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Undecided to keep Christmas gift from husband

(71 Posts)
MooM00 Sun 12-Jan-20 00:37:32

Hi, my husband doesn’t usually buy me a gift at Christmas without asking what I would like. This year I asked for money but he went out on his own and bought me a necklace and earrings with my birth stone garnet. The problem is I don’t really like them but feel guilty as I would like to change them but don’t really want to hurt his feelings as I know he put a lot of effort into choosing them. Should I come clean or just be grateful and wear them when I go out with him.

DanniRae Sun 12-Jan-20 12:57:02

If I asked for money for Christmas and Mr R bought me jewellery you can bet that he looked in a jewellers and saw the set was 50% off !!
After nearly 50 years I know how his mind works. So I would definitely tell him that I wanted to change it grin.
But I am sure this doesn't apply to your husband so I would keep it and wear it just for him!!

frankie74 Sun 12-Jan-20 13:09:47

Slightly different story...but there are similarities. When I was a student, a friend of a flatmate became my ardent admirer. He brought me liquorice allsorts on a regular basis, after I graciously accepted them once. I have always loathed them, but didn't tell him first off because I didn't want to hurt his feelings. Hence he persisted with the gift and the longer it went on the harder it got to tell him. It all ended well as I moved student lodgings and the contact was lost. But he could have spent his student grant better on himself....food..fags...booze...drugs... whatever!! grin

Esspee Sun 12-Jan-20 13:13:17

I would be extremely tactful but ask if he would be offended if you exchanged it. Otherwise you are not going to wear it are you? Such a waste.

Maggiemaybe Sun 12-Jan-20 13:21:12

If the OP was April born, she might have got a diamond necklace, Tigertooth!

Garnet is the birthstone for us January babies.

Saggi Sun 12-Jan-20 13:23:05

Grateful.... my excuse for a husband of 47 years had never ‘gone out and brought me a present ‘ ....47 years!!!! Wear your present occasionally , and count your lucky stars , he knows you exist!

ReadyMeals Sun 12-Jan-20 13:27:21

If my husband bought me jewellery I'd just have to tell him I'll keep them in my trinket box to admire from time to time. I can't wear jewellery not even a wedding ring it gives me something a bit like claustrophobia to have stuff cluttering me up.

threexnanny Sun 12-Jan-20 13:33:48

It was the other way round with us. I bought an 'experience' for my OH and put a lot of thought into it. However, as soon as he had it he was on the site looking to see what he could swap it for! Yes, I am offended ( especially when I think of the unsuitable things I've kept that he bought), but on balance I just want him to have something he will enjoy.

Xxjanexx Sun 12-Jan-20 13:42:27

I’d keep them also....a lot off love and thought went into buying them.
Your very lucky my DH bought me 5 pairs off leggings one year all wrapped up separate.
I really thought it was a joke and he give me something special after the presents we’re all unwrapped, but no?
I went upstairs and cried.

Aepgirl Sun 12-Jan-20 14:11:57

I think it would be very unkind to change the gift. Just wear it occasionally.

GreenGran78 Sun 12-Jan-20 14:36:37

BlueBelle many a true word spoken in jest! My DH bought me some jewellery that I really disliked, but I pretended that I loved it. He was so pleased that he had found a gift that I really liked that he bought similar items for me several times after that.
The funny thing is that I find that I don’t want to part with them now, even though he died four years ago, and I never wear them.

BlueBelle Sun 12-Jan-20 14:59:38

Ahh I can understand that greengran

ElaineI Sun 12-Jan-20 15:36:54

This year I received jackets from Debenhams bought online. One was too big! so I returned it and the other has started exuding fluff from the inside so took that back as well which is a pity as it was lovely and warm but was a lot of fluff! I usually like to buy these kind of things in shops and try on so will have to hit the shops tomorrow for a replacement. Jewellery I would probably keep though I think DH would ask me first.

Notthatoldyet9 Sun 12-Jan-20 16:06:15

Be glad ypu have such a nice husband

MooM00 Sun 12-Jan-20 17:38:17

Thank you so much for all your replies, you are a romantic lot. I have decided to go with the majority and keep the gift. As many of you said I should be grateful that my husband went to great lengths to choose them for me.

moggie57 Sun 12-Jan-20 18:10:53

maybe you can put them in a drawer and wear them on special occaisons..after all christmas is a time for giving .not receiving .keep them ,they may grow on you,. because maybe one day you will say i wish i had kept them.

PamelaJ1 Sun 12-Jan-20 18:22:35

When we were young and hadn’t got any spare money I asked my husband to buy me a pair of earrings that I could wear all the time.
Readers he bought me ? ?, they ding when I move my head.???
They are still in a box and I wear them every Christmas.

BlueSapphire Sun 12-Jan-20 21:59:04

I had always said for years to my late DH that I would really love some diamond stud ear-rings. Well be did buy me diamond ear-rings, but they were not studs but a completely different shape, and I just did not like them. If I had kept them it would have been a complete waste of money as I would never had worn them.
Glad to say he had no issue with us both going back to the jeweller and exchanging them for a simple pair of studs, which I love, and he did too.

mosaicwarts Mon 13-Jan-20 00:21:25

I think your husband bought them with love and wanted to see you in the set, I hope you will consider keeping them. I always, always regretted rejecting a watch my late husband bought me. He was obviously upset, and I couldn't take my words back.

drifter Mon 13-Jan-20 02:13:27

Just say nothing and let it pass.i bought my gf a 42 inch flat screen tv for xmas she always wanted one.her eyes lit up and very happy

BradfordLass72 Mon 13-Jan-20 05:24:17

Garnet is my birthstone too and I love them - send them to me grin