was amused.

I would guess the problem is that I'm talking sense

VioletSky

I would guess the problem is that I'm talking sense

Are we discussing Harry's book here?

I don't know, are you all done having a pop at me?

Up to you

Id rather discuss the topic, I'm really not that interesting

Id rather discuss the topic

Good, back to Harry and his problems.