My DIL ad DGD both have Covid (not feeling too bad) but my DS and DGS haven't got it. DS and his wife are sharing a bed but he still hasn't got it. He and my DGS want to get it so that they don't have to start a quarantine again later on. It may be very infectious but not everyone seems to get it. If your husband has had all his vaccinations (including the booster) and done his LFT he might well be OK. Could he not isolate at home to save the hotel staff. May be against the rules but I would be very tempted if it was my adult child.
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Advice please re a Covid problem
(152 Posts)Hi Everyone,
I’d be glad of your advice/opinions, please.
My husband’s daughter lives in London and has just tested positive for COVID. My husband is driving down to pick her up on Xmas eve - a 3 hour journey and take her to her mother’s home ( the next village to us) so she can spend Christmas with them. Understandably my husband doesn’t want to think of her spending Christmas alone in isolation. On Christmas Day my four children ( all of whom incidentally work for the NHS) plus two grandchildren are coming for Xmas and Boxing Day . I am very unhappy that my husband is knowingly putting us all at risk by being in such close contact with a positive case. I have worked hard to remain calm although I am inwardly seething but have said that if my children knew they would ( rightly in my opinion) refuse to come at Christmas. They cannot knowingly compromise the health of their patients . I feel
I cannot keep something so serious from them. My husband has agreed , albeit absolutely furiously, to go and stay in a hotel over Christmas once he’s dropped his daughter off. I’m perfectly happy for him to do this but I wondered what others thought and if anyone could suggest a better solution! Incidentally he was meant to be spending part of Christmas Day with his elderly parents but doesn’t want to put them at risk .
"MissAdventure' the doctors in London hospitals have stated 80% of the people in hospital for Ormicon are unvaccinated or went in with some other illness and tested positive once there..
Isolation is isolation whatever time of year you are unlucky enough to be placed in that situation .
Isolation means that you have to stay on your own, without mixing with other people and is supposed to stop the spread of this illness.
So your husband is quite happy to not only possibly spoil his own Christmas , but yours and your family's Christmas by his absence, as well as possibly spread Covid as well.
How kind that he doesn't want to affect his own parents, but your family and GC don't matter!
Can only suggest your stepdaughter tests each day as advised and your OH takes her to her mothers, hopefully , for New Year.
You and your husband should not even have this dilemma. His daughter has put you in a terrible situation, what is the matter with her? Is she not an intelligent adult? Maybe she's not but if she is she should be telling her Dad not to worry about collecting her at Xmas but she will wait until until she is clear to join her Mother. Surely she knows about online videoing? Sorry, she can't help testing positive but she is the one in the wrong here.
There is no question in my mind that the daughter should stay in isolation and not meet anyone else. Sadly there are hundreds of others in the same situation this Christmas including a number of people I know. We can all chat on Zoom which ,of course, is not the same as being together but is the only sensible option.
I really think all this wishy washy advice we are being led by is making people this it is absolutely fine to do what you want, like having covid and getting someone to drive you 3 hours to someone else's house. This woman isn't a child, she is perfectly capable of staying at home and catching a train to see her Mum after Christmas when she is negative again
is making people think it is fine to do this
Sad though it is to be alone at Christmas, I think the daughter should grow up, realise that there are many others in similar positions and she is not only breaking the law but putting others, who may be vulnerable, at risk! The husband is complicit in this and should in no way be involved in such selfish deceit. Even if it were my own child, I would be sad but would not alter my stance on this situation.
Unfortunately she will infect him in the car journey. My partner was positive last Sunday. We were out the day before in the car. We live together anyway. We work in the health sector and many patients have got it..it has spread like wildfire. I tested positive today so can't work now. So the incubation period is only 3-4 days.
Absolute madness! No wonder the virus is spreading so fast. Presumably intelligent people surely can understand the rules on isolation. She must isolate whether it be Christmas, new year Easter or any other day.
I could not believe what I was reading. She is supposed to isolate...what does she or your husband or her mother not understand about that?
Not only is your DH being exposed but his DDs family are too putting goodness knows how many others at risk. Isolation means staying away from others. Had this person lived with others she would need to stay away from them eg stay in a room on her own as far as possible. No wonder the virus is spreading when people are behaving so irresponsibly. Christmas is one day surely DHs daughter would survive on her own kniwing she was protecting others.
I think I’m probably going to say the same as everyone else. Hope so.
Sad as it is...your step daughter shouldn’t be going anywhere before 7 days. Certainly not being picked up by someone who, I assume at the moment is well.
They all sound very selfish to me.
Your husband has one selfish daughter!!!!!!
Yellowmellow
Your husband has one selfish daughter!!!!!!
Can't think where she gets that from.
Covid positive SiL received a visit when she didn’t answer her landline. DH and I had 4 calls each. When I asked what they would have done if I hadn’t answered the phone I was told they do spot check visits now whether you answer the phone or not.
How is the daughter getting home, presumably putting other people at risk?
Also, he shouldn’t be going to a hotel, he should stay in self catering accommodation having first shopped for supplies before he picks up daughter.
No offence intended here, but I’m flabbergasted, to be honest.
Self-isolation means just that. He should not be collecting her and she should not be leaving her home.
I tested positive on Sunday and live alone. It’s my GC’s birthday today, so I’m missing that as well as Christmas Day.
Sorry, but please don’t go down this path!
If the husband does stay at a hotel after dropping his daughter off he’s then putting the hotel staff at risk even if he isolates himself in his room as much as possible.
And all the guests he/they come into contact with, families, friends…
Maybe suggest he take her mum to her, along with a care package and 20 lots of ready meals for her and her mother.
Hard as it is we can’t just move the goalposts to suit ourselves. Believe me if we could I wouldn’t be at home fretting while my daughter, who lives 90 mins drive from us, is isolating alone with a very poorly 2 year old. She had Covid last year and thankfully hasn’t picked it up this time. They’re going be alone on Christmas Day and every ounce of me longs to go and support her but it’s not the right thing to do and anyway she wouldn’t even consider putting me at that risk.
I’m joining the gobsmacked gang. This variant spreads like wildfire. 75%of those at a small Christmas gathering one of mine went to a week ago now have the virus. 9 families now isolating because the daddies had a beer together.
Your husband should stay with his daughter for 10 days unless LFT confirm neither is infectious 7 days after he moves in with her
Is the daughter in question a child? If so, let her father go and stay with her for Christmas.
If she is an adult, she should be self-isolating in her own home, Christmas or not. She should not be going anywhere at all.
One of the reasons this pandemic is difficult to control is because some people interpret the rules to suit themselves.
I am glad to hear that OP refuses to let her husband anywhere near the rest of the family.
Kate - your step-daughter should remain in London in self-isolation until she has done five days of negative flow tests - it's so selfish for anyone living in London (and that includes me) to even dream of leaving the city right now as we are at the epicentre of this virus. Your husband needs a good shake up - maybe your adult children could give him one as he's putting you at risk as well.
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