"Popping in" on someone without notice.

When you visited my grandmother there was a set routine. After 2 hours visitors, like fish, began to stink! She would stand up and announce "Time for you to go. I have things to do so Ill get your coat." And she did. You did not argue with my grandmother.

In contrast people, including neighbours, often popped in to my parent's house. The front door to the street was never closed until after dark. They would open the hall door and call out "Its only me!" It was one of those communities where everyone knew your business and what colour knickers you had on. I hated it.

Hate it. Always have. I once left my MiL standing on the doorstep because she dropped in with no notice.

I don’t mind, even when I worked from home, although it happens rarely, the majority of people txt or phone first to make sure I’m in.

Hmmmmm, ok this has made me think long and hard and because literally everyone i know contacts me first to see if I'm in on such and such a day and i do the same with them and it wasn't until i read this thread that i sat up and thought about it which then made me think about how would i feel if someone just 'popped in'.

Ok, well i wouldn't like it for the sole reason, I wouldn't be prepared for their presence in my home. Dont get me wrong my hone is ALWAYS tidy tidy tidy but you could bet your bottom dollar that things hadnt been put away or there was a speak on the carpet or my hair hadn't been styled, blah, blah blah.

Stupid but there you go.
I would never ever just 'pop in' on my friends because i would think that they felt the same as me !!!

I am so happy to be back in a place where I can pop in regularly and people do the same to me. It never happened in London mainly because everyone around me was so busy. My house here is top to bottom glass across the front, so difficult to hide. The dog is pretty good at alerting me if someone is coming up the drive, giving me time to brush my hair! I like it.

dolphindaisy
You call these persons friends ?

Hate it. I think it's rude to assume it's convenient to visit and expect me to stop or change my plans.
I had plenty of this over the years and have found that those same friends wouldn't allow me to visit unless I made an appointment.
It always seemed to happen when we were having dinner, they would come in the back door and say "Oh are you having your dinner?" still stand there and in the end I'd tell them to go and sit in the living room.
Other times I perhaps had a bus to catch, decorating or other things to do. So maddening.
I had a friend across the road who would be constantly and I mean constantly walk into my house. She would be looking out of her window when I got back from going out some where and when she wasn't over here she would phone me. She eventually moved away thank goodness.
I've since learned to be a bit more assertive but fail when it comes to my relatives.
They wouldn't have taken advantage if I had have my ex husband still living here.

I've learnt which friends like being popped in on and which don't

I generally don't like it but there are a few exceptions to that who have been told 'pop by any time" lol

I've always wished I could be someone who could just leave my door open so people could pop in anytime, but I just can't be that relaxed. I like to have time to tidy up a bit (both me and the house!)

I would never call on anyone without contacting them first either. I assume they feel the same as me!

It used to annoy me when family popped in without warning. Now I live alone and the worst offenders are no longer here. I miss that spontaneity.

I'd rather people text/phone first to let me know they are dropping in, but wouldn't hide or deny people entry if they just turned up. However, Ì do always contact people if I want to call in and see them.

Fine - but only 'popping'. Just a five minute and then off away. IF you mean to land in for half the day - be polite and check before!

It sounds a lovely idea in theory. But no I hate it. My sister and her husband popped in when I was having a bad M E. day..in dressing gown, unwashed, hair a mess. I felt worse by the time they left. I wouldn't call on people without asking if it's convenient

I hate it too, and likewise, I would never call on anyone else unexpectedly.

Years ago, when I was a child, in the sixties, our back door was always unlocked. We called our neighbour Mrs. Yoo hoo! Obvious reasons.

All my doors have been firmly locked all our married life.

I loathe people popping in, and would never do it to anyone.

I’m afraid I like to have my calendar in order a week in advance and my friends know that. It sounds very boring, but that way I don’t double book or let friends down.
I’m not keen on ‘poppers inners’ and like a bit of warning to check the calendar to see if
I’m needed for DGS1’s pre-school pick up 2miles away or if I need to get DD2’s dogs out while it’s still daylight, etc.

25 miles away - so almost an hour driving time.

I would always make contact before visiting. I have written before about dropping by to see an old friend (years ago now) and finding a neighbour there who must have thought I had gatecrashed, never again, I like to check I am welcome.

They are all welcome. If I am busy, I can say so; and if I am not, I have a lovely time!

Big no no because I want to be a good hostess and dedicate my full attention to my guest.

My dropping by, I cannot do that.

By, not my

I need notice of visitors. I always like to present a tidy house, but I need time to make it tidy!

Josieann

I am so happy to be back in a place where I can pop in regularly and people do the same to me. It never happened in London mainly because everyone around me was so busy. My house here is top to bottom glass across the front, so difficult to hide. The dog is pretty good at alerting me if someone is coming up the drive, giving me time to brush my hair! I like it.

josieann
Thank goodness for your post ?
This thread has certainly born out the view that people all over the world have of us: insular.
Well not me or Josieann ?

MerylStreep

Josieann

I am so happy to be back in a place where I can pop in regularly and people do the same to me. It never happened in London mainly because everyone around me was so busy. My house here is top to bottom glass across the front, so difficult to hide. The dog is pretty good at alerting me if someone is coming up the drive, giving me time to brush my hair! I like it.

josieann
Thank goodness for your post ?
This thread has certainly born out the view that people all over the world have of us: insular.
Well not me or Josieann ?

You're welcome, anytime MerylStreep.

We've never had a problem with pop ins,we dont lock our door our friends will knock and walk in .Its how we've alway been and people are always welcome.